How do I tell the man I love that I think he is verbally abusing me? What do I tell him verbal abuse is? How can I make him understand what it is? I know, I've read up on it but I need some help in finding a way to bring this up to his attention without hurting his feelings anymore than I have to.
2006-07-12 15:06:37 · 9 answers · asked by tlc_lovin_for_ya 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You have to call him on it every time it happens! Firmly say "You are not allowed to talk to me that way." Or something like that, you have to be very consistent and make sure he knows you're serious. Abusers are not rational, reasonable people...they will not just "get it" one day. So if it keeps happening after you have tried to change the way you react to it to let him know that it is NOT okay to treat you that way, you have to get out. You are not responsible for helping him if he does not understand. Don't waste your energy for too long.
2006-07-14 10:19:15 · answer #1 · answered by L 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The abusive man is not a myth; any woman can meet one, and they can be found in all age groups and at all socioeconomic levels. Recognize the warning signs of a potential abuser. The more you see, the greater your risk. And the more self-protective you need to be about getting involved. An insecure and abusive man begins to criticize you, small things at first, like the way you cook eggs and the way you make the bed. He tells you what's best for you, and he finds fault with everything. The way you dress. The way you eat. What you eat. Abusive behavior frequently reveals itself in stages with emotional abuse preceding physical abuse; no form of abuse is acceptable. If he seems obsessed with trying to control you and your behavior, he is being emotionally abusive. He can control with money, by sabotaging your best interest unending demands, with his mood , with his temper. does he have a problem with drugs or drinking? without good friends? extremely possesive? unprovoked jealousy? serious problem with self-esteem? Whether it's emotional or physical, abuse is abuse.
2006-07-12 22:25:21 · answer #2 · answered by Ivy C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Who cares about hurting his feelings. He's hurting yours.Tell him not to talk you that way. If he does like, too bad. I am sure he knows what he is doing. He very well knows what verbal abuse is. It is just another way to belittle you and control you. Don't put up with that crap!!!
2006-07-12 22:12:09 · answer #3 · answered by tigerprincess_bee 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he says things to intentionally hurt you, "punching you with his words" then its verbal abuse. You need to get out because an azz-whooping is soon to follow!
2006-07-12 22:10:26 · answer #4 · answered by Kwikn H 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not hurting his feelings? Sweetie, if he is treating you like a doormat, he really needs a reality check, and your attention to his "feelings" is probably why he can abuse you like that. Speak your peace and let the chips fall where they may.
2006-07-12 22:10:43 · answer #5 · answered by Mommymonster 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You were able to voice your issue with us, clearly and in a non-emotional fashion, so try doing the same to him when you catch him saying the wrong thing.
Don't get mad, just communicate what you do not like and then clarify what you do like him to say. Perhaps he'll get a clue.
2006-07-12 22:11:28 · answer #6 · answered by Khalen 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Get out now, because it won't change. I no from experience
2006-07-12 22:10:20 · answer #7 · answered by Right Wing Extremist 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
don't allow him.
2006-07-12 22:09:16 · answer #8 · answered by Leonardo 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
SHUT UP YOU DUMB BIOTCH
2006-07-12 22:10:35 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 5⤋