I have been seeing this man on and off over the past ten years, he means the world to me... back in Feburary he told me he feels nothing for me.. I was heart broken, I never seen it coming.. And the thing is I'm pregnant with his child and now he's treating me like he's never met me.. I am 30 years old and blown away with by the way he is treating me. But the worst part is I miss him and want to talk to him..What do I do? I know I should forget about him and move forward but I can't seem to let go.....
2006-07-12 20:39:41 · 12 answers · asked by sunshine 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
the first thing i can gather from reading this is that your boyfriend(or ex) is obviously scared by the fact that he is about to become a dad.i think that he probably feels like he is trapped..(so mean..but what can i say guys can truly be big dookies sometimes)personally..if i were you i would want to castrate the piece of ****..i mean honestly..he created the baby with you..and to mistreat a pregnant woman should be illegal..but it isnt..and he went there..i think that if i were you i would give him some space..(sounds like a crock of **** because your carrying his baby..and you shouldnt have to be alone..)but for the time being you need to be strong and stand your ground.i know all that you can focus on now is all the hurt..how much he has done to you..and i know that it makes it even worse because you are the mother of his child and he could still treat you like ****.next time that you start missing him..just remember that..he put you uin this situation..and he is the one making you feel horrible..a true man..and a good catch wouldnt do that..so you need to give him time to realize the HUGE mistake that he has made.when he finally does come around...which he WILL..(10 yrs is too long to just end like that sweetheart.)you need to tell him how ****** up and immature and scummy he was to you..I dont know you..and you dont know me..but i have seen many women get hurt throughout my life and im pretty damn sick of it..i want you to stand up for yourself and for your unborn kid..because you BOTH deserve better..you desreve the father of your baby to treat you like a queen..not just some chick he knocked up..excuse my language..but **** that ****..DONT SETTLE..if this ******* doesnt come around for you and for your growing family then you need to find someone who will.Do not chase after him..that will only push him further away..its just like that old saying "you dont know what you've got till its gone" show him what life is like without you..and make him pay for what he has put you through.life throws you curveballs sometimes..things you never see coming..but you have to take them in stride..and know that after every dark night comes a bright new morning.I cant lie and say that giving him as much space he needs is gonna be easy..theres gonna be times when you feel like the only way to make things right is to hear his voice..but this isnt true because he is the reason everything went wrong.find a support system..your friends..your family..anyone who is emotionally there for you..and you need to lean on them like a crutch..everything happens for a reason..and not to sound weird or anything..but God really does have a plan for everyone..and everything happens for a reason...if this doesnt work out..its because HE has something way better planned for you.PLEASE PLEASE KEEP YOUR HEAD UP..be strong for you and your baby..take care of yourself..i know being heartbroken can take a toll on your health..pbut you cant do that your pregnant..take care of yourself and the lil one.babys are a gift..coming from a girl who has lost one..what you have is precious..and the love that you and your baby will have wont be fickle like the guy was..it will be true.You'll be in my prayers..and i genuinally hope that everything works out for you. remember..the best way out is always through.
2006-07-12 21:03:02 · answer #1 · answered by kelkel0514 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is tuff. First off, ask yourself why you spent 10 years w/a man and did not get married after 3? why would you stay w/him? what did he fill in your life and provide you that you needed? It is very painful and you will miss him and that is very normal. You need to move on though. You need to start relying on others for emotional support and not him. If you can see a therapist, I think that would help you a lot. There are a lot of bad ones out there so if you get a bad feeling about the person you are probably right. But therapy can actually help you and now that you are bringing a child into the world, you want to me emotionally ready and not screw them up!!
Love sucks. He's an *** though. You have to fight through the pain b/c he is not worth another struggle.
2006-07-12 20:47:43 · answer #2 · answered by chill'n 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Alright. Some down-to-earth advice: You are very emotionally unstable. You hate yourself enough to run toward a man who ripped your heart out for you. Even after he offered up the great gift of telling you the harsh truth: He doesn't want you.
I understand you are heartbroken and that is uncomfortable. I also understand you have an unhealthy obsession with someone who doesn't like or respect you.
The best way to deal with this is to feel whatever you're feeling but act like a mother-to-be instead of an insecure person desperately chasing after a drug (a crappy guy) that won't even get you high. Your child will be needing you minus unhealthy drama. Your kid will need you to be setting a good example as it pertains to what company you keep. Think of the kid instead of yourself now.
Legally establish this loser as the father of your child. Then stop chasing him except if he shafts you on child support.
Finally, stay out of relationships until you can be a healthy person. Which means going to see a counselor and figuring out why you're willing to drag yourself under a car just so you can French kiss the asphalt.
2006-07-12 20:43:50 · answer #3 · answered by Rewsna 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Move forward with out him ~ Focus on your child & yourself.Getting upset or stressing out about this jerk is not & will not help you or you unborn baby. The best & only thing you can do at this point start rebuliding your life around your child & making sure that s/he is taking care of. There is nothing you can do to change how HE feels about you.
2006-07-12 20:49:57 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best advice that I can give is this... Fast forward 30 yrs. Your "daughter " is in the same predicament you are in. Would you tell her to wait for him, or would you tell her to kick the creep to the curb? It's not a good situation for her and it's not a good situation for you! I hope things go well for you and congratulations! There is nothing more special than having children. I have 2 and they are my angels.
2006-07-14 08:15:40 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone else on here has said more or less everything I wanted to say. I just want to tell you congrats on your new baby, and you need to remember that this child that you are having is going to need you, 100%. You need to be there for the child. There's lots of women who are single mothers and do just fine. Now is the time of courage and strength. Blessed be to you and your baby.
2006-07-12 22:53:23 · answer #6 · answered by drewsilla01 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have to admit I've never understood why someone gets desperate over someone who doesn't care. If a man shows no interest, I have no interest. You MUST file paternity, though. Women are always saying," I just want to get past this," but they deserve much more. Believe it. Get child support and grow some self-esteem.
2006-07-12 20:48:30 · answer #7 · answered by galaxiquestar 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know its hard girl, but you have to think of whats best for you and your baby. not him. you have to know your better then him and you dont need him, one day hes going to look back and feel like s*** about all this. you need to be healthy, care for your baby, spend more time with family and friends... go shopping put on make up, it does help. im pregnant also. just know a dumb a** cant get you down, your a woman and your in control. theres tons of guys out there. go for it. good luck and god bless you and the baby.
2006-07-12 20:46:42 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
everytime he see`s u needy and desperate for him, he will run amile. i know its so hard to move forward but u have to trust me, everytime he knows ur there to fall back on he will never be intrested.
stop feeling anxious and get on with ur life. everyone thinks that they cant but then they turn a corner and they cant belive they had such low self esstem that they where willing to be back with this jerk.
when ur child comes along u will be focusing all ur energy into them, so take a deep breath and hold ur head high.
u do not need this guy, and neither does ur child
u will be ok.....i promise.
take care
2006-07-12 21:11:17 · answer #9 · answered by lovelygeorgeoussexy1986 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
exact same thing happened to me. He was "in the middle of something" when my water broke, He just never cared. I have the healthiest happiest little boy in the world. even though I hate him for making me do it all alone, I love that he has given me my son. its really hard. really hard. but do what you feel in your heart. some of the best men i have met would gladly beat him up for you ;)
2006-07-12 20:52:31 · answer #10 · answered by grnfroggie81 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋