should u wait to tell your child when their older that their daddy is not their biological father?

Answer 1

unless thay see there biolagical father. y tell them at all it may just cause problam. has the daddy he has now been there since birth or near it if so than he is the daddy just cause he is not the biolagical father means nothing.. i have a step dad i my mom left my real father on june 28 1986 on my first bithday the exact day and i dont remember much about it. but my mom told me when i was like 5-6yrs old and i have been searching for my father since than and i am now 21 yrs old. there is never a good time to tell a kid that and if the daddy he has now is suporting u and the baby/kid well than id just leave well enough alone. especaly if ur kid does not know or remember there real dad. i know how it feels to be told that the dad u have now is not ur real dad i felt like my heart was ripped out and i was riped away form my step dad and never did get very close to him agine. i was always to busy looking for my read father

Answer 2

If you know then you need to tell the father first and then find the biological father and break it to the child. Still let the father that raised the child be involved in the child's life if he wants and pray the child can develop a bond with their father. Don't wait until the child is like 25 to tell them the truth because you would have cheated the man a role in his child's live.

Answer 3

Hell no... From experience they will hate you for not telling them sooner.. Kids look up to there parents for guidendce and if you teach them there whole life they can come to you for anything and ask you anything and teach them not to lie, then when they get older and you break the news to them, everything you have taught them and all the respect you earned is now shot out the window... You have now just told them that you have been lying to them there whole life and now they start to think about what else have you lied to them about and so on.. It becomes a big mess...

You do want to find the right time and talk it over with the acting father and come up with an actual game plan... Don't jump in feet first but use your head and try to think and say the right things.. Ease in to it imagine if it was you that is being told this and think about it from your childs point of view..

Hope this helps

Answer 4

In this day and age I wouldn't wait. And I wouldn't refer to whoever you call his daddy as their daddy. Not unless you're married to this man. If you are married, then I would let my child grow up always knowing that his biological dad and the man he's growing up with are two different people. And try to explain why. You don't have to give too much in details yet, but add more and more as he gets older. That way when your child is old enough to know the difference, it won't freak him out. It'll be what's always been normal.

Answer 5

Tell them now. There is no point in waiting as it will just create maximum hurt when the shocking truth emerges. Explain in a nice, age-appropriate way that they have two daddies and both love child very much and lightly go into the birds and bees explanation over why they have two daddies.

Answer 6

I guess it depends entirely on your circumstances. My oldest son was two when I met my husband. My husband is a great man and a few months into the relationship he told me my son had started calling him daddy. He wanted to make sure I was ok with it and I told him only if he was asking for the job. His family was really great about it too and they accepted my son as if he'd been there all along. When my son was 4 my SIL got remarried and his cousin now had two dads so he asked me if it was the same for him. I told him yes and he forgot about it for a while. Now that he is 9 he knows a little more about his 'real' dad, like his name and the city he lives in, but my husband is still his daddy. I have always promised him that if he ever wanted to meet him, I would let him.

Answer 7

It depends on the better interest of your child If you feel that it's okay the the real father want them in his life i would have been telling him/her from the beginning,on the other hand if you feel that he wasn't going to be a father maybe it's to your better interest not to tell at all. I've been through this My real dad wants nothing to do with me and my stepfather raised me so my girls know my stepfather as grandpa and not my biological father they have no idea who he even is.. hopefully that helped you get a little bit better understanding.

Answer 8

Yes. But keep this in mind- any man can donate sperm, it takes A REAL MAN to stay and be a daddy!!! When your child asks you should be truthful but I wouldn't be in a big hurry- as far as I can see, your child's father is the one they call daddy, the one who is there every day , rain or shine, the one who chooses to stay and be the father. Unless they are about to marry there brother/sister I wouldn't even bother to bring up the matter.

Answer 9

You should definitely tell your child. I would just wait until they are old enough to understand. Wouldn't you rather tell your child now and explain to them why their real father is not around and why the one that they have been calling daddy is. You wouldn't want to wait and then when they get to old they hold it against you.

Answer 10

Nope, tell them now. I know a VERY confused 14 year old Boy who was just told this summer that his father, (Whom he lives with) is not his Bio dad. He was the product of an affair. He knew his bio dad very well, but never knew he was his Dad until now. The poor KID is a TOTAL mess. He's mad at every one. The entire community knew about the affair, every one kept it quite, except for some kid who over heard his parents talking about it. Imagine the pain the 14 year old went through when a 12 year old told him his life was a lie. really bad deal. Do it NOW!