For someone who is focused only on the gifts?

Question

for her wedding, what should I get her, and how much is too much to spend?

Answer 1

maybe she's getting married for the wrong reason

Answer 2

Well, I don't think there is "too much" that you can spend on a wedding. Even in most cases I don't think there is a "too little" either. You seem to think that she is focused only on the gifts - let me tell you, as a bride every once in awhile it's hard not to get that way. For about two months I was getting presents every single day and it was really difficult not to get wrapped up in it.

But she's probably not completely and only focused on that. She is most likely caught up in the moment but not necessarily just a materialistic person. I only say that because it kind of seems like you're a little unhappy with the importance she seems to place on gifts. I think it's probably best to spend the same amount on a gift that you would even if she had never mentioned it - you shouldn't spend more just because she seems focused on it.

As for how much to spend, that's anyone's guess. I went to a wedding where the groom's uncle gave them a $10 bill, and at my own wedding a couple of relatives gave us $1000 (my husband has some insanely generous relatives). The average gift we got from friends of ours was around $50-80. That may seem low to some people but all of my friends are early-mid 20s and just don't have a lot of money! Do what you can and buy a gift that you want to give and I'm sure she'll appreciate the thought and not just the gift.

Answer 3

If the bride is only focused on the gifts... *shakes head* There is so much more to this... how about a lifetime of MARRIAGE??

My personal guidelines about wedding gifts are pretty constant. If the couple has a registry, I check it out cuz I know it's stuff they'll want. I never spend more than I can afford, and if buying something that isn't on their list, I put some thought into it. In terms of dollars, I have a very limited budget, so I tend to spend around $50. If anyone is going to judge me on the cost of my gift, I don't think they are really worth knowing.

Answer 4

Cash is really the best gift for a wedding. However, if she is obsessed with getting everything on her registry, here is one way to go about it:

1. Determine the amount to spend based on a)are you going alone or with a spouse/date; b)how close you are to the bride;
c)how fancy the reception is (the "unofficial" rule of thumb is to have the gift "cover" the cost of your meal); d)what you can afford.

2. Take that amount, say $100, and review the registry. Look for either one big thing or two smaller things. For example, what about high-threadcount sheets? This is a great gift and practical too. Or maybe she wants a hi-tech coffee maker. Get the machine, a pound of Starbucks coffee, and his/her mugs! Or get a gift card to her favorite store. A gift like this means they'll always remember you, too. I still have the set of mixing bowls and cookbook (another great idea) I received as a shower gift 17 years ago, and I still think fondly of the family member who gave them to me!

3. Consider dropping the gift off at her mother's house or shipping it to the happy couple. Don't bring a gift to the wedding reception. It is just another thing to carry, another thing to get lost. Have it shipped with a gift receipt, just in case.

4. Try not to hate the bride because she seems "focused on the gifts." Today it seems like every wedding is a contest to see which bride can outdo another; silly really. Have fun at the wedding!

Peace.

Answer 5

Well it depends if you are trying to impress her or teach her that life is more about the marriage she'll live through rather than the wedding ceremony and gifts?

If you are trying to impress her, nothing is too much to spend. Whatever your budget allows, spend that much and make it as glamorous as possible.

If you are trying to teach her, yet give her a gift, then make her something rather than buy something. You could do some kind of craft that reflects her likes or symbolizes the union she's entering into (though if she's shallow the gift might outlast the marriage). Keep in mind, if she's all about the gifts, she won't see the value of a gift made by your hands, so you may have to explain it to her or put some kind of note in with it.

Good luck, whatever you choose to do.

Answer 6

This always depends upon your relationship - your own circumstances will dictate the amount to spend. I concentrate on matching the gift to the couple, the amount then doesn't matter. If the bride is really focused on the gifts as you say, I'm sure she's registered for gifts, so get something simple off of there.

Answer 7

The tried and true gift certificate to any place she is registered at could be your best bet. I love gift certificates...while some may find it impersonal, I love receiving them, because you can get whatever you want with them! Plus, you just stick it in the card, write a note, and hey, you don't have to haul a RICE COOKER to the reception! :-) Only spend what is within your means, and if she is a true friend, she will not care about the amount you spent, only that the thought was there.

Answer 8

Is she going on a honeymoon? You could offer her a gift of setting up a honeymoon registry and manage it for her. You can pass out the information to her family and friends and they can add upgrades to their honeymoon as well as add things like candlelight dinners and spa treatments. There is no cost out of your pocket and you take the stress off of her of managing it. You can also set up a free wedding website. Your friend will love the fact that you took time out of your busy schedule to make sure she has a really special honeymoon. Please visit http://www.ytbtravel.com/godsgirl2travel once on the page click on the book travel link, then select the extra tab at the top of the page and go to honeymoon registry. You can set up everything there and just get a list of the wedding guest from her and send out the info...Sometimes its the free things in life that we do for others that is the most special gift.

Answer 9

Personally I think that she is just being materialistic. It's supposed to be about spending the rest of her life with the guy that she loves and not how many gifts she's getting or what they cost. Being me I would get her what she's going to need and that 's all to it.

Answer 10

Find out where she is registered and get her something off of her list of things. Only spend what you feel comfortable with. Don't overspend just b/c she is counting on the gift.

Answer 11

Is this person with you for the money only? I say you should not get them anything. Leave them find someone else that will be with you or love the littlest thing you give them. Find out what this person really is like give them something small, plastic something cheep.