...and I'd like some mature, objective opinions.
My parents spanked me when I was young. I remember now one incident where I was told I was going to be spanked, and my dad came up to my room to do it, as usual. I was scared out of my mind, as usual. However, he decided that this time, instead of him spanking me, I should spank him. I'm sure I was 10 or younger at the time. He had me use a wooden paddle on him the way he would have on me.
At the time, I was too young to know that spanking could be even remotely sexual. I'm now 20 years old and terrified having realized this happened. My parents are both the very conservative Christian Bible-thumping type. Why would my dad do this? Is there some benefit in having a child realize how hard it is for a parent to spank? Could this have been something I couldn't have realized at the time? I'm very worried, please help me!
2006-07-13 16:21:42 · 30 answers · asked by dandelion86 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
You know, who knows why he did it...but only one thing matters now, and that's how you respond to it. Don't waste your time giving it any weight. Forgive, Forget, move on and YOU'LL be the winner
2006-07-13 16:26:57 · answer #1 · answered by crazynays 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
if there isn't any other incident of more definite sexual intrusions on you then perhaps that isn't the way that it was meant
i have heard of parents who use spanking to one day reverse the tables and say to the child - now YOU spank ME as i am obviously not being a good enough parent
this done to try and shock the child into understanding the consequences of misbehavior - sometimes works and sometimes doesn't (don't keep asking a 14yo to do that tho or they may get to think THAT is the norm!)
2006-07-13 16:34:18 · answer #2 · answered by Aslan 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The obvious question to me here is have you spoken to your father and mother about this? That is probably the first step. Secondly, the definition of spanking may be important here, was there a sexual twist to this such as pants down? Third, are there any other incidents in your life that would make you think that this was sexual? These are questions for you think about.
2006-07-13 16:29:16 · answer #3 · answered by Janine H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds sexual. But giving the benefit of the doubt he may have wanted to show that spanking is not enjoyable for the parent. Maybe he was just kidding and thought you would get a kick out of it. If there was no other incident than I would have to give the benefit of the doubt. Maybe you dreamed it.
2006-07-13 16:26:53 · answer #4 · answered by Ineedtoknow 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You r making a mountain outta nothing, this happenned when you were 10, u r 20 now, if it was intended to be sexual, wudn ur dad had done some more of it by now?
He was just trying to tell u that as u love him and dont want to beat him up, its the same for him. Get over this weird idea that it was anything remotely sexual. Come-on ur dad deserves better than that.
2006-07-13 16:29:06 · answer #5 · answered by prashantpachauri 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had 2 poodles their names have been Bow an Arrow, I now have a 5 canine an considered one of them i call stubby roo while he became into born he appeared like a toddler kangaroo with a short tail. a million poodle call him Bazil Baliey.His sister is TossyAnna........different names of pets in the previous an preasant( Nobby, Walter,the two birds. Nuegee an Nugget have been guinea pigs. Wilburn, Waffel, an Whenny have been hamsters. A Hedge Hog Named Jazz guy. Oh gosh im fifty 4 yrs previous an i've got had various pets an nevertheless have some an I in many circumstances provide then some relatively unusual names. yet i like all of them.....
2016-10-07 21:51:10 · answer #6 · answered by spies 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Either he was such a caring parent or a pervert - that he enjoyed being spanked and got very little from your mum. But at 10 or younger, you might not have had any feeling of compassion.
2006-07-13 16:44:12 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's really hard to answer without knowing you/your father personally, but I would have to say you should follow your gut feeling. If you are worried, perhaps you know it was inappropriate but you can't bring yourself to realize it completely. On the other hand, you also think your dad may have been using reverse psychology. What did he say to you after you spanked him? Did he say anything at all?
2006-07-13 16:28:10 · answer #8 · answered by Dosu 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If this was the only odd incident u remember..He probably new u loved him and wouldnt want to hurt him. This was probably his way of showing that ur actions hurt him as much as a spanking would have.
2006-07-13 16:26:28 · answer #9 · answered by Lisa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If this is an isolated incident, it's altogether possible that he was trying to teach you just how painful it is for a parent to punish their child. I can remember my father saying "this is going to be more painful for me than it will be for you" and I really didn't understand it until I had kids of my own. I wouldn't say that it's the best method for teaching that lesson, but I would say that's probably what he was doing.
2006-07-13 16:57:26 · answer #10 · answered by Erica B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
May be they were trying to use a different approach on you? My parents use to tell me that whenever they spanked me, their heart would break. So may be your dad thought.. I don't know, that you would know how it felt to have to spank someone?
I don't think it had anything to do with being sexual.
2006-07-13 16:26:29 · answer #11 · answered by cowgoesbaaa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋