Want 20 points?

Question

Give me a funny, funny joke AND amswer my question "How do you do that little thing you do so well"? question with any lame remark.

You actually have to put a remark on other question....otherwise howcan I give you the points...lmao

Answer 1

Did you hear about the dwarf who took viagra?

He won the 3-legged race! lol.

Answer 2

A blonde is walking past a store when she sees this absolutely amazing looking flat screen tv. She walks into the store and approaches the man behind the counter and asks " How much is the tv in the window?",

He replies "I'm sorry love but we don't serve blondes in this store". So she leaves.

The next day she decides that she really wants that tv, so she disguises herself with some big sunglasses, a big hat etc.

She arrives at the shop and asks the same question. The worker replies "Lady, I told you yesterday we don't serve blondes in here, now leave please". So again she leaves. This time thinking that she'll just disguise herself even better tomorrow and try again.

The next day she turns up the at the store in even bigger sunglasses, a brunette wig, platform shoes looking completely different to before.

She approaches the counter and asks the same question again. The worker replies "For the third time, we don't serve blondes now get out!!"

She says " How can you tell it's me?"

He replies" This is an appliance store, the tv you keep asking about is a Microwave Oven. We don't sell tv's!!"

Answer 3

This blonde decides one day that she is sick and tired of all these blonde jokes and how all blondes are perceived as stupid, so she decides to show her husband that blondes really are smart.

While her husband is off at work, she decides that she is going to paint a couple of rooms in the house. The next day, right after her husband leaves for work, she gets down to the task at hand.

Her husband arrives home at 5:30 and smells the distinctive smell of paint. He walks into the living room and finds his wife lying on the floor in a pool of sweat. He notices that she is wearing a ski jacket and a fur coat at the same time. He goes over and asks her if she is ok. She replies yes.

He asks what she is doing. She replies that she wanted to prove to him that not all blonde women are dumb and she wanted to do it by painting the house. He then asks her why she has a ski jacket over her fur coat. She replies that she was reading the directions on the paint can and they said....

FOR BEST RESULTS, PUT ON TWO COATS.


i do it becuse im ME!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 4

A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: "Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says: "OK, now what?"

Answer 5

What Do U Call A Cow Without Legs. Ground Beef!!!HAHAHA

Well Cuz Im A Sharp Guy

Answer 6

How many jews can you fit in a car?

2 in the front 3 in the back and about 600 in the ashtray

sorry if it offended you...

ohhhh and i just push bottons closed on the flute hehehehehe

and you plan on posting another question and having the same person answer it and get another ten points right? lol check ya later ♥

Answer 7

I don't know where you got the idea that you could conjure up 20 points.

Sounds like a "Bait & Switch" sales pitch employed by used car salesmen..

Rather dishonest to put out that attraction to get people to do your asking.

I hope that you are more honest and forthcoming in your real life.

Answer 8

A construction worker on the third floor of a building needs a handsaw. He sees one of the laborers on the first floor and yells down to him, but the man indicates that he can't hear. So, the guy on the third floor tries to use signs. He points to his eye, meaning, "I", then at his knee, meaning, "need", then he moves his hand back and forth, meaning, "handsaw".
The man on the first floor nods, then drops his pants and begins to masturbate.

The man on the third floor freaks out and runs down to the first floor yelling, "What the heck is wrong with you! Are you stupid or something? I was saying that I needed a handsaw!"

The laborer looks at the carpenter and says, "I knew that. I was just trying to tell you that I was coming."

Answer 9

A guy is hiking up a mountain when he sees a girl standing at the edge of a cliff, crying."Hey, he says, "if you're going to jump, how about giving me a ******** before you do it?" "My life's been nothing but crap," say the girl. "So I might as well." After the girl's done, the guy says, "Wow, that was great. Why are you so depressed, anyway?" The girl replies, "My family disowned me for dressing like a woman."

Answer 10

oh yea its an ancient chinese technique called kikyoasse


oh yea the joke part...

ok

The Day I Died

It got crowded in heaven, so, for one day it was decided only to accept people who had really had a bad day on the day they died.

St. Peter was standing at the pearly gates and said to the first man, "Tell me about the day you died."

The man said, "Oh, it was awful. I was sure my wife was having an affair, so I came home early to catch her with him. I searched all over the
apartment but couldn't find him anywhere. So I went out onto the balcony, we live on the 25th floor, and found this man hanging over the edge by
his fingertips. I went inside, got a hammer, and started hitting his hands. He fell, but landed in some bushes. So, I got the refrigerator and pushed it over the balcony and it crushed him. The strain of the act gave me a heart attack, and I died."

St. Peter couldn't deny that this was a pretty bad day, and since it was a crime of passion, he let the man in.

He then asked the next man in line about the day he died.

"Well, sir, it was awful," said the second man. "I was doing aerobics on the balcony of my 26th floor apartment when I twisted my ankle and slipped over the edge. I managed to grab the balcony of the apartment below, but some maniac came out and started pounding on my fingers with a hammer. Luckily I landed in some bushes. But, then the guy dropped a refrigerator on me!"

St. Peter chuckled, let him into heaven and decided he could really start to enjoy this job.

"Tell me about the day you died?", he said to the third man in line.

"OK, picture this, I'm naked, hiding inside a refrigerator...."

Answer 11

2 fleas are trying to cross the road. One looks at the other and says "so..you wanna walk or take a dog?"

and how do I do that thing I do so well? Practice, baby!