Last Sunday, the Gospel was the one about the ten bridesmaids. The five good bridesmaids remembered to take plenty of oil for their lamps; five bad bridesmaids did not.
The priest at our church is always very fiery and his sermons always end on a high note.
Last Sunday the priest ended with...
"Where would you rather be? In the light with the five good bridesmaids or in the dark with the five bad bridesmaids?"
I wasn't the only one who got it wrong! Bwaahahaha
http://www.total-knowledge.com/~willyblues/
2006-07-13 07:50:17 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
This is an old one but one of my favorites, more of a one liner than a joke.
Did you know that the post office just issued a stamp commemorating Prostitution?
The stamp costs 45 cents but if you want to **** it, it costs 20$.
If you want to be a good sport or show a sarcastic sense of humor, you would give the best points to the christian! He sure spent a lot of time typing a response.
Your eternal destination may depend on it, Bwahahaha yourself, M.
2006-07-13 12:19:49 · answer #1 · answered by Sue Chef 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋
More importantly, I would like to share with you the Truth about the afterlife. I only tell you this because I care what will happen to you when you die. Have you ever told a lie, stolen anything, used God’s name in vain? These are just a few of God’s Moral Laws. When you die, God will judge you on the basis of His Moral Law. If you stand guilty before God of breaking His Laws, He will send you to Hell. If God is Just and Holy, He must punish lawbreakers. The good news is that God provided a way for you to be forgiven and go to Heaven. Jesus Christ died on a cross and rose again to pay the debt for your sins and take your punishment. What you must do is Repent, which means to say you are sorry to God and turn away from your sins. Then put your complete Trust in Jesus Christ. Only then will you be accepted into Heaven, not because you’re a good person, but because you’re a bad person who’s been forgiven. Please give this some thought. Your Eternal Destination depends on it.
2006-07-13 15:34:04 · answer #2 · answered by fishinforsouls 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I get your point...
but in reality the five bad bridesmaids are going to use you up and take all you have and then cheat you and spit you out and then you'll have neither the good bridesmaids anymore nor the bad bridesmaids... only a few memories.
2006-07-13 14:53:03 · answer #3 · answered by Ether 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
in the light( represents Jesus-the Light of the World). the good bridesmaids were prepared for the coming of Jesus, while the others waited to the last minute to try and get their lives together. so they couldn't go with Jesus to heaven (enter the Kingdom of God). but of course you know that right.
2006-07-13 15:03:44 · answer #4 · answered by soulsista 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Home BTW nice Blues site. Cool Tats.
2006-07-13 14:54:43 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It may be not very mature but i would go in hell beacause all fun people are there, and Jimmi Hendrix,
2006-07-13 15:48:54 · answer #6 · answered by The Patriot 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LoL! I know what all the guys would choose.
(Right now I'd take either place over work.)
2006-07-13 14:58:33 · answer #7 · answered by Kenny ♣ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
heaven is a bribe
hell is a threat
with reason by your side
you'll be all set
2006-07-13 14:52:34 · answer #8 · answered by myspace.com/samfemino 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is help for such insanity.
See THE SKEPTICAL REVEIW ONLINE
2006-07-13 14:55:37 · answer #9 · answered by theagitator@sbcglobal.net 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
to quote a lyric
"sheep go to heaven"
2006-07-13 14:56:23 · answer #10 · answered by Lady 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋