I am never happy, I am 14, and do not have many friends, how do I make friends?, What causes unhappiness?

Question

No details, I am never happy, I do not know why. only have two friends, home schooled. How do I meet friends, mostly girls.

Thanks, Brooke and Chloe.

Answer 1

You can choose to be unhappy or choose to be happy...

When your happiness depends on stuff outside your influence - then you have given up a bit of control over your well being... keep doing that and you will be sure to be miserable.

Find an interest find a purpose for BEing and pursue it with all your effort. A deliberate attitude is infectious and you will be amazed by the changes that start to occur in your life.

Start young and you'll have a great future - one where you are in charge!

Answer 2

If you have 2 friends that is better than some people. Can you expand your circle of friends with people your 2 friends know? Although being homeschooled has its advantages, this is one of the downsides. Does your mom or dad have you participate in any of the activities available to homeschooled children? There are groups that homeschooled children can join to participate in sports, music, art for example. If you don't, maybe you could talk to your parents about finding a group to join. Some people have suggested that you get involved in other activities and that is a good idea but what you need to work on is making your own happiness. That is a hard thing for many people to understand and accept. No one is responsible for your happiness. You choose to be happy or not. For example, my son is also 14. Yesterday, he had an emergency appendectomy. It turns out that there was nothing wrong with his appendix but another problem. That means he had the operation for nothing. Now he is going through a lot of pain and discomfort because of an operation he didn't need after all. But instead of getting mad about that, he said, "Well, at least now I won't have to ever worry about my appendix bursting!" It is all about how you choose to look at things.

If you are truly never happy- and that is not an exaggeration, you could be clinically depressed. Perhaps you should talk to your parents about a consultation with a therapist. If they don't take you seriously, try talking to your doctor.
Please give this some serious consideration.

Best Wishes.

Answer 3

Hiya honey! right, firstly, ignore the people that keep saying that you ought you go to school- it doesn't always mean you have more friends and you often end up a lot less happy than you were to begin with.

I suggest you "study" something you find really interesting, ie, music, sport, even a tv program- something you can have a conversation with.

The next step would be join a local youth group/sports group and make sure you genuinely smile when meeting a new person (sounds obvious, but honestly, makes so much difference) and then ask lots of questions about the people you meet to their faces- seem really interested about them and what they have to say. Make sure you mention what you've looked at before hand, and pretty soon you'll have common ground.

Try and make that person laugh...you probably know all this! but on a serious note, once you've got meeting new people covered, there won't be an issue.. (i should know, I was a complete loner until I was about 13, I could count my friends on my one finger- and she was my cousin. hehe.)
Try and find something to keep you occupied, such as reading or even painting... very often when at home there's so little to do you start to chew things that don't matter over and cry for no reason- there's just no motivation to do anything anymore!

I know totally, you start asking yourself what is the point of getting up as you've only got 2 friends yadda yadda... remember you're totally valued. When I was homeschooled I used to binge eat the entire time out of sadness and boredom. I hated being so down all the time!! It really is too much time to think things over I think, the human brain wasn't designed to be alone for too long- people that live in communities live longer than those alone- fact.

Sooo...find a hobby- read books on people, find common ground and learn how to smile!! (Smiling releases feel good hormones btw, in case you didn't already know!)


If all else fails sweetie, do consider school.

OOO, one other great tip when meeting people is always compliment them on one thing you love about them once you get talking (ie, I love your shoes!)- this will make them feel more comfortable speaking you and walk away with a smile on their face- remember, you as a friend when you first meet someone is to make them feel really good. the better you make someone feel about themselves, the more they'll like to be in your company...it just works that way! anywho, best of luck sunshine! xxx

Answer 4

Well, I don't know much, but I do know this: It's better to be d for who you are than be loved for something you're not.

Try finding a hobby, like I do duct tape crafts. I have a small group of friends, we're friends because we're all rednecks and we just belong together.

Answer 5

Steve D beat me to it! Re-read what he said.

It helps to remember there is always someone far more unfortunate than yourself. Take an inventory of what you do have and be thankful for it.

That being said, hobbies and friends are good things to have, just not good things to rely on for happiness.

Answer 6

GO out and have fun. try going to the mall, the movies,skating. Just go places typical teens your age will go. i was always pretty solo for a while myself. i was 16 before i met my first true friend. good friends are hard to find so take your time, and weed out the fake ones.

Answer 7

well i kno a home skooled girl that had the same problem .. but she convinced her mo to let her go to a public high skool high skool has alot more activities to offer and u tap into ur natural -born talents if u go to a public skool u r sure to meet alot of friends!

Answer 8

get out and meet people, go to a regular school, play a sport or something that will make your brain release substances that will make you feel better

Answer 9

Maybe your other friends have other friends too. Maybe if you meet their friends and hang out with them, you could become their friends too.

Answer 10

go out in the neighborhood...knock on some1's door and ask if theres any kids around your age.......it works!