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my ex. bf and i were thinking about getting married and got a lisecense and went to a judge does it still count even though we did not do it in a church does it still count? i thought it was just practise and am worried i am pregnant w/ his kids and he did seem bent on as he said taking me off the market?he is grounded for three days so i cant talk to him. we are both 18 and starting college so we are somewhat mature!

2006-07-14 05:15:17 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships Singles & Dating

i am catholic so it would have to be in church right?

2006-07-14 05:18:16 · update #1

i spilled coffee on it

2006-07-14 05:20:32 · update #2

do i need to talk to a lawyer he is grounded for drinking and staying out late.

2006-07-14 05:22:14 · update #3

i am 4 months pregnant ith twins boy and girl my grandparents will be taking care of them for most part till i finish school

2006-07-14 05:38:07 · update #4

26 answers

You don't have to do it in a church to be married. Judges marry people all the time.

2006-07-14 05:20:12 · answer #1 · answered by kilala_1977 2 · 1 1

You are absolutely married- the fact that you're Catholic has no bearing on the legal ramifications (separation of church and state and all that). The Catholic Church might not recognize a civil marriage and allow you to receive an annulment (although if you are pregnant that doesn't seem very likely as it's obvious you've consummated the relationship).

And again, no, it doesn't matter that the marriage license or certificate has been damaged. If your house were to burn down, taking the marriage certificate with it, you would still be married.

The thing that counts is that the certificate was filed with the county clerk. If you got a marriage license, went before a judge, agreed to the contract, and the judge then filed it with the county clerk- you are married. It doesn't matter that you didn't have a "church wedding", as that is not a requirement for a legal union.

You need to resolve this, and may need a lawyer to do it. If you are pregnant, the fact that you are married means that your husband (get used to that word) will probably have more rights in the children's interests than if you were not. Also, if you don't resolve this with a divorce and marry again, then you will be guilty of bigamy, and possibly some sort of falsification of a document (since the marriage license asks if you've ever been married or are currently married).

It sounds like you're both living with your parents at the moment, but that won't affect your status. It will however mean that the two of you probably wont have any community property to devide up. Since you ARE pregnant, and the grandparents will presumably be taking care of the childre, then this may be a messy divorce. The court will appoint a guardian ad litem (an attorney for the children), and your grandparents may end up needing/wanting an attorney as well. Be aware, in this situation, if you divorce your husband and turn over the childrearing to your grandparents, it is EXTREMELY likely that you will have custody taken away from you and your grandparents given full custody, essentially shutting you out of your childrens lives. This is a VERY serious matter, and you need to discuss it with your parents, your grandparents, your husband, and his family. If you all get along, then go in a group if the lawyer will let you. Otherwise, set up a time for you and your husband to meet with a family law lawyer individually.

Good luck- this is going to be a messy case.

2006-07-14 12:33:55 · answer #2 · answered by brodyburks 4 · 0 0

Yes, you're married. You're bound into what is known as an "informal" marriage. I.E., you have a license and all but you were not married in a church. Depending on where you live, you might be able to seek an annulment based on the fact that though, you're eighteen, you were not thinking clearly and that somehow you were unduly influenced. If you want to stay married well then, congratulations on your child and your husband. LOL at the whole "he's 18 and grounded" thing.

2006-07-14 12:26:14 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

If you went to the judge and have a signed marriage license, then you are married. People get married like that all the time, when they don't want the whole wedding thing. You might want to go talk to someone about this. Just for the record you don't sound that mature, if you thought you were practicing getting married and might be pregnant. Not to be mean, just stating the facts.

2006-07-14 12:19:44 · answer #4 · answered by Mustang L 3 · 0 0

He isnt your ex bf, he's your husband all right! Being Catholic only means you COULD have done it in a church. I am Catholic and divorced and gettting remarried. I will not be doing it in a church as I would have to have gotten an anullment from the church, so this time will be a civil ceremony, where we got the license and go do it, but it will be as legally binding as my first wedding.

Congrats! Now go to his house and demand your husband, he belongs to you now, not his parents, so YOU ground him if you want to.

2006-07-14 12:29:20 · answer #5 · answered by Yote' 5 · 0 0

If you went in front of a judge and said the I DO's then yes you are married. You don't have to get married in a church. My husband and I had an outside wedding.

2006-07-14 12:19:14 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

If you got a licence and went to a Judge or JP, then you are married.

How can you say you're mature if you don't even know that?

Why is he 18 years old and grounded? That's odd!

2006-07-14 12:20:30 · answer #7 · answered by Cheryl K 4 · 0 0

Its a legally binding marriage if you stood in front of a judge and signed the license..and you obviously aren't that mature if he still gets grounded....

But yes..you are married..the ceremony is just for show.

2006-07-14 12:20:43 · answer #8 · answered by Bevin M 3 · 0 0

As long as there was a justice of the peace you are married. There doesn't have to be a church or even a minister or priest. You might want to inform your parents of the situation so as you can get it resolved if you don't want to be married or were incoherent at the time of the nuptials.

2006-07-14 12:21:58 · answer #9 · answered by BbyGrl80 4 · 0 0

You got a license, went before a judge of peace who pronounced you husband and wife. This makes it legal, in all 50 states, and overseas(basically world wide). If you are in doubt you can check public records of the place where you went in your county and see if you and he are listed as having gotten married. In any case, you or he should have gotten a marriage degree, a legal document stating your and his name, the date of marriage, where you got married---so go about asking him first, if negative, check the public records which can be checked via the computer. Checking public records does not cost anything.(Check in your county/state).Good Luck

2006-07-14 12:37:13 · answer #10 · answered by MARIANNE G 4 · 0 0

If you have a license and a judge, did you have witnesses? You're married. Just because you're 18 and going to college, doesn't mean that you're even sumewhat mature.

2006-07-14 12:22:33 · answer #11 · answered by daca_moracca 3 · 0 0

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