My wedding is in one year and its getting to be huge. The guest list gets bigger and bigger which means more money. We have changed reception places three times. Do i cut people off or spend the money. Money is not the problem, but are big weddings all that fun? Should i keep it simpilar or huge. This is my first wedding and my planner thinks that i should just except the fact i have a huge guest list. What do i do?
2006-07-12 17:13:53 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
(Is the planner getting paid by how large the wedding ends up? just curious...)
big weddings can be fun or a hassle depending upon not the size - but the SIMPLICITY of the event. it is the stress of too much to handle that does a couple or their parents in when they should instead be done with all the stressful stuff and enjoying the special day with loved ones. do as much as you can ahead of time. think creatively, consider making your own unique favors if you are giving any away, my nephew and niece in law got tiny bottles and put a few shells and a note in them stating names and wedding date as they were going to florida on their honeymoon. My daughter got little cobalt blue glass flower pots and tiny forget-me-not seed packets and put a label on the packets with the names and date, placing them in the flower pots along with a few hersheys kisses. She had 400+ invited, and this was an easy project for that many guests - we found the seeds and pots on clearance, but you said money was not a problem. remember that you have a year. if you are doing silk flowers, go to the hobby and craft stores now and pick them out if possible, then get them made early so you know you will be satisfied with your bouquets. one less thing to worry about. tell the bridal place that you need the dress a week earlier. then if there is any altering to be done, you can get it without panicking. whatever you do - use 2 planner books, write down everything - every idea you think of - in the first one as you may forget what it was you thought would be cool, and then write down what you decided on in the other. this will help immensely. my daughter carried her first one around all the time, and got ideas like crazy. and yes, if you feel you should cut back a bit, do so. it is not your planner's wedding, it is yours. (my daughter couldn't cut back as she married into a HUGE family. both parents of the groom had many siblings - 15 on mom's and 10 on dad's. they all had kids and they all are close. there was just no way.) you don't need to go with the fanciest cake ever - it gets eaten just the same and is still pretty no matter what. one thing I thought was really cool was the surprise my daughter set up for her new hubby. he loves fireworks, and at the end of the toasts two sparkly fountains erupted one on each side of them (they were indoor ones made specially for this purpose and the hall had them). he was so thrilled he could do nothing but just glowingly smile and then he grabbed her up for a fabulous kiss - what a photo opportunity that was!!!! as I said think creatively, do something different, and simplicity is a key to success. One thing not to skimp on if possible - the photographer. all the rest will be done in a day, some things forgotten, but your group of photos are the one thing that is your keepsake. We look at ours with the grandkids now, and they bring back such great memories - and the kids want to look and hear us tell stories about the people in the photos.
and yes - big weddings can be fun as can little ones. it is what you do and how you plan that makes the difference. we had a ball at our daughter's huge wedding, and also at our son's wedding - he had only 50 people at his and it was at his boss's home!
the most important thing is have whatever you need done out of the way before the wedding and reception, as then you have nothing left to do but enjoy your guests and a bit of dancing with your new spouse, and have a fantastic time! (don't get bombed either of you, as it has ruined more wedding receptions... and honeymoons too)
best wishes and congrats!
2006-07-12 17:53:56 · answer #1 · answered by still learning at 56 5 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Well the biggest factor is $$$$, which you indicated is not a problem. If this is in fact the case, it really boils down to you. Just remember this... do you really care if your 1st grade teach, or your best friend in middle school who you haven't tlked to since 9th grade really comes? Remember that after your first dance as husband and wife you will have to circulate the room and make conversation with everyone. Do you want to spend your wohle reception talking to people you really don't have ,uch in commion with anymore? Personally, I'm a fan of a smaller wedding, even though I'm a social butterfly. Another way to look at it is this: not everyone needs to come to the wedding. Some people would be happier just coming to a shower or a post-honeymoon picture/story sharing. And remember, as much as you want to trust your wedding planner, she is making money of you. The bigger your guest list, the more they make. ;-)
Whatever you decide, I hope it all goes as smoothly and beautifully as you've always dreamed. Congratualtions!
2006-07-13 00:21:37 · answer #2 · answered by CrimelessRaver 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm just stating opinion, but I've gone to at least 5 weddings in my lifetime, and I swear that out of all 5 of them, the smaller one (about 60 people) was the most enjoyable one. The rest were fairly large (at least 300 at one). It seems fun the first time, but then you just get lost in a sea of people. It's fine to invite a lot of people if you really want them to be there, but at the smaller wedding, where it was more intimate and the people there were really close to the couple, it was much more meaningful and enjoyable. I think you should keep what you want out of a wedding in mind. Do you want something to really celebrate your married life, or are you just looking for a big shing-ding where the whole town's going (I think of Bilbo Baggins birthday party... :P). I would say focus on what you really want from your wedding, and use that as a guide to how long the guest list should be. Cheers to your new life.
2006-07-13 00:20:46 · answer #3 · answered by Playwright Extraordinaire 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think about the night and how much time you will have to enjoy your reception. If we had gotten married in NYC, we would have been pushing a large guest list (as this is where we live). I chose to have a destination wedding where I was able to spend time with everyone at the reception, and really enjoy the party. We were able to talk to everyone (as we had 45-50 people at the reception). Our pics had us so relaxed looking and not tired from walking around to greet everyone.
2006-07-13 14:53:42 · answer #4 · answered by Scarlett 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Too big a wedding is when you only know 1/4 of the invited people. I only invited close friends and family to my wedding and my sister had like around 200 people invited. Only about 75 showed up. The wedding party counted for 25 people!!!
Do what you want, invite who you want. If you want small, go small. Otherwise keep it rolling!
2006-07-13 09:47:02 · answer #5 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do what you want, it's your day! I had orginally planned for a big wedding, but then scaled it down a bit. I didn't want to spend my whole time talking to guests and not enjoying my day. It's a personal decision, just do what's right for you. But remember, if money's not an object, more guests=more presents!! LOL
2006-07-13 00:18:12 · answer #6 · answered by Nita 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's your day, so do whatever you want!
If money is not an issue, then keep with the list you have...
If you really want to cut down, then look at your list and see who you can take off... If you can't take anyone off, then leave it!
Big weddings are huge fun..... Don't worry about it!!!!
2006-07-13 00:17:13 · answer #7 · answered by kristijay99 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Star Jones' wedding was a bit too big. Invite the people that mean a lot to you and want you to be happy. If that is your entire state, then party on. Don't invite business friends or people you haven't seen since high school. Invite the people that mean the most. Anyhow, you should talk to your groom. It should be his opinion that matters, not the people on Yahoo Answers.
2006-07-13 00:16:34 · answer #8 · answered by newsblews361 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there is never too big of a wedding. since this is your first , you should go all out and make it your dream wedding. Since money is not the problem then i say go all out and enjoy it.
p.s.
how would your already invited guests feel if they were suddenly uninvited?Or better yet how would you feel if that happened to you? and it wouldnt be good if they already bought you wedding gifts either!!
also congradulations!!!!hope all goes well!
2006-07-13 00:21:45 · answer #9 · answered by Emma 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It really depends on your "ideal" wedding..... for example... if you like BIG weddings (400-500ppl) then...the cost is the problem. BUT if cost is not that problem...then HECK enjoy yourself..... and invite the whole world :D
I have been to weddings that is 800 ppl ...and it just gets crazy!! cuz you probably won't have time for ALL the guests....and probably won't know half of them :( those are the cons (minus the cost factor)
2006-07-13 03:47:25 · answer #10 · answered by niku414 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋