My 4 year old still doesn't sleep all night?

Question

She is the only child. I spoiled her with going to bed with her when she was younger. She wouldn't sleep without me. Now it's a little better, but she still gets up 2 or 3 times in the night crying for me to sleep with her. It's to the point where I have to set two alarm clocks- one in my room and the other in hers- because I never know where I'll end up. It's starting to wear me down- correction- it's been wearing me down. I have tried taking suggestions from Super Nanny- putting her to bed on her own. The first night, I counted 36 times getting up and putting her to bed. The next night was 18. I went to her Doctor and put her on nighttime meds to relax her to go to sleep. I just can't break her out of the getting up all hours of the night looking for moma.

Guys, I try putting her to bed. Before the colodine- (actually blood pressure med.) She would go back & forth for at least two to three hours. Trust me, I burn that tail, many many times. She freaks out- big time- it's like she's terrorfied to sleep, or be by herself

This child doesn't stop from the time she gets up in the morning- 6:30 a.m until I give her the sleep meds. She is a very active child. I work until 5:00 pm and I let her run outside until it's time to come in and take a bath at about 7:00. Her bed time is anywhere from 7:30 to 8:30. Anything later, I have hell trying to get her up in the morning. Before the meds- 11pm she would still be up.

Answer 1

This is sort of tough because all 4 of ours...including the 3 month old are sleeping throught the night and all did so at about 8 weeks.

Before you say...you just have good sleepers or you're lucky, I can tell you it was by design.

Some friends of ours had a child that slept through the night and would go to his bed on his own for his naps and we asked them what was going on. They told us about this course called "Prep for Parenting" It is based on the book "Baby Wise." We took the course and learned the keys to success. For babies, it is a eat, wake, sleep cycle. DO NOT LET THEM FALL ASLEEP WHILE EATING. You have to keep them awake somehow (take off the clothes, flick on the bottom of the foot, etc) You also have to feed every 3 hours or so, on a schedule. This helps their digestive system to develop proper digestion cycles as well as helps you to understand what they need if they are crying. If they ate one hour ago, you know it's not because they're hungry. If it has been 2 1/2 hours, they might be hungry. You absolutely do not let them snack. The reason you have to follow the cycle is that they learn to fall asleep on their own. If they require you to be feeding them, then they associate feeding with a prompt to fall asleep. Then when they wake up in the middle of the night, instead of being able to dose right back off to sleep, they need you to come feed them. (During the night time, you can allow them to feed and go right back to sleep.)

Now...for your problem...you'll need to put her down at a decent hour...like 8 or so. You have to be prepared for a few nights of frustration, but in the end, it will be worth it. If you get your sleep, you'll have much more patience as a parent and your child will get the rest that they need to grow healthily. You're going to have to not tolerate her getting up. Do not talk to her when she gets up, just take her back to her room immediately and put her down. If you get a tantrum, you'll need to spank so as not to reward the behavior. It is all about behavior modification.

This shouldn't come as a shock, but it does for most parents...She has been manuipulating your behavior for 4 years now. She gets what she wants when she gets up in the middle of the night, whether that is climbing in to bed with you, or getting to play, or just getting your attention. Do not reward her. That is why no talking and an immediate return to bed are so important. If you must spank, do it firmly, but in control. Also, explain why she's getting a spanking. You can even apologize to her for doing this wrong these few years, but you have to do this for her own good and yours. Supper Nanny doesn't condone the spanking, but it works, if you do it hard enough. You'll know if the cry changes from a protest cry to an "I'm sorry" cry. If you're persistent, you'll overcome this within a week guaranteed.

Also...4 year olds still needs a nap. Don't let her manipulate you. When it comes to her rest, you must be the parent. On the other hand, when it comes to finishing a plate, that is a different story...don't die on that battlefield. Make them try everything, but don't force them to overeat. Children stop when they've had enough and then we decide to tell them about all the starving children in China, so that they have to finish their plate. Why do we do these things?

Good luck

Answer 2

With our first daughter, we let her sleep with us. When she was 3, we decided we really needed to correct this situation, so I did a few things. First, I went out and bought her a new bed and new bedding and pillows in her favorite color. They were soft, comfy and she loved them. She was so excited to sleep in her "own" bed when I brought all that home, I could hardly believe it.

For the first few nights, I slept in another bed in her room so she would get used to it. Then, for the next few nights, I slept in there but made sure I got up before her in the morning (so I wouldn't be there in the morning and she would come find me in my room and she knew everything was okay). After all that, she was fine sleeping in her room by herself.

It just takes some time and patience. Try to find something you think will interest your daughter and make her want to sleep in her own room. When my daughter thinks things are her own idea, she is much more likely to do it. So, don't pressure her, give her a reason to WANT to sleep in her own room and let her think it was her idea.

I can't agree with these people that want you to make her tough it out. Okay, maybe she is manipulating you, but it's only because she is scared of sleeping by herself or something like that. When children are scared they need the comfort of their parents - not tough love.

Although I don't have 4 children like the tough love guy, I do have 2 and they both slept through the night by 12 weeks and 8 weeks respectively. The first one took a little longer because she was a premie. Anyway, they are great sleepers too and I didn't spank them or just let them cry it out. So, don't feel like you have to do those thing either. There is a way....just figure out what appeals most to your daughter and what will work for your family.

Answer 3

You must get her on a schedule! During the day, take her to the park until she is worn out. Do not give hr a nap until bedtime! Guaranteed she will be too exhausted to get up durng the night- she will be sound asleep. Don't take her to the park until the aftrnoon, like 5 or 6. Stay and play for a few hours. Trust me.

Answer 4

I had that problem also with my kids. I got this linen spray from Bath and Body I think its called Tranquil Sleep. You spray a mist on there sheets and pillow about 10-15 mins before the go to bed. The fragrance helps them get to sleep and helps them from having nightmares. I always told my kids its time for night night spray. Kinda made a game of it they loved it.

Answer 5

its normal for kids to be sensitive and u should enjoy the fact that she has someone she feels confortable with. You can't expect her to magically be all brave and stuff. Stuff like this takes time. You have to tell her to stop scaring herself and think about happier thoughts. A better idea would be to tell her a story till she sleeps. If she has a problem with nightmares you have to make her feel more reasurring. Tell her that nothings going to ever hurt her as long as big daddy's around and tell her that there really is no such thing as ghost. Make up anything to make her feel like its silly. I had this problem when i was a kid. My dad would always tell me scary stories and even know i always feel like somethings lurking in the dark sometimes. It wasn't till 8th grade till i started going to the bathroom at night instead of peeing in a bottle. But seriously you have to tell her to keep her door opened and that when ever she felt scared let her know that nothing would ever harm her and that you love her very much. Tell her to be brave for you even if it sounds corny.
Treat your daughter very well and protect her as much as you can.

" Nothing in this world is more innocent than a baby girl"

Answer 6

I agree...consistancy is key to rules and discipline working with kids. The Super Nanny is actually right on with her advice and techniques.

Just remember, for each time you give in, your child will redouble their efforts the next time you try not to give in. I know it's wearing you down more and more, but if you stay consistant, it will take less time to get there.

Patience to you.

Answer 7

i experenced the same, what tried laying in her bed till she fell asleep. than put a big stuffed animal toy buy her to make her think its your body next to her. and dont give her any thing sweet a few hours before bed. good luck.

Answer 8

you need to put her to bed and make her stya there. i did that and it too a couple of days but she stayed own, she will eventually get tired of you carying her back to bed that she will just end up staying in her own bed.it is not going ot work in one night, it takes days.good luck.

Answer 9

If she gets up, pop her tail. If she gets up again, pop her tail. It will take persistance, but it DOES work. Your first two nights will be hell, but you can live through it.

Answer 10

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