A man gets pulled over for going 80 in a 45 zone The officer comes to the window and says "do you realize how fast you were going"
"Yes" the man replies
"may I see your licence"
"well my licence was suspended after my third drunk driving conviction"
"Can I see your registration" the officer asks.
"Actually, it's not my car I car jacked it after I killed the owner and stuffed her body in the trunk"
"Sir please stay in the vehicle" the officer says and radios for backup Five minutes later a second officer arrives The second officer comes to the window and asks the man "can I see your licence"
"Of course" says the man as he pulls it from his wallet
"May I see your registration"
"Sure" the man says as he pulls it out of the glove box
"Can you please open the trunk"
"Absolutly" the man replies as he pops the trunk with no body in it
"Sir, my collegue said you were driving a stolen car with a body in the trunk and a suspended licence"
"Really? I bet the lying bastard said I was speeding too"
2006-07-13 11:44:10 · 4 answers · asked by Sam S 2 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
ok.why dont bin liden and his wife dont have sex anymore?because everytime she spreads her legs he see bush.
2006-07-13 15:04:53 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Two brothers were waiting for a bus.
A bus comes and one brother says to the other;
you get on first, no you first says the other...
The bus driver gets pissed and drives off.
A second bus comes by and the same thing...
One brother to the other you first, no..you first...
Same deal...the bus driver drives off without them.
A third bus comes and before the brothers could go through
their routine of politeness, a man also waiting to get on the bus pushes them both on the bus.
The journey was pleasant and sure enough, when the time came to get off the bus, the polite brothers went through the same motions and missed their stop. Many miles and many stops later, the bus driver kicks them off the bus and they are lost in in unknown town. Fortunately, they met a gorgeous girl and after much pleasantries she invited the brothers to her home. One thing led to another and they eventually managed to make love to her. To her dismay, she became pregnant.
Nine months had passed and there were no baby coming out. A second term passed and still no child.
She went to a specialist and after a careful diagnosis, there were twins in her belly.......
One was saying to the other...
you get out first, no you first...
2006-07-13 19:05:38 · answer #2 · answered by ••Mott•• 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That was a pretty good joke!
Here's a corny one
Two guys went camping in the woods. One guy's name is Trouble and the other guy's name is Shut Up. One day, Trouble got lost in the woods and Shut Up went to get help. When he arrived at the police station he was in panic while he was telling the cops what happened to his friend.
The cop says "Relax, first tell me your name"
He says "Shut Up"
The cop looking confused asks again
He says "Shut Up"
The cop gets all angry and says "Are you looking for trouble!"
He says "YeAH!"
2006-07-13 19:29:31 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
HILARIOUS HERE IS MINE
ONE DAY A COP WAS GOING TO PULL OVER A CAR FOR SPEEDING. BUT THE PERSON WOULDN'T STOP. THEY KEPT GOING UNTIL THEY GUY WISENED UP AND PULLED OVER. THE COP GOT OFF THE CAR AND SAID
"SIR I HAD A REALLY TOUGH DAY AND I REALLY WANT TO GET HOME TO MY HOUSE AND REST..... IF U GIVE ME ONE GOOD EXCUSE THAT I HAVEN'T HEARD BEFORE I'LL LET U GO..."
AND THE GUY SAID
"IT'S BECAUSE MY WIFE LEFT ME FOR A COP AND I DIDN'T WANT HER BACK"
HOPE U LIKED IT
2006-07-13 18:51:42 · answer #4 · answered by murillo3193@sbcglobal.net 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋