what do i do? she won't tell anyone...and it's happened to me b4, except she was raped then killed...what can i do? i want to be with her, and i don't want to see her get hurt, and i think it might be time to call it off...cause i can't protect her...and she won't tell anyone...what do i do?
2006-07-12 05:43:15 · 22 answers · asked by hellhunterxxx 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
not her...one of me ex's...
2006-07-12 05:47:58 · update #1
You are being scammed.
How much money have you "sent" over there to her so far?
Stop it!
Wise up, and find yourself a nice woman where you live.
Good luck.
2006-07-12 06:01:51 · answer #1 · answered by Pulse 4 · 3⤊ 3⤋
The clock is ticking, if you can convince her to report it, it has to be soon while the physical evidence is still there. In the court's eyes (unless there's a witness) this is the crucial moment.
First and foremost, LEAVING her because you feel insecure is NOT the right thing to do. She feels tainted and ashamed, and if you leave her you will only reaffirm those feelings.
She won't tell anybody because she's so scared and so ashamed. Unfortunately, without being present there's little you can do about that. Can you contact one of her family members? Can you contact one of her friends?
She shouldn't have to go through this alone, and perhaps with someone else on your side you may be able to convince her to seek help. You can't do this alone, you have to get someone she trusts to help you. You have to do it now.
The downside of this is, if you do tell someone, it may hurt her relationship with you. She may feel you betrayed her trust, and it may be difficult if not impossible to forgive you. But if you ask me, I think it's worth it in the end to force her to get help than to let this experience destroy her.
Don't abandon her, get her some help. Even if that means calling her local police department and telling them what you know. They'll take it from there.
I wish you all the best.
2006-07-12 12:53:38 · answer #2 · answered by Chryss 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hun, if you break up with her because you can't protect her, you're basically pushing her over the edge. If you can't get on the next flight over there and hug her, then at least be there for her in writing and in soul. Let her know that you love her and you always want to be there for her. Let her know how awful you feel. Encourage her to go seek medical help and talk to the cops. The sooner she gets medical attention, the easier it will be to find the guy and prosecute with a good case. DO NOT BREAK UP WITH HER. Best wishes for you both.
2006-07-12 12:50:00 · answer #3 · answered by iambic_chatterbox 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't call it off now! She needs your support more now than ever! Even if you can't physically be there WITH her you can be there FOR her. She needs a shoulder to lean on.
Even if you lived there with her you might not have been able to protect her from being raped. You can't be together 24/7. Just gently encourage her to report the incident to the police.
2006-07-12 12:48:42 · answer #4 · answered by Cheryl K 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hun if you love her be there for her convince her to tell someone and if you call it off she is gonna feel like she is not worthy of a mans love and that is a horrible feeling..Maybe the two of yous need to discuss a move that brings you closer together so that you can be there to protect her , but hun even if you were close it could of happened so dont blaim the distance just love her and let her know you are there for her...But please beg and plead with her to tell someone the pig who did it needs to pay for violating her
2006-07-12 13:08:36 · answer #5 · answered by shell b 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dear you wrote she was raped and then killed so is she living or not if not then the only thing you can do is try doing good to others in your whole life as a tribute to your gf if you really love her and if she is still living then marry her so that you can be proud that you have done something special--- my view
2006-07-12 12:47:27 · answer #6 · answered by suraj06k 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you so concerned about yourself? Feeling sorry that you can't protect her is not what she needs from you. You can't protect her because you are not there. Get your *** to where ever she is and be some support for her, pronto! I personaly don't think you are good boyfriend material. You would actually consider breaking up with her because you can't bare to see her get hurt? Well that's life. Would you want her to break up with you if something bad happened to you? Are you like 12?
2006-07-12 12:52:46 · answer #7 · answered by Heather E 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
am sorry that ur gf was raped. am sorrier still that your former gf had a fate worse than that. dont blame urself for what happened. it isnt ur fault and you cannot protect somebody 24/7 just because u and she are in a relationship. what you can do is to be with your girl now. be there for her. help her to recover from her trauma. and report the incident to the proper authorities.
2006-07-12 12:49:24 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well let's see here, I am in my home and I have this amazing little thing called a TELEPHONE!!!! Now, any sane person would pick it up and call the ***king cops!!! If you don't then maybe you should be raped. You say you care?.......if you did you wouldn't even ask such a pathetic senseless question. Hope you liked my answer. See source below.
2006-07-12 12:48:02 · answer #9 · answered by dan 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This will hang over you both forever, sadly you will probably want to move on, she's going to be really screwed up for a long time and sex will be an issue.
2006-07-12 12:46:33 · answer #10 · answered by boxing_fan_4_wlad 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to be there for her....if youdo love her. why are you gonna call it off?
at this very moment she needs you more then anytime or anything. and she needs to go see someone. file a report, for it will never bring her peace.
2006-07-12 12:46:41 · answer #11 · answered by hawaiiang99 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋