do u think this is funny ?

Question

> A Polish man moved to the USA and married an American girl.
Although

> his English was far from perfect, they got along very well until
one

> day he rushed into a lawyer's office and asked him if he could
arrange
> a divorce for him - very quick."
>
> The lawyer said that the speed for getting a divorce would depend
on

> the circumstances, and asked him the following questions:
>
> LAWYER: "Have you any grounds?"
> POLE: "JA, JA, acre and half and nice little home."
>
> LAWYER: "No," I mean what is the foundation of this case?"
> POLE: "It made of concrete."
>
> LAWYER: "Does either of you have a real grudge?"
> POLE: "No, we have carport, and not need one."
>
> LAWYER: "I mean, What are your relations like?"
> POLE: "All my relations still in Poland."
>
> LAWYER: "Is there any infidelity in your marriage?"
> POLE: "Ja, we have hi-fidelity stereo set and good DVD player."
>
> LAWYER: "Does your wife beat you up?"
> POLE: "No, I always up before her."
>
> LAWYER: "Is your wife a ******?"
> POLE: "No, she white."
>
> LAWYER: "WHY do you want this divorce?"
> POLE: "She going to kill me."
>
> LAWYER: "What makes you think that?"
> POLE: "I got proof."
>
> LAWYER: "What kind of proof?"
> POLE: "She going to poison me. She buy a bottle at drugstore and
put

> on shelf in bathroom. I can read, and it say, 'Polish Remover'."
>

Answer 1

ROFL, i heard a different version of this before and i have to admit this really funnier than the other... hahaha.....i really laughed...

thank you.........10/10

Answer 2

That's a good one

Answer 3

Not bad.What are the two most common lies in Poland?The check's in your mouth and I won't come in the mail.

Answer 4

yes very. where did u get it?

what about this one?

In case your frustration level rises today, this is for everyone
who occasionally has a really bad day when you just need to take
it out on someone:

I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a telephone call that
I had to make. I found the number and dialed it. A man answered
nicely saying, "Hello?"

I politely said, "This is Patrick Hanifin and may I please speak
to Robin Carter?" Suddenly the phone was slammed down on me! I
couldn't believe that anyone could be that rude. I tracked down
Robin's correct number and called her. She had transposed the
last two digits.

After I hung up with Robin, I spotted the wrong number still
laying on my desk. I decided to call it again. When the same
person once more answered, I yelled, "You're a jackass!" and
hung up. Next to his phone number I wrote the word "jackass" and
put it in my desk drawer. Every couple of weeks when I was
paying bills or had a really bad day, I'd call him up. He would
answer and I'd yell, "You're a jackass!" It always cheered me up.

Later in the year the phone company introduced caller ID. This
was a real disappointment for me. I would have to stop calling
the jackass. Then one day I had an idea. I dialed his number and
heard his voice. "Hello?"

I made up a name. "Hi. This is the sales office of the telephone
company and I'm just calling to see if you're familiar with our
new caller ID program." He answered, "No!" and slammed down the
receiver. I quickly called him back and said, "That's because
you're a jackass!"

The reason I'm taking the time to tell you this story is to show
you how if there's ever anything bothering you, you can do
something about it. Just dial 555-1212.

(Keep reading, it gets better.)

One day an old lady at the mall was really taking her time
pulling out of her parking space. I didn't think she was ever
going to leave. Finally, her car began to move ever so slowly
and she began backing out. I backed up a little more to give her
plenty of room. Great, I thought, she's finally leaving. All of
a sudden this black Camero came flying up the parking aisle in
the wrong direction and pulled into her space. I started honking
my horn and yelling, "You can't do that, buddy! I was here
first!"

The guy got out of his Camero completely ignoring me. He walked
toward the mall as if he didn't even hear me. I thought to
myself, this guy is a jackass. There sure are a lot of jackasses
in this world. I noticed he had a "For Sale" sign in the back
window of his car. I wrote down the number. Then I hunted for
another place to park.

The next day I was at home sitting at my desk. I had just gotten
off the phone after calling 555-1212 and yelling, "You're a
jackass!" (It's really easy to call him now since I have his
number on speed dial.) Then I noticed the phone number of the
guy with the black Camaro and decided to call him too. After a
couple of rings someone answered the phone. I asked, "Are you
the man with the black Camaro for sale?"

"Yes."

"Can you tell me where I can see it?"

"Yes, I live at 1802 West 34th Street. It's a yellow house and
the car is parked right out front."

I asked, "What's your name?"

"My name is Don Hansen."

"When's a good time to catch you, Don?"

"I'm home in the evenings."

"Listen, Don, can I tell you something?"

"Sure."

"Don, you're a jackass!" And I slammed the phone down.

After I hung up I added Don's number to my speed dialer. Now I
had two jackasses to call whenever I had a bad day. However this
wasn't as much fun as it used to be. So I thought about it and
came up with a solution.

First, I had my phone dial jackass #1. The man answered nicely
and I yelled, "You're a jackass!" But I didn't hang up.

The jackass said, "Are you still there?"

I said, "Yeah."

He said, "Stop calling me."

I said, "No!"

He said, "What's your name, pal?"

I said, "Don Hansen."

He said, "Where do you live?"

"1802 West 34th Street. It's a yellow house and my black Camaro
is parked out front."

"I'm coming over right now, Don. You'd better start saying your
prayers."

"Yeah, like I'm really scared, Jackass!" And I hung up.

Then I called Jackass #2. He answered, "Hello."

I said, "Hello, jackass!"

He said, "If I ever find out who you are..."

"You'll what?"

"I'll kick your butt."

"Well, here's your chance. I'm coming over right now, jackass!"

And I hung up. Then I picked up the phone and called the police.
I told them I was at 1802 West 34th Street and that I was going
to kill my gay lover as soon as he got home. Another quick call
to Channel 13 news about the gang war going down on West 34th
Street. After that I climbed into my car and headed over to 34th
Street to watch the whole thing. Glorious!

I watched two jackasses kicking the crap out of each other in
front of 6 squad cars and a police helicopter I also taped it
off the evening news!



i loved this joke hop u do too

Answer 5

ya , that was funny..... hehe
how abt this one:

Q. Why do men pay more for car insurance?
A. Women don't get blow jobs while they're driving

Answer 6

perfect joke100/10

Answer 7

As much as I HATE to admit this, yes, it's funny!

haha

Answer 8

funny in a cute way

Answer 9

haah i love it :D.. .course it might be a bit degrating to the polish... but i think its cute

Answer 10

thats pretty funny cause im polish, lol