Basically, this guy is 40 and married with kids (lecturer in a university I work at). About 6 months ago he used to ALWAYS stare at me - Ive caught him MANy times just staring at me. He even carried on staring at me when I looked up at him.
This gradually subsided, even though I caught him staring at me still while I wasnt looking then he turned away when I looked up.
Now..he just completely blanks me...and I have given him no indication that I like him. When I walk past him..its like im invisible to him and he doesnt even say 'hi' anymore.
Why does he do that. From what I know of him - he is shy and sensitive natured but confident in speech (as hes a lecturer).
Should I show him that I am interested in him? Or is it too late?
I am 24 and have a Degree. I work at the University at the Same Department as him and I will also be studying for an MBA part-time while Im working and he is NOT my teacher/lecturer.
2006-07-14 07:41:57 · 54 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You know he's married and has kids, so there's no future in the relationship, only maybe fun, if you like that kind of fun.
If he's not loyal to his present wife and kids and leaves them for you, what are the chances that he'll remain loyal to you?
And if he wants you only for fun, and you are open for that, then maybe go ahead and play with fire!
Any case, whatever you do, all the best in life!
st
2006-07-17 04:20:26 · answer #1 · answered by Starreply 6 · 11⤊ 1⤋
How could you be interested in him? Thats just plain bad. I answered this question already on the other post, and NO you should not tell him...how could it be too late when you should never do it at any time at all. I am not judging you for having feelings, but if you act on them you will be ruining his life. He has a wife, family, secure job- and a 24 yr old can come and steal all that away from him and odds are against it ever working out. You say that you are not his student as if that makes a difference. The media will be all over it, his career would be jeopardized because it is unethical to do that with any student at your place of work...especially since he is married. I shiver at the thought of what you are thinking of doing....just dont do it, consider it too late, and that you two can never be, leave him be for his own sake and happiness. You just focus on school and if a man your age comes along who is single you will see how much better it will be because you can actually go for it...bring him around your friends, family...bet you didnt think about all that. Brining a 40 year old lecturer home and hiding the fact that he is married, or did you think it would just be a fling and he would never meet any of your friends or family? THINK WOMAN THINK!
2006-07-14 11:51:44 · answer #2 · answered by missesbean 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ok, this is my opinion, so take it as just that: an opinion
You are 24 and have your life ahead of you, while this guy is 40 (nearly double your age): maybe he stopped doing the things he did because hes realised the tension between the two of you and does not want to lose the wonderful life he already has (kids, wife etc)...
But that doesnt mean that you two shouldnt communicate at all: you can become friends and discuss work related issues, since you will be in the eys of each other most of the time, being in the same department !
OR MAYBE: he was just admiring your beauty and does not want to get serious with you. I dont think you should be interested in him...he's married!! im sure there are others out there for you
2006-07-14 07:49:35 · answer #3 · answered by Angel_like 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't even consider this guy as someone you could be interested in. The guy is married and has kids, If he left his wife and kids to be with you how long do you think he'll stay with you until he finds his next proximity infatuation. Why would you be attracted to a married man that stares at you all the time anyway, a shy one, that wouldn't turn away when you look at him. He sounds kind of creepy actually.
2006-07-14 07:53:26 · answer #4 · answered by Agnostic 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It could be because he's married why hes ignoring you now. At the time that he was starring at you, he may have been having marital problems or something, or he just stopped because of the guilt he feels. If he's married with kids i wouldn't persue anything more then a friendship. Just say hi how are you the next time you see him and try to start a friendly conversation either about work or sports or something you know that hes interested in. just go with the flow.
2016-03-27 05:17:27 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him alone. He's married and has kids. Whatever his reasons for staring at you so many months ago, at this time he does not want to have anything to do with you.
Perhaps he was staring at you because he felt that you were always looking at him and at the time he was asking the same type of questions that you are now.
You should concentrate on your life... find a young man to enjoy your life with. Go out with your girlfriends, and live other women's husbands alone.
2006-07-14 07:49:25 · answer #6 · answered by smazedmi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the guy is married and have kids, why would you even bother? Maybe he has gotten over his infatuation with you, or he has found someone else. Whatever the reason, it really not worth it. At 24, you are doing extemely well. Continue to grow and succeed .. you are on the right track, this relationship can only be excess baggage.
2006-07-14 07:50:19 · answer #7 · answered by La Diva 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Umm....... you said he's married!!! He is probably really thinking about it. And if he looks at you one more time he'll explode. You'll do what you want no matter what anyone says. We always want what we can't (or should't) have. So, when you corner him, just do him once........for the sake of the family. If you persist nothing good is usually the result. Take your cake, eat then find some other desert. Or you can always write erotic stories from the fantasies you have. It's safer that way and you can publish them for extra money.
2006-07-14 07:53:10 · answer #8 · answered by Jerry S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A bigger question is do you want to be involved with a man who is married with kids? That's a train wreck waiting to happen. Are you willing to be this guys second woman? You are obviously a smart girl. I would suggest finding someone who is single and goal oriented, such as yourself and not a man who would cheat on his wife and not considered the feelings of his children. If he took you up on your advances, then that's what you would get, a self centered man who cares not for the feelings of his family. I would hope that your not trying to get his attention only because now he doesn't give it freely. Please rethink this decision .
2006-07-14 07:47:49 · answer #9 · answered by The Kings 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He could be a guy who thinks a lot. Some people aspecially smart people that are leaders in work often think about there job and plane what they would do next at work thinking it over. When he stares he's probalby thinking. Right now he could be really thinking about something big.
2006-07-14 07:47:07 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's married with kids, perhaps he's trying to get over his feelings for you. You haven't mentioned that you have feelings for him at all, just that he was staring at you. My advice to you is let him do what he needs to do, and you start looking for a guy who's not already in a committed relationship!
2006-07-14 07:47:03 · answer #11 · answered by dukefan86 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋