my step dad wants to adopt me and everyother weekend i go see me real dad but my life is soo confusing i want to die. HELP ME PLEASE
2006-07-13 16:21:10 · 10 answers · asked by Hailee W 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
FIRST OF ALL, WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO DIE, B/C U HAVE 2 "FATHERS" WHO REALLY LOVE YOU AND WANT TO TAKE CARE OF YOU. IT COULD BE ALOT WORSE, YOU KNOW. YOU COULD HAVE A DEAD BEAT DAD WHO NEVER EVEN CALLS, OR ANYTHING. IF I WERE YOU, I WOULD PROUD TO KNOW THAT BOTH ARE THERE FOR YOU. SIT THEM BOTH DOWN, AND TALK TO THEM, AND TELL THEM HOW YOU FEEL. KEEP IN MIND, THAT EVEN IF ONE HAS "RIGHTS" OVER YOU, THAT DOESN'T MEAN THE OTHER CAN'T BE A FATHER. IT'S ALL HOW YOU FEEL IN YOUR HEARTS.
2006-07-13 16:27:59 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
If you are still in contact with your biological father, I find it rather odd that your step-dad is pushing for an adoption. In fact, it seems very inappropriate. How does your mother feel about this? How does your father feel about this? Generally, when step- parents look into adopting their step children, it is generally because a. the parent is deceased, or b. The parent wants nothing to do with the child. That is obviously not the case with you. What is the real story here?
2006-07-13 17:58:38 · answer #2 · answered by PDY 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only thing I can think that would make you feel so bad is if everyone or someone is telling you that you must choose between them.
You have two dads, and you can love them both and they can both love you and YOU DO NOT HAVE TO CHOOSE.
You need to let everyone involved (and I know that will be hard) that you are not going to choose.
If your biological dad does not want to give up his parental rights, he won't. If he thinks it is best for you, he might. That's not up to you.
If anyone is saying bad things about any of your parents, you need to tell them (another hard thing, I know!) that it hurts you to hear nasty things about someone you love.
When parents split up and remarry, there is a lot of pain and anger. That's just how it is. None of it is your fault, and they need to keep it among the grownups. Remind them all if they forget.
If you keep having problems about the way you feel, talk to a teacher or school nurse or counselor. But remember, it's not your fault, and they cannot make you choose. THEY must work out the grownup problems.
2006-07-13 16:43:26 · answer #3 · answered by LazlaHollyfeld 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should feel wonderful that both of your dads love you so much. I was adopted by my step dad when I was 6. I rarely saw my real dad. Your stepdad can only adopt you if your real dad signs over his rights. And your mom is ok with it all. Your real dad won't LEGALLY have any rights as a parent then. It will then be your mom's and stepdad's choice whether to let you go see him.
2006-07-13 16:32:38 · answer #4 · answered by katsmajik 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If both these guys are wonderful people then consider yourself blessed. a lot of children go through life not having a father figure at all. With that said.. your dad is your dad and as long as he is proving himself to be part of your life then your step dad should understand this and still love you the same.. with or without his last name.
2006-07-13 16:32:28 · answer #5 · answered by just_libs 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Can you talk to your mom about this? If you can, please do so. Part of her role as a parent is to inter fear when an issue is more than you can handle. If not, please talk to a teacher, preacher, or an adult that you trust. They can help. From what little that you has revealed, your father and step-father are competing with each other and you seem to be the prize. They need to be aware of how this is affecting you. If you feel like taking your own life, you need expert help now. Please call 1-800-221-0220, this is a crisis hot-line for teens. I hope this helps.
2006-07-13 16:48:23 · answer #6 · answered by Professor 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please don't think of dying.
You are lucky that your dad and step dad want you.
There are so many people who are abandoned.
You don't have to choose between them. Just make appropriate arrangements and you will be able to dwell in the love of both your dads.
Good luck
2006-07-13 17:14:52 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
why shud you want to die with two loving dads ? please sit down with your mam or gran or grandad & explain what it is that is bothering you. then who ever you choose to talk to let them be the person to talk to your 2 dads on your behalf. they can sort it all out for you. in the mean time you try to be calm & let the adults deal with all the talking. you enjoy your self with your mates. maybe your stepdad wants you to have his name so it is easier for you if your going on holiday or at school they only want whats best for you. for you to have the same last name as your mam.
2006-07-14 13:30:19 · answer #8 · answered by KATIEKAT 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One needs to know why people have wishes for you, you need to clearly understand these motives before making any decision.
2006-07-13 16:32:04 · answer #9 · answered by Ibredd 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
please stay alive life is nice to be in
2006-07-13 16:24:32 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋