What the parents should do ???

Question

When your teen runaway involved in drug, gang, drop out school, and had baby at 17 yrs old. Now living with boyfriend, have nothing to do.. no job, no driver license, no car, no GED. every day take her baby go to the parents house from 2pm-11pm to hang out with her younger sisters, then the parent take her home.
the parent tell her to join the youth center, they will help from a-z , but she does not listen to the parent....
- What a life?? no future ???
- what her parent should do or say???

any advise please ????
-Should the parent tell her not to come home if she does not listen???

Answer 1

The parents should tell her not to come because she is setting a bad example for her sisters! The parents have to worry about the kids that are still children, and make sure they don't have even the slightest opportunity to hang out with kids involved in gangs (like their sister) or kids with babies (like their sister), or kids who drop out of school (like their sister). For some reason little girls have a sort of hero worship for their older sisters, so they need to be kept away from her until she cleans up her life, and can tell them why her path was the wrong one! I'm not saying the parents can't help her, or see her, but just make sure that the sisters don't for a while. Also, explain what her life is like, and why it is a mistake to make those choices. Explain how she never knows if she is going to have food or diapers for the baby, and ask them what they think will happen if the father of the baby dies in a gang shooting? Who will take care of them then?

Answer 2

I think the first thought should be what life will that baby have with a mom who is more about the "hang out " the the time to grow up.....It was me about 13 years ago. I didn't drop out but i stayed in the hang out mode. My child get really sick, i and the baby ended up in a foster home....It was the best thing that ever happened to us. Maybe it was the fact that my foster mom was my toughest teacher to get along with( i knew nothing but thought i knew it all when it came to the baby ) or it was maybe it was the fact that she pointed that my social life ended the day i gave birth.....I respect her to this day for the love and long talks she gave me. With out her i would have never made it this far. So to answer the question, make her stand up, or the baby needs to be given a chance to have a caring and love stable home life....

Answer 3

It's called tough love. Apparently this girl thinks she has all the answers and seems to be doing what she wants irregardless of what others have been telling her. But mom and dad are enabling her by letting her come to the house and hang and helping her out, she is just expecting it. Hello, she has a baby, she is the grown up now and needs to start being the parent of her child. She has to want to get these things and mom and dad need to tell her, look you can come visit but not everyday and you have a man who should be taking care of you, and we are no longer going to do everything for you because you need to be a mom. We've raised you, we've done what we could for you and now you need to figure out what you are going to do for yourself. I know that you are worried about the baby she has, but you've got to make her understand that she needs to get it together if not for anyone else but that baby.

Answer 4

some times a parent has to let there child grow up and take responablity for her own like if this 17 yr cant step up to the plate and ask foir the help she needs than why schould her parents have to bail her out. she has a child and she needs to find a way to get a job , get her ged, and make a life for her and her child. now she has this child and that child schould come first. I fill the parents can help if they can but she has to help her self . she got in this now start from the bottom and move up.. I did it and a whole lot of my friends did the same we got in trouble not wanting our family running our lifes and ended up with a child and no real way to provide a stable life but we all did it.. good luck with every thing and keep your head up but after you make your bed you have to lay in it. your luck if you can move back in with parents to get on feet.

Answer 5

This is hard...but I would cut off the young parent as much as possible but of course do my best to make sure that the young baby is ok. The problem is that the parent cannot solve the problems for this out of control teen...creating temporary band aids of helping that young mother constantly while she parties more will only make her less responsible as she will not tie any responsibility of taking care of herself and child...let her drown in her problems...it will be hard but kids only learn when they fix their own problems..not when adults bear the burden of their bad mistakes for them

Answer 6

If she is involved with drugs you can take her to court and have them proved to be unfit parents and get custody of that poor child. What kind of future do you think that they will have. They will turn out just like your daughter, involved with drugs and end up having a baby young. You owe it to your grandchild to step in. You would basically be saving their life.

Answer 7

Where does she get money for herself and the baby? That might be the only cards the parents hold right now. If they're supporting them they still have some control and they should use it. When it comes to saving your children everything is fair.

Answer 8

Try to convince her to come back home and get her life back on track. Some kids do not learn until they fall hard enough and low enough to ask for help. Eventually, around age 25, kids realize how smart their parents have gotten over the years!

Answer 9

I would sit her down and tell her how much responsability a child is and (I know how hard this will be @ that age they don't like to listen, they think they know it all,lol) ask her if she honestly thinks she is handleing things well, and from what your saying she is def. not, and tell her that if she does not get her act straight, that you will have to step in, ie: take the baby and raise the child until she is ready to becaome mature, etc

Answer 10

This is a tough one. If she is encouraging the younger sisters to follow her footsteps, she should be told not to return until she has straightened out. If not I would say the parents should not give up on her.