How can I teach my 4 year old son to wipe himself better?

Question

I'm a single mom with a 4 year old son. He always has poop in his underwear. He has been potty trained for over a year now. He doesn't wipe very well and tonight he pooped in his underwear several times. I don't know what to do anymore. I've wiped for him and shown him how to do it himself. Nothing seems to work. HELP

Answer 1

there is only sooo much you can do... try buying him flushable wipes... those will do more than help get all the poop, it will also clean...

one thing you can do that i know helped a friend of mine is, that you are going to have to embarrass him, or tell him its embarrasing. tell him he smells like poop and its disgusting, and that he is going to have to learn to clean himself correctly because you are scared that other kids will be able to smell it too, and that, that would be very embarrasing. or, tell a grownup, about his problem in front of him and this will cause him to feel embarrased. this should lead to him being more careful about things like this...

i knew a kid who didnt wipe right, and he was 10, so dont worry, 4 years old is not that bad... those flushable wipes are a good idea though... he'll at least be a little cleaner down there. good luck.

Answer 2

My husband and I have raised 3 kids. The best things I've seen on the market now are the wet wipes that are flushable. Especially the Kandoos. Because they are just for your little one to use and no one else. Teach him to wipe with them, using one at a time. Wipe again until there is nothing on the wipe. Then teach him to flush the toilet and wash his hands afterwards.
We took a piece of construction paper and put it on the fridge. Then we let our child (whichever one was training) pick out a toy from a toy catalog. We then cut it into however many pieces we thought it would take, in days or weeks, for the task to be accomplished. Then each day, or at the end of each week, if the child did well, they got to take the glue stick and glue a piece of the picture onto the paper. When the picture was complete we went to the toy store and bought the toy. It actually completed several tasks at once: (1) the child learned to do something (2) the child, also, learned early on how to work for things they wanted in a good way (3) if the item was rather expensive, it gave us time to set the money aside. We did this on many items.
It worked so well with our 2 boys that when they were 3 and 7 and their 1 year old sister was walking through the house, they started helping with potty training her via this system and she was completely potting trained at 17 months. Just be patient. It's completely normal for children to have accidents up to age 6.
Good Luck! I'll say a prayer for you!

Answer 3

It is quite normal for a 4 year old not to wipe himself properly.

It's not because he can control his bowels that he doesn't need help.

At the day care, they start between 4 and 5. If you started at 3 years old, maybe it was a little to early. Give him a break and do it for him without asking anything (no showing him how to do it, no "you're a big boy now", no sigh or showing of frustration - that is the toughest part).

You could start again in a couple weeks.

You don't have to be a perfect mother with a perfect child.
If the both of you feel less pressure, it could go a lot better.

Hang in there

Answer 4

Boys have these problems for some reason!!! But what helped me were the huggies flushable wipes! I have a pack in every bathroom, and as a matter of fact I give me a little baggie to take to school so that when he has the urge to go at school he can use those wipes to help him out, they have helped out A LOT!!!! And don't worry it will get better, just be patient and understanding, we are after all, the only teacher they have!!!!

Answer 5

Buy some of those flushable wet wipes and teach him to keep wiping until he doesn't see anything else on the wipes. If he's not sure, he could call for you to "check his work" too. Make sure that, if he is using a lot of flushable wipes or TP that he flushes more than once instead of filling the toilet up and backing up things too.

Answer 6

Slowly wipe him yourself to show him what exactly he is supposed to be wiping...i never had that problem with my kids, but it may work... also, try the flushable wet ones...they might help to make sure things are done...tell him to look at the paper and don't stop wiping until he doesn't see anymore nasty... I think alot may have to do with just not knowing exactly what happens when he poops and why and how to wipe.

Only suggestions...if you have done all this stuff...disregard!

Answer 7

My son is almost 5 and just about 20 minutes ago bent over in my face to show me his lovely poop filled butt crack. He thinks it is hilarious. He has wet wipes and they do help but more than half the time I just tell him to get in the shower and clean his butt with soap. I just tell him to wipe until the wet wipe comes out clean but it's just something they have to work at.

Answer 8

consider yourslef lucky. my four year says, "Mommy I have a surprise for you>" whenever she poops. But, I told her we need to practice for when she goes to school. This has worked pretty good. I tell her wipe once, look at the toilet paper, any poop? If yes, fold over and wipe again. Tell him to do this over and over again until the paper is clean. She does do a good job wiping when she wants to. It's frustrating huh?? Good luck

Answer 9

wow I am going through the same thing..my soon to be 4 y/o will not whip himself so we started a sticker chart. It is nothing fancy, a piece of paper on the wall with his name on it, when he goes #2 and whips himself he gets a sticker when he gets 3 stickers he gets a treat...so far he only has one sticker because we just started this a day ago...also get some of the flushable wipies because I think at their age the toliet paper is too hard for them to use and get clean. Good Luck

Answer 10

I would get some flushable wipes. That way they are a little wet to help the young lad out.