I have a problem ( Guys only)?

Question

Everytime my boyfriend goes somewhere with his friends I get kind of insecure and have these bad thoughts about him cheating on me. ( He doesn't seem like the type.) He's kind, charming, responsible, and just the perfect guy. When he gets home, he calls me and then I start to act like a real b***. What am I supposed to do. Guys please help me out. I have tried to talk to my boyfriend about and he says to solve the problem he will stop going out with his friends. I don't want him to do that. So what am I supposed to do? My friends say I treat him like he is my child.

Answer 1

i think you might be confusing him with a past boyfriend and now you just don't trust guys to much . when he goes out with his friends and u r sitting around thinking if he cheating on you just change your thoughts and think of something else instead of thinking of way he might be cheating

Answer 2

I agree with your friends, sounds like maybe you have control isssues or something. And i know for sure you have trust issues, if you say hes perfect but your scared when hes out with his guy friends that he will cheat...even tho you know he isnt the type, you got big trust issues. What you should do ..is tell him you want him to still hang out with him, but it would be so much easyer on you if he could maybe call you and you two just say hey, ask what hes up to..etc. Maybe that will ease your mind. But in the end what you have to do is stop being a ***** to him for hanging out with his friends, and stop being so over bearing and start trusting, if you dont...you either might lose him, or you will just make your lives togather miserable.

Answer 3

Wow.

You must be a little insecure.

Consider this - If he wanted to be with someone else, he would be. Of all the millions of women in the world, he's chosen to be with you, to trust you, to share his time with you...and you don't want to believe in him?

If he's good about sharing time with you and his friends (honestly, you should be getting more of his time than his friends...if he spends more time with you than with them, that's a good thing...but he should be able to hang out with his pals sometimes too) you have nothing to worry about.

Please - relax. Maybe you could go spend some time with your friends when he spends time with his. It'd keep your mind occupied while he's out and it'd also give both of you something fun to talk about when you see each other later.

Have you ever cheated on someone before? Could it possibly be that you're worried about his cheating because you've done it yourself?

I dont' know about you, but I've seen in my life that cheaters are the most worried about getting cheated on.

Work to build trust with this good man. Appreciate how good he is and know that if you try your hardest to be a good woman, there will never be any reason to doubt him. If he's working hard to be a good man to you, and you work just as hard to be a good woman, you two will build trust together.

My wife and I trust each other completely, and thoughts of insecurity just aren't part of the plan. We are a team, and we work together toward common goals. There's no reason or purpose for doubting each other.

Try trusting him. It sounds like he's earned your trust and respect, so give it to him.

Answer 4

Well, you kinda treat him like a child. Maybe you guys don't hang-out as often as he hangs out with his friends. Spend time together, hang-out, and have some talk time with each other. You can't assume things happen, if you feel insecure, why don't you do a little snooping yourself? Just don't let 'em know. Don't erupt in anger too early. Try listening to his side. And besides, you said he was willing to compromise. But of course, you don't want to ruin his peers' relationship with him, right?

Just spend more time together, and trust each other.
Good luck with that!

Answer 5

Thats it you said it yourself, if he is what you say he is then let it be. Meaning this guy has never given you a reason to beleive that he is doing or has done anything wrong then you should trust him and keep this good man that you have. My girlfriend does the same thing to me. I tell her that if she can't trust me then we don't need to be together. Trust and honesty are very big for me and if we can't do any of the two then we need to be alone. You are playing games and that will lead to someone's feelings being hurt, and we don't want that right! Treat him the way you would like to be treated!
Good luck to you and you relationship!

Answer 6

insecurity and emotional dependency are popular problems with us humans. and many of us don't ever bother dealing with their causes. if they are left undealt with they will very negatively effect your life: fear, drama, etc. it is best to try to understand where these "emotions" come from, then you can decide on a plan to deal with them. simply put, your brain comes up with a thought(s)...he's probably with someone else, probably because i'm really worthless and he's figured that out... what will i do if he leaves me...i'll be alone forever... then the emotion of fear arises generated by these thoughts, etc--- sound familiar?you get the picture. how to overcome all of this. you must work on understanding how the process works, and how to overcome it. you will be amazed at the difference, and then you will be "free". to understand the process: read *the complete idiot"s guide to toltec wisdom*. to overcome it: do the practices discussed in the book plus other "energy work" to untie the "knots in your energy field"---yoga, reiki, tai chi, regular exercise, generally. also, check out www.sahajayoga.com for some tips. you will have to have discipline and commitment. the alternative is very unpleasant, i assure you. best of luck p.s. (if you just rely on friends' advice , etc. you will just be "doing drama"--that only perpetuates the problem) do the "work".

Answer 7

your very insecure about yourself. you need to find out why your so insecure. i mean really get down to the core of it and try to fix it. you need to be complete in yourself long before you take on a b-friend but since you do have a b-friend your going to need to figure this out soon. and i don't care how great a guy is to being understanding enough of this to stop hanging out w/ the boys and so-on. he will eventually start to pitty you and grow tired of you, he will leave. I'm sorry but that's how it is

Answer 8

you better chill out or he will dump you asss. If you keep nagging him, it will make it worse and he may hook up with another chick just because he is sick of hearing you say those thing. If you have a good relationship, he will be true to you. He sounds like a good guy, calling you when he is home. Guys need to go out with the guys. Relax

Answer 9

Realize that he is much too goof for you and you don't deserve him.

And he is just one accusation/attitude away from dumping your sorry a** forever. No matter what he says, nothing drives guys away like stupid jealous accusations.

So just keep it up and don't change anything. Soon enough, this problem will solve itself. (Of course then you'll have a new problem, but that's ok. You'll just post another question.)

Answer 10

You need to trust your bf until you have reason not to trust him. The route you are going you have the possibility of making him want to break up with you. The key to any relationship is trust. So trust him till he proves differently.