Why do nice people finish last?

Question

Men always say they are looking for a good woman but when they get one they dog them out and lie to them constantly.

Answer 1

Nice people give more than they take. This leaves them behind those that take more than they give. At least at first glance. You are only a victim the first time. The rest of the time you are a willing participant.

Have standards for yourself. No one else will get them for you.

Answer 2

I am sorry to here that you have these problems with men. Nice people do not finish last. If you keep on thinking that way you will for the most part finish last, and you will become a victim of your own poor attitude. Yes you are right, lots of men are, well, not so good. Take some time and make sure the man wants to be with you because of every wonderful thing you are, not just sex. I hope you do feel that way about yourself, you are the best, you are wonderful. How are picking your men? Maybe you need to think about that and make some changes.

Answer 3

The problem with that scenario is that you are not dealing with nice guys. Nice guys don't dog them out and lie. People often make the mistake of applying their own characteristics to others, assuming that they have them, but think about how many things you've seen people baffled by that seem like they are just common sense to you. What better line is there when trying to pick up a girl to play than 'why is a nice girl so hard to find?' its the perfect play, if you are a player. You can avoid these situations by doing two simple things:

1. don't invest yourself too far in to a relationship until you are confident that you truly know what they are about and
2. the way you figure out what that is will be in their actions, their actions will match their words, if they don't you know immediately that you are dealing with a person who is not being truthful. women tend to cut men wayyyyyyy too many breaks, especially in the beginning, and 90% of the time when it all goes to pieces they end up feeling stupid because all the signs were there to see but he SAID something else, and since the words were where you wanted the truth to be you chose to believe them. i know i've done it (more than once).

Answer 4

Nice people sometimes confuse being nice with being spineless. Just because you care about how others feel, are sensitive to the social situation, or wouldn't ever take advantage of another person doesn't mean you can forget about yourself.

It's easier to just be a pushover and call it a virtue than to really have an opinion. Acknowledge how you feel about a situation and then act on it. If you're being taken advantage of, speak up. If you're going along because it's easy, speak up. If you're not also getting what you want, own your voice.

There's a direct link between how you regard yourself and how everyone else regards you. In fact, you give others permission every moment how they can treat you. You send the signals in many ways, but believe me, they're catching the drift.

I've been pushed around a lot in my life. If I just get reactive and angry, that doesn't work. But if I care enough about myself, people find that it's not OK to walk all over me. Some relationships go away. Others become stronger.

The answer starts with you.

Good luck.

Answer 5

because some one has to, besides many people out there will only look at nice people to see how they can take advantage of them...of course women never lie to men, espically to save their feelings...and of course women never run around on their men behind their backs ....or not tell the truth and tell their men that the love is gone., just for a few more months of money

Answer 6

How do you know if the male got a good female or not? Give an example.

I take issue with you generalizing the masses. Some males are losers, some females are losers.

Where do you fall in line?

Moms always told me that, "If you do not go into the pig pen they cannot dodo on you".

Answer 7

bitchy girls send the kind of message that says im so out of your league. nothing is more attractive to men than a woman who has dignity and pride in who she is and what she wants. because of all that confidence she isnt going to spend all of her time cheerfully doting on him. infact she may just throw a little attitude his way. so then he wants her even more. always wanting what you cant have is part of human nature and for guys its even more magnified! having a woman who is more difficult makes her seem like more of a conquest and then more of a prize.

the mental challenge of winning over a ***** is even more appealing because men are so competitive. the biggest turn on for a guy is to win the attention of a girl who is selective and he judges that by how easily she gives herself over to him.

i mean if you are a ***** you are giving him a challenge, taking care of number one (so he doesnt have to), you are setting boundaries(they dont feel trapped), and you are not easy...believe it or not guys dont like easy, easy is for fun time girls, hard to get is for long term!

i mean look at angelina jolie!! she always gives off the air that she doesnt need brad, or any man for that matter, which seemingly makes him more attentive!

Answer 8

I think it's because a nice person is sometimes afraid to be assertive for fear of hurting someone. Nice people are worried about making others happy and putting their feelings and needs last. People tend to take advantage of the goodness of "nice" people, it stinks.

Answer 9

Because men like bad women, just like women like bad men.

Answer 10

I agree.. they are pigs.. the one that always says they have always got the worst women ... and they would treat one great if they could find one .. they are lieing!!