my brother and i have been living with arguing for the past 3 years because my parents have been divoced for 3 years, my brother is 11 and i'm 13 and i want' him to have a good life, mine is already wrecked.
2006-07-12 17:53:51 · 25 answers · asked by Baby Raychel 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
push it out and focus on you and your brother, get into extracurricular activities with your brother
2006-07-12 17:57:39 · answer #1 · answered by hectortuba 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I wish my parents were divorced... it would beat having to hear them yell at each other all day- also over stupid things
Dude I know how you feel... but i've been dealin wit for 15 years not 3 >> .. by the time I was 8 I learned a simple trick... it's called: turning the volume a little louder
There's not much you can do. Just know it's not your fault, and you can't really stop your parents from fighting, just try to keep your brother away from it as much as you can, and think of this as an oppertunity to get stronger, and a learning experience, knowing that when you are older you will not make the same mistake.
2006-07-12 17:59:51 · answer #2 · answered by Chii666 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your life does not have to be wrecked because of the adults' lack of control. (If they are divorced, why are they arguing about folding laundry? Divorced people usually have separate households and do not have to fight about such issues any more.)
You and your brother should take a reasonable amount of household responsibility. Keep your rooms clean and do some chores regularly and keep your school performance up. This is enough responsibility for people your age. Take care of it consistently and let yourselves have peaceful consciences and get on with your lives, whether or not the adults ever get it together. Some adults don't. That doesn't have to influence your choices.
2006-07-12 18:05:51 · answer #3 · answered by silver.graph 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If they are divorced, why are they still arguing? If it is getting that bad, you need to tell someone that you trust, another family member or a teacher or a counselor at school. Most likely they are so caught up in fighting with each other, they have no idea that it is effecting you or your brother this badly. Hang in there and try to keep your brother and yourself out of their way when they get to spatting, go to another room, turn on the TV or stereo or something.
2006-07-12 17:58:51 · answer #4 · answered by babydoll121070 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
and here starts the period of ignorence , for god sake he won't have a good life , he already noticed ur parents'fights and disagreements and let me assure u that he w ould never forget those words , those situations till the end of his life . what to do ? nothing , just ignore it as we tend to ignore the bad things of our life , what do u think u can do ? u 'll go to ur parents and ask them to stop fighting and they'll say : you're right , we have to stop . nooo way , so just move on , u know .. everytime u hear a fight turn on some loud music , take ur brother and have a long walk . coz it seems to be that this circle has no end . good luck
2006-07-12 18:05:49 · answer #5 · answered by chocolate 90 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to them and try to keep your brother out of hearing range of the fighting and for gods sake don't take sides. It is OK to love both parents equally. VERY important to let them know how you feel about the fighting Get them to sit down with you about ground rules. Grown ups sometimes need to fight but never in a way that you guys start worrying about grown up stuff. and never within earshot of the kids.
2006-07-12 18:04:24 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to help relieve some of mom's stress. Help out more, don't just sit and listen. You will be surprised how the situation might change if more people helped moms. They have the hardest job, and sometimes work outside the home., and this causes allot of stress, especially when dads don't help out. So if you really hate it when they fight over the laundry, just say "hey, I can do that mom!!, let me help, and see what happens, or even better, just do it or anything without having to be told to do it., she will smile more and argue less maybe, huh??
2006-07-12 18:05:13 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm feelin you on this one. My parents have argued since i can even remember. I'm 19 now and I really don't let it get to me. I know its hard because you want a better envirnment for you bro. But hey I'm sure he'll survive, just like you. The important thing is to not duplicate it when you get older. Because you'll be married and on your own someday. See some ppl learn how to do things from their parents, and some ppl learn what NOT to do lol.
Many blessings and remember...
This too shall pass
2006-07-12 18:01:24 · answer #8 · answered by Miss Thang 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should speak to your parents about it, ask them not to fight and argue in front of you and your brother. Explain your concerns for your brother. It's very mature of you and I applaud you for that. Try to talk to your parents about it, if it doesn't approve, then perhaps you should start explaining things to your brother. If things really don't go anywhere, you should then speak to a teacher or an adult who can help you in this kind of situation. I'm really sorry that you're stuck in this kind of thing. Good luck and know that things will get better.
2006-07-12 17:58:36 · answer #9 · answered by @~>--T--<~@ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is very sad. Your parents are filled with so much anger they can't control it. The best thing to do for you and your brother, is to remove yourself from it when they start. If you can get out of the house and go somewhere, do it. Even if it's just for a walk around the block 50 times until they quit yelling. If it's too late in the evening when they start, close yourselves in your room. If you can enroll in after school programs to limit your time around them, do it.
Don't get in the middle of it, or try to fix it , when they are in the heat of battle. Don't let them pressure you or your brother to take sides.
If there is another adult that you trust , go talk to them about it. It helps to have someone to talk things out with that's older than you.
Trying to cope with this on your own is not good. If there is some way that you and your brother can get family counseling, you might benefit from that. Maybe your school counselor can get this for you, free of charge, and it will give you a handle on how to cope. Churches also have these kinds of programs in place.
Also understand that your parents are behaving very immaturely. Real adults try to work out their problems without yelling, screaming and name calling. And they don't involve children in the middle of all that anger. I don't know if they are using drugs or alcohol, but that can add to the out- of -control behavior they seem to be in.
Remember, nothing last's forever, in time, one of your parents may move on with their life and the other one won't have anyone to fight with.
Also, you may not believe this, but sending some prayers up to God, asking him to make things better for you and your brother will help.
Finally, you can't fix your parents, but you can resolve never to behave like they are behaving , when you grow up and have children of your own.
2006-07-12 18:15:07 · answer #10 · answered by pinegreen7 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow. I divorced my husband because he tried to argue about everything. Now, my kids are grown, but their father and them don't speak anymore. It's childish to argue. Remind your brother that it's their problem, not yours or his. If your parents can't see the damage, maybe it's time to talk to a teacher you trust, or your principal at your school. If it gets too bad, remember, there is such thing as "Child Protective Services". Good Luck!
2006-07-12 18:05:13 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋