My best friend eloped. She's having a reception to celebrate their marriage. She didn't tell her family or friends. Many of us will have to hop on a plane with less than 2 weeks notice to be at the reception. The reception is more like a party, serving hot dogs and burgers. It's all so informal, which is sort of nice.
But, I find myself struggling with their gift registry. Because everything is so informal, is a gift registry appropriate? I don't even know the groom and I'm her best friend...I find it weird. Thoughts?
2006-07-13 13:04:09 · 8 answers · asked by clivencheese 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I should also add that the bride and groom are 28 and 37; they're well established and don't need things like dishes and such.
I'm bothered by the gift registry, not getting them a gift.
2006-07-13 14:02:55 · update #1
They should not be asking for gifts at all. Too many couples think that people should have to buy a ticket (the wedding gift) for their wedding party. They should just be happy that they have friends that would attend, not expect presents.
2006-07-14 00:27:24 · answer #1 · answered by sahel578 5 · 5⤊ 2⤋
It's completely inappropriate of them to request specific gifts for an event which they didn't have the courtesy to actually inform and invite people to. It's compounded by the fact that you're probably all covering the airfare yourselves.
That said, she's your best friend. If it were me, I would probably bring a gift, but not one of the caliber weddings normally demand. Not that I'd cheat my friend, only pick something that's nice but not at the same cost-level as most wedding gifts, closer to what I'd spend for a Christmas gift (or twice that, since it's one gift for two people). If none of the gifts on their registry list is in the price range I had in mind, I'd find them something not on the list.
If you need a gift for both when you don't know the groom, try going to a department store and walking around the wedding gift section - you may get an idea for an item (obvious ones are things like Wedding photo albums) -- then find one that you think they'll like rather than just going with the traditional designs (all white and lace). Snap some pictures at the reception and send them afterwards, leave plenty of space for photos taken throughout their marriage.
That's just an exaple of a traditional gift that you could customize for them without 1) breaking the bank and 2) knowing the groom.
good luck!
2006-07-13 14:21:02 · answer #2 · answered by threesidedorchid 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A registry is superb as long as you do not deliver out formal written bulletins itemizing the position you're registered-that should be coated in a bath invitation, and in no way in the marriage invitation in case you've been having the classic wedding ceremony and were not eloping. All a registry is, is a handbook or favor record.....a paying for aide that everybody isn't required to make your ideas up on between. go away it as a lot as your MIL and sister to pass on the data with the help of word of mouth to anybody who asks...that's proper....maximum people will ask a relative in the experience that they are so vulnerable to furnish a present, what the satisfied couple desires and that is the perfect intro to 'Oh, they are registered at......." In different words, the data ought to in common words be presented if an enquiry is made so a procedures as what type of present, the data ought to not be volunteered without delay-that ought to imagine a present will be coming near near, that's envisioned, and ought to positioned people on the spot good success.
2016-11-02 00:40:39 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is your best friend, so let's give her the benefit of the doubt. Would you have gone to her wedding with two weeks notice? If so, then don't stress about the notice for the reception. Would you have bought her a wedding present if she didn't register for something, or if you had been invited to her wedding but could not attend? I hope so, the present is in honor of the marriage! So, get her a present, go to her party and love her in spite of the backward way in which she has approached this. In all honesty, most people who are getting married end up offending their friends in some way or another because it is a pretty stressful and self-involved time.
2006-07-13 13:54:08 · answer #4 · answered by davis0375 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think gift registries are more for a shower, not the wedding. Most people just bring a card with a check.
Good luck
2006-07-13 13:44:12 · answer #5 · answered by Angela 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely not. If they were not important enough to be invited to the wedding, it would be in poor taste to ask people to buy you something in celebration of a wedding that the bride/groom didn't think they were important enough to attend to begin with.
2006-07-13 13:18:12 · answer #6 · answered by Remy M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Gift registries are good. I put things on it I really liked and I am sure they did also. Althought it seems informal it isnt.
2006-07-13 13:08:14 · answer #7 · answered by blueeyz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no i don't think so ..................... if they can not invite you to the wedding then NO
2006-07-13 14:12:02 · answer #8 · answered by christina g 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋