I just learned that the guy I have bent myself out of shape over for 5 years has a new job and is leaving - I bet the bastard doesn't even say goodbye. I have learnt my lesson and will not put myself in this situation again. However I'll never be 'over' him - hes the ONLY person in my life I have even liked unreservedly let alone loved, everyone else are just strangers. I don't know how to cope with the ache of missing him and the endless 'what ifs' running through my mind, the fact that we never really got started means theres still so much unfinished business. What I want to know is if I now turn into a sl.ut and start screwing everyone in sight will that help? I don't expect to be happy, but if I can degrade myself enough so I can't feel anything any more, just dead inside, will that take the pain away? Did you try this - did it work?
2006-07-14 11:15:19 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
By the way if you want to know our past history check out my other questions, they are mostly about him.
2006-07-14 11:16:06 · update #1
Let me make it clear this is a one time deal. I loved no-one before him, I will love no-one after him. So this is a big deal, its my entire emotional life, for the rest of my natural life.
2006-07-14 11:44:21 · update #2
It is always tough to find out that someone you thought you were very close to turns out to be a complete flake. 5 years is a long time to invest in someone who ultimately picked a new job over you and your relationship. I take it that he has no desire to bring you with him. Maybe, given his ability to cast you aside, he was actually doing you a favor. Jerks like that will always be jerks. Be glad you found out now and not after another 5 years! Anyway, to address your specific question. You are hurting right now. Turning yourself into a total sl_t will temporarily take your mind off what is going on, but in the end, you will wind up with a whole new set of problems on top of the crummy feelings that you have now. My advice is to get out and date right away. Don't get serious and don't sleep with anyone on the first date. Getting out will show that there are people out there who want to be with you. Finding this out without sleeping with them right away, will help to weed out the creeps. Any decent guy will wait for sex, if he is truly interested in you. If you feel like you need sex, try calling up a friend and explain your situation to them. If you are totally honest and tell them you just need sex and not a relationship, it should work out OK. I have done this a few times and I get to enjoy the sex without getting a reputation as a sl_t.
Good luck and remember a year from now, I bet you will not even give this guy a second thought! Hang in there! :)
2006-07-14 11:57:16 · answer #1 · answered by funcd4play 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't do that. It may be hard to get over him but time will help.
It's not a good idea to sleep with everyone. There's too many diseases you can catch. The pain won't disappear when you sleep around. Talk about it with friend's,don't stay bottled up. Go do things with your friends. Stay busy it will help you keep your mind off him. Good Luck!!!
2006-07-14 11:33:16 · answer #2 · answered by lez23 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i imagine a damaged heart can heal, yet i do not imagine that it ought to ever be the way it became, before it became damaged. even as a heart receives damaged, it leaves a scar. the wound hurts before each and everything, yet over the years it heals. yet once you look decrease back on the scar, you bear in mind the soreness. and how a lot it damage. what mended my damaged heart became God. God let me go by potential of the soreness so i am going to learn. He needed me to believe in him. and that i believe him now. with all my heart. properly.. in case you do not position self belief in God, i imagine the perfect ingredient you should do is provide it time. God fastened my heart adequate so i should be quite satisfied, yet time can fix your heart in case you pick it to provide up hurting. yet quite, God fixing a heart is much better :)
2016-12-06 11:43:41 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not do that... Its not worth degrading yourself to the point... your heart will hurt for awhile, but eventually you will get over him... and you can start a new relationship
2006-07-14 11:23:49 · answer #4 · answered by V L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't do that, you'll regret it for the rest of your life. Have faith you'll meet someone else sooner than you think. Give it some time.
2006-07-14 11:25:35 · answer #5 · answered by justincase_65 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋