My ex BF emails me and writes a very long letter saying that he's very sorry for what he did to me and that he remembered that I told him that IF he wanted me back that HE would Have to Work hard for it. He says that he is willing to do ANYTHING to get me back...but I do not know if I want him back...I don't want 2 get hurt again and to tell you the truth..I still love him very much....but I do not know what to do...............should I give him a chace to prove himself or not?
2006-07-15 00:48:55 · 20 answers · asked by Kairi_Thompson 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
we need to know WHY you broke up...
2006-07-15 00:50:10 · answer #1 · answered by Paige 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all - you have to determine that the 'reason' you broke up is worth the work of getting back together. Sometimes, the reasons we leave people are so deep seated and we know they are not, or we are not going to change. In this way, you will be fighting a loosing battle. For example, I had a friend who had a drug problem which is why we broke up. I KNEW he would not change and I walked back into the relationship hoping he would - and it got worse. I eventually let it go. You have to have open communication with this man and if you really love him, you both have to spell out the issues and deal with them DAILY. If you are thinking that you will be hurt again - it's natural to feel this way. It may be too soon for you to jump back in again. Be friends. Go on dates. Talk on the phone. Allow yourself to really dig into what went wrong. Watch for changes. If you don't see any - then you'll know. And for goodness sake - keep sex out of it while you are trying to determine what's best for you. Sex will only confuse the matter and make you think you are even more in love with this man. I wish you the best - but I advise you to take it slowly. People who make promises that they will do "anything" to get you back - always scare me.
2006-07-15 07:58:07 · answer #2 · answered by THE SINGER 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should do what is best for you and not because you feel bad for him and don't want to be the bad person. Remember the things that drove you away. Yes people change but how long has it been? Do you actually see and feel a change in him? We all want to help other people but you need to not do it at your expense. Look out for number one- it may sound selfish but in the end if it turns out bad you alone suffer the consequences. Make your choice wisely and you decide to give it a second go- do so slowly. Good luck.
2006-07-15 07:56:15 · answer #3 · answered by D baby 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You say you are still very much in love with him but not sure you want him back in your life. You will need to decide what you want and what is best for you.This is not in any way an easy decision but one you must make. He may really and trully want to change to keep you in his life, only time will tell. No easy answer for this one. Just do what you feel you can handle now after being hurt so badly. No one can tell you how to feel. Pray on it.
2006-07-15 07:56:28 · answer #4 · answered by ND M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if u love him then yes, dont b 2 hard on yourself. Just expalin that IF u decide to give him another chance that its all on ur terms. IF he hurts u again then 4get him and dont go back. If u get back with him try 2 remember y ur with him, because u love him but also to give him another chance to prove himself
2006-07-15 07:52:22 · answer #5 · answered by ♥Sexy D♥ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trust is a very important part of a relationship, if someone breaks that trust it is very hard to get it back, not knowing how he broke your trust you need to be on your toes and think before making that decision. You will always care for someone but you need to trust them fully before haveing a relationship again. Good Luck!
2006-07-15 07:55:21 · answer #6 · answered by 9929 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sureeeeeeeely you should. Had he been hurting you that bad, trust me, you wouldn't have had luv for him.
Human is err, there is no harm in giving another chance. Be careful and dont give him all the liberty to reach to the point of doing any such mistake which might ruin the bond...
2006-07-15 07:56:03 · answer #7 · answered by AreAce 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really love him can you give him a second chance? Did he do something to not make you want him back? Its up to you. I don't know why you broke up in the first place so, I really can't help you. If he did something that you just can't forgive then no - don't go back its not worth it to sacrifice yourself. If its something petty, then why not? Let him make it up to you and see if he can be trustworthy. Good luck honey!
2006-07-15 07:54:25 · answer #8 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Any love has the potential for main too. Just have to except it if you want to play the love game.
Make him work to get you back. Ask him what he plans on doing.
He may be all talk and just wants your cookie again.
2006-07-15 07:51:56 · answer #9 · answered by sshazzam 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was in the same situation years ago & I did not go
back to the guy. I found someone MUCH better & I hear that the guy I left behind did NOT change, even though he
told me he would, they just say that to get you back.
Find a BETTER guy, yes they are out there !
2006-07-15 07:58:15 · answer #10 · answered by start 6-22-06 summer time Mom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. Work it out. Try your best. The more hurt you take in, the more hurt he will have for himself. He will eventually notice that he is dumb, for hurting you in the first place.
2006-07-15 07:55:38 · answer #11 · answered by Aracuse M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋