Do you know how to mend a broken heart?

Question

I have recently been treated very badly by a so called gentleman from Norfolk, UK and just wanted to know how on earth some people can be so cruel, this guy put a committment ring on my finger in church on Christmas Eve (after we share Holy Communion) to prove his love for me, then three months later said he did not have time in his life for me, he was divorced but did have teenage children from his second marriage, this situation has really made me ill, and I am struggling to trust anyone, I hate this situation, can anyone help me get through this broken hearted situation and make me feel more positive about our fellow man

Answer 1

This is one guy, right? He lied to you, or changed his mind. Who knows what his motivations were. Maybe he has too much going on in his life. At least he came out and told you, right? So, what now? Hang out with friends. Don't look for relationships for a while. This is not what all guys are like; there are some great ones out there. You just got taken in by one of the losers. Some people are just cruel, & I've seen worse; consider yourself lucky he backed out before you were married! Don't give up, okay?

Answer 2

Men like that are not worth a second thought, I know that right now it is hard for you to see how you will ever get over this, but you will. The best way to get over a man is to find another man, although it doesn't sound as though you are ready to do that yet. I would suggest that you just go out with friends, have fun and while you are out if you see a guy who you think is cute or who is admiring you just flirt, it will make you feel better to know that someone is interested in you, but that doesn't mean that you have to date these men, just flirt around and that is it. Whatever you do, don't just sit around and cry over this man, do not feel sorry for yourself and keep yourself occupied, that will help keep your mind off of him and once you are able to stop thinking about him and what he did to you then you will start to see what else life has to offer and you will find someone to love. I wish you all of the luck in the world and hope that you are able to accept this advice with an open mind.

Answer 3

I think you have had a seriously narrow escape!

Thank your lucky stars you got away from this guy. It sounds trite, but time really does help. Don't be tempted to have any kind of contact with him - this guy sounds like he was using you for whatever reason. Don't fall for it a second time.

You have to believe that there are loads of good guys out there! Think about what you're looking for in a guy - make a list! Write down everything you want - from good kisser to likes cats. Now the important bit: Pick out the top 5 - 8 things you really can't do without - these are the deal-breakers! You may decide that honesty / committment are high on that list! When you meet a guy and go out with him see if he is ticking those top deal-breakers. If he is, he's a keeper. If not don't waste time - move on before you get too involved. You're only prolonging the pain.

I should add that the deal-breakers shouldn't be trivial - they are the must-haves in your relationship e.g. faithfulness, makes you laugh, wants the same things as you out of life, has never been married etc.

I mention the last one because not everyone can deal with a divorced man. There are loads of great guys and gals that are divorced out there, but be honest with yourself about whether you can handle ex-wives and children. I'm not doing this to get hate mail from angry divorcees but I went out with a great guy, divorced, young kid he was devoted to and a spectacularly bunny boiling ex who was happily in a new relationship of over a year but didn't want to see him happy with anyone. After 4 months of her poison, threatening to withold his access to child, and his total unwillingness to make compromises eg "one holiday a year? No way - I would miss contact with my kid!" I'm afraid I cut and run. I couldn't put someone else's child before my own life and dreams.

Keep dreaming! And look after yourself - treat your body right, don't neglect it while you nurse your broken heart. Being of good health and good cheer will help you carry on your search for your guy.

Answer 4

you have asked a similar question the Bee Gees did in a song: "How do you mend a broken heart? How do you end the rain from falling down? How do you end the sunlight from shining? What makes the international bypass around?" I first discovered to be honest approximately why the relationship did no longer paintings. I attempt to no longer concentration on what replaced into lost or what went incorrect. I remember the helpful. And forgive the unfavourable. I remember love is a gamble, and that i can in basic terms play the hand i've got been dealt. i do no longer assign blame, I alibi. I remind myself of the good characteristics, for the two one human beings. I set helpful targets, and paintings to realize them. Be helpful, no longer vindictive. And admit the blunders you have made. And assign blame to your self first. once you have finished berating your self you are able to initiate up on your ex. as a results of fact that that's no longer a technique to convey excitement on your heart you many times won't end. It took a pair of emotional beat downs for me to verify this, yet this does paintings

Answer 5

No woman deserves to be treated like that and no man is worth it..just consider yourself lucky to have found out the kind of person he really is.

Let all the hurt and pain go and wait a while and get ready for Mr. Right.

Answer 6

All men are not the same, doesn't help you feel much better now. It is a thought to hang on to though next time you meet someone you like.

Try and take things day by day and try not to trust someone too much in a relationship until you have got to know them well.

Answer 7

It will take time . . . a lot of self processing is needed. I've gone through several in my life. I gave myself time to mourn my lost . . . if I felt like crying I do.Denying what you're feeling will just make it worse. It helps to release the pain inside. What helped me that time is PRAYER . . . that is how I was able to get through it. The pain comes back from time to time . . . . but I dont let it linger . . . I accept its presence then move on with what I need to do.

Answer 8

Selflessness is the key to true love.

Research to determine that you agree on crucial issues when selecting someone for potential wedlock.

It may be some kind of karma thing. Karma is like the weather. Weather can be unpredictable. True love is eternal so you don't want to let that go.

Answer 9

It sounds like you met a real jerk. Do not allow him to "rent space" in your mind for another minute. Get busy. Do something for someone else. There are a lot of needy people in this world. When you are doing something for someone who really needs it, you will find that your troubles pale in comparison. You will find that you will receive far more than you give.

Answer 10

you can go out drinking but dont get drunk it always hurts worse in the morning. the best thing for it is time but it has a way of nearly killing you also the biggest problem is not having someone to listen to you to get it all out and then crying on thier shoulder telling you it will be alright good luck though p.s. if ya want to vent email me