I have been with the same man since I was a child, and now suddenly have to start all over again, and have never actually dated. I have no idea how to even start.
2006-07-16 15:33:53 · 23 answers · asked by dazy23 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Join a dating service. Don't start dating online... you will find many liars that way. Take your time and don't rush it.
2006-07-16 15:36:06 · answer #1 · answered by camping_girl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately fear will be a factor 4 you. I speak from experience.It's absolutely terrifying.But there is hope. Try going to the gym and to church. They're good places to meet nice new people at a slow pace. Avoid blind dates and letting your friends set you up with people. It's forced and awkward and you don't need that right now. The most important thing to learn and accept is the fact that you are going to be alone for a while. And that's OK. Just take advantage of the time by working on yourself instead of having a pity party . And when you're ready it will happen for you. Just take it slow and remember the new guy is not at fault for the 10 years lost in the previous relationship. And neither are you.
2006-07-16 22:51:56 · answer #2 · answered by killmylandlord 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Slowly, because it takes longer than it should, to find someone to date. So you've been with the same guy, since you were both children? That's an accomplishment. You've never actually dated? Well, the girl can take turns with the guy, on asking the other out. But the guy has to be in charge most of the time- you can discuss things, but he has to make final decsion. If a guy asks you out, girl, you say yes. You dress nice- although dressing like you would for church is good, for the first date. You and he can show affection to each other in public. If you find a bf for yourself, who has dated or knows how to date, let him guide you.. You and he have to both be open, with the other. Don't be hesitant. But start out as friends, and progress at own pace.
2006-07-16 22:40:38 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First you probably shoud spend about six months to one without dating, getting you know yourself again. I broke up with a man I dated for twelve years, spent a year and a half hanging out with friends, reading books, doing the things that I really enjoyed and didn't mind doing alone. During my down time I wrote a list of all the things I'd like for the next mate to have in order of most important and then another list of the things that I absolutely would not compromise on. I got a better mate because of it, I met my current love at a ball field and I have no regrets. It will happen for you again, but stay true to yourself, don't rush and NEVER settle!!!
2006-07-16 22:39:02 · answer #4 · answered by Dancer3d 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is a difficult one. I have been in an on-again, off-again relationship for the past five years. It is hard to start dating again. Just take it slow. Go out and meet new people and realize that going out on a date does not mean that you have to marry them. It is a chance to get to know someone new and perhaps make a new friend. If something else occurs great, if not that is fine too.
It will take time. But the most important thing is for you to go out and have fun. Do not sit at home and pine away. It just makes things more difficult. You deserve to be happy.
2006-07-16 22:37:14 · answer #5 · answered by A. C 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dating is a skill that (for most people) takes practice.
In your case, you probably have most of the social skills
so perhaps you just need some confidence. Generally,
people find confidence (with limits) sexy.
In any case, find a place filled with people of both genders
that you like. Invite multiple people to go do things - and
eventually you can start inviting single people to do things
and even single people that you find romantically interesting.
And of course, as you see and are being seen by more people,
you will probably get some invites yourself.
In any case, 10 years of putting up with some guy's foibles
makes you well equiped to take on the dating world. Just
keep it easy and fun for awhile.
2006-07-16 22:40:41 · answer #6 · answered by Elana 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie I have been through the same thing.. keep your chin up and stand tall. You can do anything. I found my true love on-line. Although he was killed Jan 30, 2005 by a jerk on a snowmobile...I currently have a new relationship and just live life day by day. Anything is possible as long as you want it. You do not need him to be strong. Seems to me you have already reached out. You just need to know you are a great person and have life to go forward. I hope you the best because there is always someone out there to make you happy again. Day by day and live your life to the fullest. You never know when it will end. Make every minute count. YOU CAN DO IT !!!
2006-07-16 22:41:41 · answer #7 · answered by italliansweety67 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start slowly, there's some decent guys out there. My suggestion is to start a hobby, something that might give you a chance to meet guys on safe ground and give you something to discuss, a mutual interest, maybe photography, gourmet cooking, who knows? Whatever you do make sure that you are not looking into a relationship to fill a void. It's always best to be with someone because you want to, instead of because you do not want to be alone. Good luck and I'd actually love to talk with you. You may contact me at toddmayo@yahoo.com
2006-07-16 22:49:42 · answer #8 · answered by lifeisgood 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
take it slow. Having newly entered the datin scene again after 16 or so years, I can tell you it is tough. Try on-line dating - it seems the women get a lot of propositions. Just be careful - don't expose too much personal info out there. Or... go through friends for dates...or join a singles group at church...or join a 'divorce support group' to make some friends who can lead you to a good guy. Good luck!
2006-07-16 22:37:11 · answer #9 · answered by 2thseeker 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was with the same guy for 9 1/2 years, since I was 18. Once the relationship was over I didn't know what to do. There was this guy at work and I hated him. He kept asking me out and I kept saying no. Finally I said yes so he would stop bothering me. Now 3 years later we are happily married. Who would've thought..... hang in there, you meet the person of your dreams when you least expect it... you will!
2006-07-16 22:41:21 · answer #10 · answered by eeeeeeeeclipse 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get yourself a good mature girlfriend who can show you the ropes as things are not what they use to be when you were dating before. Make sure she's not a sl-ut...just a girl who knows her way around men. Don't go out alone for a while; cause unsavory men can smell a new-comer a mile away. Get some good dating tips from other women..that's your best bet.
2006-07-16 22:37:15 · answer #11 · answered by Sassy OLD Broad 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋