A blonde and her friend are having coffee Have ya heard this un?

Question

Two old friends are having coffee when the first, blonde, woman says, "I hear that you've been telling people that I'm ugly!" "Oh, no! I've just been saying that your new hairdo makes you look less attractive," says her blonde friend "I also heard that you've been calling me fat!" "Oh, no! I just said that the way you wear those stripes makes you look larger than you really are." "I also heard that you're saying that my husband has a wart on his d*ck!" The blonde says, "Oh, no! I only said that it feels like he has a wart on his d*ck!"

http://www.total-knowledge.com/~willyblues/

Note; I include the punch line, this is Jokes and Riddles, so nobody can say I had a pre-mature orgasm!

From; Willys Jokes archies!

Answer 1

Sailor walks into a psychiatrist's office with a pelican on his head. The doctor says, "Come right in, I can see you need my help right away." He leads the sailor into his office and settles him on the couch. "Now, tell me how this all began."

"Well Doc," says the pelican, "it started out as a wart on my ***!"

(One good wart deserves another!)

Answer 2

cdf!! lolz ok here's one for Willy's jokes archives :) cheers! thx for sharing ur jokes ! keep it up^^ :

What is 666?
That's the number of the beast.
And 668?
The next-door neighbor of the beast.
What's 666-point-00000?
That's the high-precision beast. And zero-point-666 is the Millibeast.
And 1-900-666-6666 is where you can call and talk to a beast, live, one-on-one.
And $665.95 is the retail price of the beast.
$699.25 with 5 percent sales tax.
$769.95 with all accessories.

Just for laughs whatever u place it :)
Hgday