My two year old son had a birthday in April my mom didn't send him anything for his birthday. My sister came out last week and my mom spent 500 dollars at disneyland to celebrate my nieces 6th birthday.Is this right my husband says I am overreacting, I don't think I am.
2006-07-12 10:44:10 · 15 answers · asked by arizonabrat 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You are definitely not over reacting. My mom is the same way with my sister and i think it is real messed up.
I can never depend on her to do anything for my children. I stopped asking. My sister disrespects her and everything I would never do that, but I am the one that anytime my mom need something she ask me. Figure that
2006-07-12 10:47:13 · answer #1 · answered by ♫†☼☼♥Natasha♥☼☼†♫ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think so either. To spend several hundred dollars on your sister's child and not even spend one cent on yours is way unfair. She could've at least sent a card or a toy. She'll probably say that he (your son) wouldn't remember it anyway. Well, he's two. He's at the age where he will look forward to his birthdays (Look, I'm almost growed up!). If she doesn't do anything for his birthday now or in the future, he's going to resent his grandma and be intensly jealous of his cousins. Have a calm talk w/ mom, tell her you don't expect anything big, just *something*. She may understand.
2006-07-12 17:55:57 · answer #2 · answered by all things mystical 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you aren't over reacting at all! I would be so ticked.
My mom does the same thing with my sister (who decided to get pregnant right after I did). Since then, my mom has showered her with little outfits for her daughter and other things. While she shopped at Goodwill for my son.
We go everywhere in my car (and SUV) because I have the carseat. No one offers to pay for gas. My mom wanted to use a coupon for lunch (a bogo) and didn't even offer me the coupon sicne I was driving. Or, even to buy my lunch.
Selfish.
I so wish I could cut it off sometimes just to give myself a break. At least you don't have to deal with it all the time...
I know it doesn't sound like much, but better than seeing it everyday.
PS: I like the idea of giving mom something from the dollar tree for Christmas. I think I might do something similar if this keeps up! Mean, yes. But, I'm not going to let my son grow up thinking he is less than my sister's kids.
2006-07-12 17:49:56 · answer #3 · answered by Baby #3 due 10/13/09 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are overreacting
parents and grandarents try very hard to be fair and equal in their giving to their children and grandchildren. Why don't you wait to see what hapens when your 2 year old turns 6. If she does not take him to disneyland then you can complain as for the birthday let it go
get in a habit of calling your mom often and reminding her of all upcoming birthdays and anniversaries
and as a consolation - she loves you more than life itself - think about your child how much you love him - she has loved you all your life
2006-07-12 17:51:53 · answer #4 · answered by worldstiti 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not fair at all! However I think you should mention her grandson's birthday in April. Did you have a birthday party for him? If so, perfect way to bring up the birthday party or show her some pictures. But go easy with it. I would feel the same way as you, but its really not worth the stress.
Maybe she truely forgot. You know we have "senior moments". I don't think I would ever forget my grandson's/granddaughter's birthday, but stuff happens. Right??
2006-07-12 17:55:09 · answer #5 · answered by Frecia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I lived through a similar situation when my children were younger. Only in this case it was my Mother-in-law. She very obviously liked her daughters child over mine. I called her other grandson, " The Golden Child". lol. When I saw that she didn't care for my children that much I limited their exposure to her. That saved them from being hurt .
There isn't anything you can do to force a Grandparent into liking grandchildren if they don't. What you can do is minimize the hurt to your children by making sure they spend plenty of time with the relatives that do like them.
A funny thing happened through the years. The "Golden Child" that she so obviously adored didn't seem to care that much for her when he grew up. I always got a silent chuckle out of that. My children grew up not caring so much that Grandmother wasn't nuts about them, but they still have very warm relationships with the uncles and aunts I surrounded them with.
It would be interesting to know if your mother doesn't like your husband very much? If not, she could be seeing your husband in your children, therefor she is transferring her dislike of your husband to the children. Just a thought.
My children looked more like me than my mother-in-laws family, while her favorite "Golden Grandchild" looked exactly like her side of the family. I always thought that had some play in who she favored.
2006-07-13 03:48:55 · answer #6 · answered by pinegreen7 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your son is 2. So is this the way she usually acts? Does she send Christmas gifts etc.... Maybe you need to talk to her and let her know how hurt you feel. Maybe she thinks because your son is so young he won't know the difference. I don't think that it is right, I think she should treat all the kids the same. Talk to her and see what she has to say. Good Luck
2006-07-12 17:59:55 · answer #7 · answered by kourtney_h75 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
to hell with her. my mom and dad always play favorites. it makes everyone mad. i am the favorite because i am the baby.
but still it makes everyone jealous. and its not fair. just ignore her calls. and if she starts talking trash. you got to throw the reason out there for everyone. she might be getting senile. old people are crazy. maybe you should take her to lunch. and then confront her with it there. and get up like youre all pissed off. and walk out on her. make sure you have the lobster salad. and a bottle of wine first. you might not want to leave until after you have desert. also if you can throw some wine in her face. you better meet her for lunch. take your own car.
2006-07-15 01:48:52 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
THAT is totally a bunch of bull crap! You are NOT over reacting at all! She is obviously favoring one child over the other and soon when the kids realize that it will cause alot of hurt feelinfgs! Talk to her and tell her how much what she did bothers you. Tell her exactly how u feel. Dont worry about hurting her feelings cuz she sure didnt care about yours did she? Id feel totally awful if it happenned to me too! ITS NOT RIGHT AT ALL!
2006-07-12 17:55:08 · answer #9 · answered by cstinkerbell6969 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you are overreacting at all! That is not fair! She could have sent him something!! Have you said anything to her? Don't send her a birthday present either!
2006-07-12 17:52:48 · answer #10 · answered by delfin716 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋