From a Christian view point, Is Divorce Wrong if……..?

Question

One spouse is very Christian based, has accepted the Lord as Savior, goes to church and raises the children as Christian. The other spouse is an alcoholic, has told the Pastor they don’t know if they believe they are saved and they never go to church. Because of alcohol the spouse is very abusive verbally to their family. Or scenario two… the unsaved spouse cheats in the marriage.

Please base your answers on scripture...

These are two different scenarios. The first is my own, with the alcoholic husband, and the second is that of a close friend of mine. We are both Christian and feel bound to our marriages because of our Christianity.

Before anyone asks, my friend is a female too.

I left out a lot of details when posting this question, both of our marriages have been 10+ years. My own is going on 19years.

Answer 1

If your spouse is unfaithful, and you want to base your divorce on what it says in the New Testament, it is fine to get the divorce. That is one thing the Bible says is unacceptable in a marriage.

Answer 2

I don't think it is God's intent for someone to be abused. Read the 10 commandments. It's all about treating other people the right way.

If someone in a marriage breaks their pledge why would God want the other person to suffer? How could a Pastor allow harm to come upon a member of his church when it could be stopped? Would the Pastor not feel guilt if the children were harmed by the abusive spouse?

I know you wanted "scriptures" in this response but scriptures can be taken in different ways. I don't think you can alter the purpose of the scriptures which is to help each other.

Answer 3

If the alcoholic spouse is abusive to the point that it will scar the children, then take them and go to a safe house. Divorce is a final solution, certainly not a starting point. Usually when the alcoholic realizes that he or she has reached bottom (in this case, termination of the marriage vows and separation of family), they will come to the realization that they do need help and will make a change. However, if divorce has been discussed as an option prior to this, it will seem like a release and permission to continue to drink, and will not affect them to the point of change. God bless you!

Answer 4

Wow...from the streets of New York, I will try to answer this question.

I don't know much about the Book of Isiah or John or Fred. I am sure they were all nice fellows, even though some of them might have been Boston Red Sox fans. I often wondered where they put the Book of Cynthia or Rose or where do I find the Book of Sonya.

But, there's one thing I do know and feel strongly about. God exists. And He exists through us. I would like to believe I was created by Him and always remember the scriptures/books were written by men.

So, I often look to men, flesh, blood and bones for answers.

I remember an elderly woman tried to climb aboard the Pope-mobile when Pope John Paul was traveling in a foreign country. The poor woman just wanted to be with the Pope. Maybe, to show the Pope photo's of her grandchildren or to tell her friends she sat with one of the greatest men on the planet. Who knows !

The point is...Pope John Paul didn't ask for her green card, didn't concern himself about whether or not she might have aids, nor was there any regard for her being some type of threat (even after a prior attempt was made on the life of Pope John Paul) and he never asked her if she was a Mets fan or good Christian, Pope John Paul simply extended his hand and helped the elderly woman onto the Pope-mobile and together they greeted the crowd. And, he did it without hesitation. He simply extended his hand.

And, so when judgement day comes for me...

I'll save Him the trouble and admit I'm human and probably guilty of everything in the scriptures. So, if a judgemental God exists, I just saved Him the time and trouble. Now, which is it...door number 1...door number 2...or door number 3.

But, maybe, just maybe. He may extend His hand to me and help me up, and together we'll greet the eternal.

So, don't worry about getting a divorce. It may be the least of your problems no matter what it says in Corinthians !

Answer 5

If you read the Bible you will see quite clearly that you have no right to end the marriage. The abuse you and your friend suffer is part of God's plan for you and you just have to put up with it. That's what you get for promising God you would stay with a person forever. If you leave the marriage and get into any other relationship ever you will be committing adultery.

Or you could realize that it's all a load of crap. There is no God that expects you to suffer in this way and you need to get the hell out of the relationship.

Answer 6

DIVORCE AND SEPARATION Most of you, say you believe in Jesus, but the problem is, many of you do not want to obey what He & the Writers of the Bible tell you.

"We may claim to love God, but how we react to what his inspired Word, the Bible, teaches will reveal our true thoughts, even the very intentions of the heart." In other words, you have your on thoughts on the matter, & heck with what the Bible says. But I'm going to take the time to explain what the Scriptures say about Divorce & Remarriage.

God, the Originator of marriage, designed it to be a permanent union. But is there any Scriptural reason for a person to divorce his or her mate—and one that would allow for the possibility of remarrying? Jesus addressed this matter by declaring: “I say to you that whoever divorces his wife, except on the ground of fornication, and marries another commits adultery.” (Matthew 19:9) Sexual infidelity by a mate is the only ground for a divorce that will allow the innocent mate to remarry.

In addition, the Bible’s words at 1 Corinthians 7:10-16, while encouraging marriage mates to stay together, allow for separation. Some, after trying very hard to preserve their marriage, feel they have no choice but to separate. What can be acceptable Scriptural grounds for such a step?

One is willful nonsupport. When getting married, a husband assumes the responsibility of providing for his wife and children. The man who willfully fails to provide the material necessities of life “has disowned the faith and is worse than a person without faith.” (1 Timothy 5:8) So separation is possible.

Another is extreme physical abuse. So then, if a mate physically abuses his wife, the victim may separate. (Galatians 5:19-21; Titus 1:7) “Anyone loving violence [God’s] soul certainly hates.”—Psalm 11:5.

Another ground for separation is the absolute endangerment of a believer’s spirituality—one’s relationship with God. When a mate’s opposition, perhaps including physical restraint, has made it impossible to pursue true worship and has imperiled the believer’s spirituality, then some believers have found it necessary to separate.—Matthew 22:37; Acts 5:27-32.

However, if divorce is pursued under such circumstances, one would not be free to enter a new marriage. According to the Bible, the only legitimate ground for divorce that permits remarriage is adultery or “fornication.”—Matthew 5:32.

The Bible allows only one reason for getting a divorce that frees a person to remarry, and that is fornication (Greek, porneia, gross sexual immorality). If fornication is committed, then the innocent mate may decide whether to get a divorce or not.—Matthew 5:32.

After telling the Pharisees that the Mosaic concession of divorcing their wives was not the arrangement that had prevailed “from the beginning,” Jesus said: “I say to you that whoever divorces his wife, except on the ground of fornication, and marries another commits adultery.” (Mt 19:8, 9)

Answer 7

Ezra 10

More than 100 couples were divorced in Ezra 10. The basis for all these divorces was that Jews had married non-Jews. This biblical example makes marriage to a non-believer a legitimate basis for divorce

"Whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual misconduct, makes her [seem to be] an adulteress. And whoever marries a divorced woman [seems to] commit adultery." Matt 5:31 and 32

Answer 8

I think it is OK if that is what you really want. Remember that the bible was written during a time when women were considered second class citizens. Do you really believe that it is OK for a man to divorce you if you are unfaithful, but that it would not be OK for you to divorce him because he beats you and your children. Not saying that your husband does, but it is just an example since the bible doesn't say that that scenario qualifies for divorce.

Answer 9

I think if the relationship with your spouse is hurting your relationship with God... I think divorce would be okay.

Read this:
"It has been said, 'Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.' But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery. --Matthew 5:31-32

So that means if your marriage is unfaithful, in other words not pleasing to God, it is alrite.

Hope I helped!

Answer 10

I'm not religious, but I put honor before anything else. When you take Marriage vows you promise to forsake all others 'till death do us part.
To me, this is a vow on my honor. It can't possibly be broken. The vow does not say, " "Til divorce do us part". So, to me divorce would not be wrong, BUT sex with anyone else would mean you did not uphold your marriage vows.