How long did you wait to tell your first child that there was a second one coming?

Question

I am pregnant for the second time and just wondering about any interesting and easy ways to help ease a 2 year old from being the only child to being one of two.

Answer 1

At 2 its not a big deal. The harder part is explaining to them why their sibling cannot play with them for the first 6 months or so of life. Once you start showing, tell her. Be all excited and happy and she will too. Have you ever seen a little kid with older kids? The older kids start laughing and the little kid does too. Not because its funny, but because everyone else is laughing. So as long as you act all happy and excited, its a good bet she (or he) will too.

Answer 2

I am all for telling kids once you know.

I waited just long enough to be sure the pregnancy was viable, and then I just started chatting about it as if it were any other thing. I think it helped a lot to act like it was not a big deal, but something that was interesting.

My daughter was around 20 months when I brought it up, and she understood. We talked about whether she would enjoy a brother or a sister. Some days she said she didn't want one, other days she was really into the idea. Later I let her weigh in on names, and she got to see the ultrasound pics. When it was near time for her brother to arrive, we decided to pick out a "gift" from him to her, a little japanese tea set. It was waiting for her when she came upstairs to meet him (he was born at home), kind of like Christmas morning. She was way more interested in the baby than the tea set. She got to hold him and pose for lots of pictures with him, and was just ecstatic after all the waiting. To this day, she still talks nostalgically about how Emerson brought her a tea set when he was born :)

Congrats, and best of luck! ~*~

Answer 3

First if your firstborn is a girl, it will help. My daughter was 2 1/2 when I found out I was pregnant. After month three I told her. Took her to my OB visits so she could see the baby on the monitor and let her participate in shopping for him. On the day he as born, my husband got her a doll of her own so she had a baby to take care of with me. She really transitioned really well, really hated when her brother cried and would get upset if I didn't hold him, let you child be part of it and explain it is his or her job to teach the new baby all the cool things he or she knows. There will always be rivalry, but it will lessen it if the older one feels like it is special for them.

Answer 4

It's better that they know asap, because at 2, the kid prolly will be excited. My brother was almost 7 when he found out I was on the way, which made him really angry because he was used to having all the attention. Chances are your 2 year old will be ok, even if it sounds strange at first. You can start getting him/her big brother/big sister stuff and tell them that you want them to know that they are still loved and that being an older sibling is a special thing.

Answer 5

I never told her. My oldest just thought I got fat...My youngest was born a week before my oldest turned 1 so she was pretty confused. One minute she was in my room and the next she went out in the hall with her grandmothers. When she came back in there was some baby that appeared. They're really close to each other now. At 2 your child probably won't know the difference. I'm not sure though.

Answer 6

I INTRODUCED A DOLL TO MY DAUGHTER THAT I CARRIED AROUND AND PRETENDED TO FEED. THE DOLL BECAME LIEK A SECOND CHILD AND WHEN I HAD MY 2ND CHILD I WOULD HAVE MY DAUGHTER HOLD TEH DOLL AND ACT AS IF SHE WERE CARING FOR TEH DOLL AS I CARED FOR TEH NEW BABY. MY DAUGHTER ADJUSTED WELL. TEH KIDS LOVE TEH NEW ADDITION BUT AT TIMES THERE IS A SENSE OF JEALOUSY AND U JUST NEED TO TRY TO ALWAYS INVOLVE THE OTHER CHILD... AND ALSO GIVE THE OLDER CHILD ONE ON ONE WITH MOM AS WELL. I THEN HAD TWO MORE MY KIDS R CLOSE IN AGE FIRST TWO ARE 1 YEAR 8 MONTHS APART 2ND TWO ARE EXACTLY 2 YEARS APART AND THIRD N FOUTH ARE 1 YEAR 4 MONTHS APART. NOW WE ALL JUST ADJUST WELL TO EACH OTHER AND WHEN THEY ARE SEPARATED THEY GO THROUGH WITHDRAWLS HAHAHA EVEN THOUGH THEY FIGHT WHEN THEY ARE TO GETHER FOR TO LONG OF PERIODS. GOOD LUCK AND CONGRATS

Answer 7

If you have a friend or a family member that just had a baby, go to their house and have your child watch as you hold and feed the baby. Your child will be jealous at first but will get use to it within two weeks of doing it everyday. I did that to my son and when his brother was born he was fine and not jealous at all.

Answer 8

I think I told my eldest when I was about 15 weeks...after the risks of miscarrage had reduced. By then i also had my first scan picture so there was something physical to show him. From what I can remember he was totally intrigued by the fact that there was something growing in my belly and as the bump grew he used to sit and talk and sing to the bump, so by the time she was born he felt that he already knew her. There may have been something in it aswell...he did the same to my third bump, and his baby brother opened his eyes as soon as he heard his big brothers voice!

Answer 9

My daughter is a Little over 2 and my wife is pregnant, we told her right away. Now she's convinced she has a baby in her tummy as well. One thing that is helping our daughter ( I think) is having other young babies around, we watch our nephew sometimes and my wife regularly watches a friends baby that's 4 months old.

I think it's getting her use to the idea of having a baby around.

Answer 10

My son and daughter are 27 months apart and I told her when I found out (about 1 month along). She was able to help pick things out for his room, feel him move, etc. She was excited to have a sibling and loved to lay on my stomach when he moved. I never had any rilvary (until recently - they're now 7 and 9) and she loved to care for her little brother by helping with getting diapers, wipes, toys, etc.

She didn't like having to wait for him though.