My b/f has cheated on me (6 times that I know of) when we were together the first time. Its been about two years and we are trying things again. We have had our time apart. We have a lot of fun when we are together and he does make me happy. I want to believe he has changed. Also just recently in a phone call we were talking about a friend and he said he told the friend not to say anything b/c of the consequences. That could've been something he just said because of the circumstances w/ the friend... or is that how he thinks? HELP!!! I'm going crazy.
2006-07-12 18:54:40 · 24 answers · asked by Mandy 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Yes, relationships are completely confusing. I've only have one guy cheat on me, but my friends have had plenty, so I've delt with many. First, you can't be afraid to set ground rules. Be careful not to get too clingy though. Just keep it simple like "I would like to know whats going on at certain times and who your with and where i can contact you if i need you." Keep it simple. You have to make him want to build up that trust again that he broke of yours. And if he doesnt give a damn, then screw him. Just remember, it's his loss, not yours. He may be hard to get over if it doesnt work, but at least you can get your self excited about the next guy that will sweep you off your feet!!! Good Luck!!
2006-07-12 19:03:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
Well let me tell you that I have been on the other side of your question once in twenty years of relationships. I hate that just about every woman believes that once a cheater always a cheater because it would always depend on the circumstances. I do believe that in your case that it is very likely that he will again but ,I COULD BE WRONG. You are the only person in your skin and your life is in your hands ,do what your head says to do, and do it because its what you want to do. Good luck , and there are tonnes of fish in the sea. I think you might want to change your bait though. food for thought.
2006-07-13 02:05:41 · answer #2 · answered by status quo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cheaters can change - people cheat for all sorts of reasons. If he was cheating on you before and there was no reason other than he couldn't keep his dick in his pants then theres a problem - because he was cheating just because he wanted to, not because there was something wrong.
Talk to him about how you feel and make sure you are both on the same page. If you both want a committed relationship and are ready to be faithful (especially him) then you shouldn't have any problems.
2006-07-13 01:57:53 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When a guy cheats on you once, he will do it again because you have allowed him to do it once, twice, in your case six times. Can cheaters change yes, I believe they can. My boyfriend of almost a year, cheated on his ex-girlfriend, he told me since they started going out they were together for 7 years. They never had an open communication, he didn't respect her ( so he tells me of course). Me and him have a wonderful relationship, we are always together, and never in mind has he demonstrated to me or given me any signs of him cheating on me. I always bring anything up to his attention that I don't like and if he doesn't like the idea, he can go bye bye. But when you allow a man to step on your toes so many times, they think they are slick and will attempt to do it again because you let them. I honestly believe you should move on and find someone that will respect you from the beginning
2006-07-13 02:01:43 · answer #4 · answered by Claudia Frm Chicago 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its not what you want to hear, but once a cheater always a cheater. the same thing happened with my parents. my dad kept doing the things your BF was doing and my mom was just letting things slide. in the end, it all went downhill. if you reeeeaaalllyy honestly think hes changed, give him another chance, but oherwise, let him go before you get hurt really badly.
2006-07-13 01:59:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
depending on what kind of person he is..think to yourself about that..is he the kind of person that usually sticks to his words or promises...or is he known (even for small things) to lie or make bad decisions...majority, i think once a cheater always a cheater...but there are a certain few out there who may be able to change their ways..u just got to remember he might do it again because he may think he can get away with it and youll give him once more another chance....
2006-07-13 02:03:21 · answer #6 · answered by elle28 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it was me.
The 2ND time,
( if he was lucky i didn't do it the first ~! )
He be gone ~ !
How you went threw 6 times is shocking to me.
A man that cheats, will continue to do so,
Until he his ready to settle down.~ !
Or falls deep in LOVE ~!
Then he is wearing the other shoe, hoping she don't cheat , as he did in the past~!
When he is settled down, he will stop, till then,,,,,,,,,,,,
The question is , ?????
how long are you going to allow this to go on,?
He isn't even close to settling down, if he has done this 6 times~!
And deep down , he knows ,
if he does it again, you still will be there~!
If it was me , i would get out of it completely~!
Also women cheat just as much as men,
they just don't talk about it~!
Sorry i answer how i see it.
Take care, ~*~*~*~Peace.
2006-07-13 02:07:17 · answer #7 · answered by Brat-tett & Brat Pack's 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i believe that once a a cheater, always a cheaters, the fact that
you want to go back with someone that has cheated on you
numerous times that not good. you deserve so much better than
that. it about respect.
2006-07-13 01:59:42 · answer #8 · answered by quietstorm 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he cheated once, he'll cheat again. Something drastic must happen to change him.Likelihood is that he will cheat again. This time play very smart. Don't fall for him that quick.
2006-07-13 01:59:29 · answer #9 · answered by Donna M 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if someone loves you they wont cheat. and if they do just HAPPEN to do it that ONE time...then depending on your level of self respect, you can decide wether or not to take them back.
but 6 times.... honestly... just imagine someone else saying that to you... what advice would you give yourself.
i know from my experience, if i cheat, it meant i really didnt care that much about that person. period. it means that there was something better. and if theres something better, then it isnt love. because love is the best it gets.
cha know?
2006-07-13 01:58:45 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋