need help with a 3 year old?

Question

my son is so tough i try to punish him but it does not bother him at all. I have tryed taken things from him, popping his hand and butt, and time out nothing works any ideas? and potty training is a chore any ideas there?

Answer 1

Consistency, consistency, consistency. Your son needs some structure and positive time. Make sure you are spending some time playing and reading to him every day. Be clear with your rules. Time out, when used consistently works well. If your son gets out of time out, put him back and start the time over without saying anything. Eventually, your son will get the idea that you mean business. Here is a good website that may help: http://www.sandymcdaniel.com/parentingsos/sos.htm

Answer 2

I have a four year old that I just went though the same thing with. I had to start reinforcing the good behavior. Soon she got into me telling her how happy I was when she did something good that it started to really mean something to her when I was not pleased. This took months of being consistent though so hang in there.
As far as the potty training thing goes, try throwing Cheerios in the potty and having him try and hit the mark so to speak. :) Sounds crazy but little boys get a kick out of this one.
Charts on the wall of the bathroom and giving them one star for peeing and two stars for pooping worked well too. But everyone that lived in the house or came over had to go and see the chart and clap and make a big deal out of all the stars. :) So if y'all are shy about bathroom habits in your house this idea might be a hard one to follow for you. It has worked for everyone that I know though and usually with in a few short weeks.
Good luck and hang in there. This is just a hard age.
Much Peace

Answer 3

There has to be something that he treasures, a favorite toy. If nothing else, no dessert, early bedtime...those work when I have failed at everything else. Don't push potty training it will be a battle of the wills. The more you push the more he will try to reign control. Make it a fun thing, pick out his own underwear and let him do it and feel it is his choice. He is testing you. If it means days where he gets no play dates, no special outings, just keep doing it. It may bother him even though he won't show it.

Answer 4

For #1 place Cheerios in the potty and tell him to shoot them with his aim. For #2 give 1tbsp mineral oil after supper. In the morning place on toilet and remain there till business is done. Punishment:
Taking things that are the most important to him for extended periods of time. Start w/ 1 day and move up till you reach life. I use this method after I get to about a 3 days they stop. It has worked for two kids so far and I am sure it will on the smallest one when it comes that time. GOOD LUCK

Answer 5

Sounds like you have some tough things to deal with in your family. With an alcoholic dad who just got shot, it doesn't surprise me that your toddler is having problems. Definitely don't pop him - too much violence going on in this kid's life already.

Your husband has to help out. There's no better way to say it. He's got to get help for his drinking and whatever else (why did he get shot at?) Your son is going to keep on acting up - and it's only going to get worse - until you as a family get some help. His dad has to take an active role in his life. If he's busy drinking and getting shot at, he can't be as available as he should be in this little guy's life.

I don't mean to sound harsh or anything, but this doesn't have an easy "parenting" answer. I would guess your son's behavior has deeper roots because of family upheaval.

Answer 6

I hear you loud and clear. My 26-year-old son exhibited the same discipline resistance as yours and it got worse and worse with age. To this day, I still don't know what I could of done different. But I do know you should get some help with the problem. I suggest finding a copy of DR. PHIL's book on raising children. He seems to have a pretty good understanding of the issue and good solutions for it. I suggest this because I don't want to steer you wrong. It's so very easy to make the wrong moves. Best to defer to the experts.

Answer 7

keep doing what your doing dont let him get away with it he will soon wear down i had one that hard headed too. now on potty training
start by making bathroom time fun we put up a fold away toy ,that he could play with while going to the bathroom ,make good for those booboo moments. give lots of praises and a treat for every time he goes in potty. I dont thing you should spank him for accidents in his pants this may set him back. but i would set him in time out and tell him why when you put him in and when you let him out (5mins) tell him again why he got put in time out and ask him to repeat it (if can)this make sure he knows why he has been punished and understands. every hour put him on the pot and every 30 mins ask him if he needs to potty but remember set rules for him and your self and follow throw. he will come around i had two and its a lot of work but i can take them out with out wanting to run home because of there behavor. hang in there they may be tough but were moms were tougher.
good luck

Answer 8

time to enforce some rules, take some TV time away for bad behavior. try just about anything that will work with the three year old that wont hurt him in the long term. and if none of that works time to call nanny 911 or supper nanny.

Answer 9

Take away something that he dearly loves...a stuffed animal, time outside, time with the TV, whatever means the most to him. You need this to have an impact on your son, something that will leave an impression on him so he thinks twice about what he's doing wrong.

Answer 10

TIME AND PATIENCE

Praise all good and right behavior
Scold all bad and wrong behavior

Make sure the TIME is more about the praise than the scold

Be PATIENT