Are you born with it or do people have to always work at it? I can't understand why I have lower self esteem than anyone I know and it gets worse as I get older. I tried to write a list of good things about myself and I only came up with 4 things! that's not good.
2006-07-15 10:06:15 · 16 answers · asked by mkk 2 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Find more things good about yourself. Promote yourself to yourself. Find ways to succeed. Be happy with who you are. You are special because you are you. Care about others and show this care. They will give you self-esteem.
2006-07-15 10:20:46 · answer #1 · answered by robert r 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I try to perform esteemable acts, no matter how small. I think if you DO good things, you'll have something to FEEL good about. And do them without expecting a reward.
Like today for example. I went to a 12-step meeting which I attend regularly. There was an older gentleman there who had relapsed and drank alcohol last weekend. He drank so much that he ended up in the hospital detox unit. He was able to come to the meeting (which is at the hospital) and told everyone what happened.
I decided I would just go say "hi" to him after the meeting. He kind of blew me off. He had had 21 years sober before this incident, so maybe he felt I had nothing useful to share with him, since I've only been alcohol free for 16 days.
But it was a wonderful experience. I didn't feel upset at him at all, because I understand he had a rough time the past week. I hope that he always remembers that there are always people available to talk. Normally, I would have said to myself "O screw YOU, old man..." But I am coming to understand that it's not all about me and what people think of me. If I can be helpful or useful to someone, then I will try my best, and not worry about whether I get rewarded or not. If I look like an idiot, so what? I at least did what I thought was right.
PS: Here's a saying I like: "OTHER PEOPLES' OPINIONS OF ME ARE NONE OF MY BUSINESS."
2006-07-15 11:13:20 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I grew up overweight and got made fun of it, so I had extremely low self esteem all through high school, I hated myself and was withdrawn. One day though I woke up and realized my friends and family liked me for me. It didn't matter what other people thought of me and I slowly worked on re-building my self-esteem. I've been graduated for 3 years now and I'm not confidant in myself nor do I have low self esteem. I just understood one day that the only thing that matters in my opnion and no one elses. Good Luck I wish I had a better answer!
2006-07-15 10:12:02 · answer #3 · answered by Chyler D 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
your lowering your self esteem on your own. stop worring how much more others have than you get out do more things the more goals you accomplish the better your self esteem will be.Don't sit back and worry about others don't even worry about yours ge out there and do somin productive. become a volunteer clean a neighbors yard for free do something for nothing and expect no praise for it.if you get it cool if you don't just realize you did a good dead without expecting anything and you will see a change in your self esteem as well as the respect from those around you......
2006-07-15 10:20:32 · answer #4 · answered by wardancer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best way to build up your self esteem is to do good things for others. Volunteer at a hospital, church or food kitchen for the poor. Doing good things for others does not only build you up mentally, about yourself, but it also builds you up spiritually and since the physical, mental and spiritual are inseperable you will be helping all three.
2006-07-15 10:15:26 · answer #5 · answered by J-Artist 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to realize that how we view ourselves is originally deemed by the people we are around however there comes a time in your life when you need to give up on caring what other people think about you and start believeing in yourself, you came up with 4 things, that is GREAT somedays I can't even come up for 1 thing. You have to pat yourself on your back for at least one thing everyday even if it is as simple as waking up in the morning.
Give yourself credit for all that is accomplished on a daily basis no matter how insignificant it seems.
Don't look to other people for your affirmations or acceptance, life is way too short to get caught up in other peoples ********.
Think of it this way, what are you stressing about today? Now think about what you were stressing about this very moment 5, 10 or even 20 years ago. Can't remember can you? Life is too short, carpe diem my friend!
2006-07-15 10:13:46 · answer #6 · answered by ashleyligon1967 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Learn a new skill. self esteem and confidence comes from being able to do things. There is other ways but cant remember them right now
2006-07-15 20:51:58 · answer #7 · answered by JoeDraco 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Self-esteem is within you from the day you were in this world.And the more you enjoy life and yourself the higher it will be.It all depends on how much you love yourself and your life.Believe that you are beautiful and worth more than anything.Good luck.
2006-07-15 10:11:21 · answer #8 · answered by Sophia 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have a really good friend, ask them. Usually other people can tell more good qualities about you then you can.
Smile when you are walking on the street, people will smile back and you will feel better very soon.
2006-07-15 10:19:02 · answer #9 · answered by saskia b 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hang around only positive people that accept you for you.
Never stoop below any level you know you are capable of.
You have to tell yourself that you are the best.
Tell yourself that you look the best.
Don't care what other people say about you.
Form no opinions of yourself.
2006-07-15 10:14:03 · answer #10 · answered by cdl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋