How much money should you spend on a wedding gift?

Question

My boyfriend is the best man, but we are all recent college graduates. We also have to travel and stay the weekend. I've looked at the registry and the prices vary, so we really can spend as much as we want - but we don't know how much is appropriate.

Answer 1

Here's a story that will help with many uncertainties of this type. Suppose an old high school friend does very well for herself, has a lot of money, invites you over for dinner. You eat lobster and cavier, served from silver and crystal. You drink fine wines.

Then you despair of ever being able to return her hospitality. You simply can't afford lobster and cavier, and your BEST china is the Correl. The solution is that you don't. You entertain in the style to which YOU are accustomed, not the style to which SHE is accustomed. Invite her to a backyard cook out with burgers and beer. Or ask her to join your family for bowling night.

So give according to what you can afford, not according the lavishness of the wedding, the income level of other families, or the expectations express by the registry items. There is nothing wrong with homemade preserves or a modest kitchen gadget when the giver is a student or otherwise on a budget.

Answer 2

My husband and I are recent college graduates also and have attended 8 weddings in the past 2 1/2 months so we can't afford to spend a lot. We usually look for something on the registry around $40-$50, but we are in the Midwest so that could be low for other parts of the country. When I got married I didn't expect expensive gifts, or any gifts for that matter, from my wedding party because I knew that they were spending so much money buying dresses, renting tuxes, traveling and staying in hotels. I was just happy to have them there supporting me.

Answer 3

The registry is there for a reason. It's so the bride and groom can pick out what they want. You should pick something from there and not worry about how much or little you spend. It's the thought that counts. Not the amount of money you spend. Personally, I usually keep all of my wedding gifts at $50 or less, and I try to buy several of the smaller things on the registry, so it looks like I got a "bigger" present! It makes me feel good about not spending a lot of dough.

Answer 4

if you are CLOSE with the bride and groom i would spend about 100.. If they are just aquaintances, spend about 50..

I would probably spend 100 since he is the best man. I am in a friend's wedding, and I spent a little more than 100. We are all recent graduates as well. Good luck.

PS- I would NEVER spend 250 on a wedding gift unless it was like, my sister.... If the people planned an expensive elaborate wedding, thats not your problem. Give them what you can afford.. dont feel you have to "pay" for your food. They invited you as a guest, so they should "pay" for it.

Answer 5

What part of the country are you from? It differs so much depending on where you are. I went to a wedding a couple weeks ago and gave $250 for me and my boyfriend because the plate was 125.
Typically, most people around here (NJ) give the price of the plate.


To sour apple: Like I said, it depends on what part of the country you are from. Where I am, this is typical. And of course, it is assumed if you can't give that much, give what you can. When I first graduated from college, I went to my cousin's wedding and only gave $75 (and I didn't bring a date. If I had brought a date, I would've given more). And I'm not saying you should give $250. For all I know, where you live a wedding costs $50 a plate. This wedding I went to wasn't "lavish". Weddings are just really expensive around here.

Answer 6

Being a recently wed woman, we found that people typically spent about $50-$100 on gifts or cash/checks in a card. Our wedding really wasn't SUPER formal but we did learn that no matter how much we spent on our wedding we didn't break even, the bride and the groom will understand your situation either way, a lot of our wedding party is recently graduated from college and battling the student loans so we understood that they give what they can and that in the end that's not what it's even about anyway, it's about them being there to share your special day with you! :)

Answer 7

The reason the bride and groom put things on their registry with varying prices is to appease their guests' variety of financial situations. You can spend as little or as much as you want. Buy them something from their registry that doesn't cost very much and then try to think of a way to add a personal touch to it...something to do with an inside joke, a fond memory, etc.

Answer 8

First, your boyfriend has been asked to be Best Man. This is quite an honor & signifies the friendship between him & the groom. But as you stated, it is an expense in & of itself. And I'm assuming that the lodging is not being supplied but that you must pay for this, as well.
Spend what you can afford. If you are crafty, you might make something for the couple. A pillow with their names & wedding date, a placque with their invitation decoupaged. And if you can't afford a gift, go to the wedding as support to the happy couple and their decision to make their relationship permanent.

And if you are being invited to the wedding strictly for what you can get the couple.........

Answer 9

In general, I don't think anyone should ever spend any more on a wedding gift than they can afford. Period. Unless someone gets the couple some terribly chincy gift (like, I don't know, a pack of toilet paper), anyone who turns their nose up at the monetary value of a gift is a snob at best, ungrateful at worst. Don't worry so much about how much to spend as in the gift itself.

Answer 10

Its not about they money. Me and my boyfriend just went to a wedding and spent probably $20 on this gift. they are not getting married for the presents so dont stress over it. I am sure they understand that you dont have a lot of money and that your presence there is more important than some fancy gift. Leave that to the parents and go get them some X rated gifts :)