ok here's the deal
i'm 15 and nieve (or however u spell it)
I went out with this guy (named ricky) for 9 months but on may 14 we broke up and on july 1st he asked my out again.
like all the time we were seperated I knew i still luvd him but i was unsure about how he felt about me.during the time we were seperated we remained friends. now like i have a pretty good idea that he still liked me too. so hopefully things go well for us in that state..........but the real problem is that my dad HATES him!
He can't stand him? all these months hiding and my dad hasn't found out. my bf makes good grades & he's a good student but how do we tell my dad about "us" (he has even threatened to hit me if he "finds out that i'm going out with Ricky") or should i break up with him?(i couldn't do that. it didn't work the first time how could i brake up w/ him again)
thanx 4 being patient & reading my prob. plz w/b asap
thanks again
2006-07-12 05:28:57 · 59 answers · asked by erika P 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
well first of all...why does your dad hate him.he didn't do anything wrong but break up with you for the first time...he made a mistake and then ghe wants to fix it up so he could be with you again and make everything better then they used to be...if your dad hits you for going out with a guy that he doesn't like then you need to report him to abuse...don't let him hit you...if you want to talk mor then you can e-mail me...go to my page and send an e-mail then we can switch e-mails on it...really don't break-up with ricky...he's here to support you..(ricky)
2006-07-12 05:34:40 · answer #1 · answered by ttanna14 1 · 1⤊ 4⤋
If your dad doesn't like him, there is probably a reason. Probably a good reason! Dads were young boys and young men once even if yours isn't so young now, and they know what boys are thinking. He probably has an idea about what Ricky is thinking. Your dad must believe you are threatened by Ricky in some way. He must feel that you are in danger by staying with Ricky. Most likely, he believes Ricky will try to take advantage of you. There is also the possibility that your dad believes he doesn't deserve you since he broke up with you before. Also, you said the break up didn't work last time. Well, neither did the relationship. It's been my experience that break ups happen for a reason. Soon either you or he will be reminded of that reason and break up again. Always remember that ex's are ex's for a reason! People don't just break up due to a flip of the dice. Whatever caused the break up last time is sure to cause it again...or misery. Whichever comes first!
2006-07-12 10:46:30 · answer #2 · answered by JACQUELINE 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi . . . Well I know this is hard for you cause a while back I to was in the same position. I am 23 years old and when I was 17 I was madly in love with what is now my ex husband. My parents hated him. They always told me to stay away and so I would sneak around all the time. Next thing you know I'm pregnant and my parents literally took me to his house told him if you love her like you say you do than get married. They left me there and we got married couple of months later. Well unfortunately he was ever thing my parents said he was. I thought he was it and couldn't be with out him but turns out I would have been way better without him. Just really think about it. Why doesn't your dad like him? I'm sure your dad wants the best for you and your only 15 you have so much time to go. Once you start college there are so many people your gonna meet and tings that you are gonna wanna do but you won't go to far tied down!
2006-07-12 05:43:57 · answer #3 · answered by jennifer a 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you believe that your dad really will abuse you in any way after finding out that you are still seeing Ricky then why would you tell? You either need to just be friends with they boy, or listen to your father and stay away from him! You are 15, so you will have many bf's before you know what love is really about. Good luck!
2006-07-12 05:42:20 · answer #4 · answered by Jen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Someday, you'll come to see why your dad hates him. And you'll look back and say 'wow, my dad was really right about that.' Parents have a perspective you don't have as a teenager.
Of course, you can't and won't see it now. I sure didn't when I was a teenager. So do your best to make the decisions you believe in, and stay safe.
Do remember though, that when it comes to the men in your life, you can be assured that your dad is the one who is always looking out for your interests. Much more than 15 year old boys named Ricky.
2006-07-12 05:35:09 · answer #5 · answered by justwebbrowsing 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
(it's spelt niiave)
Anyway, I'm 15 also. Keep in mind that you WILL eventually break up with dear Ricky, but you have your dad for a LONG time. Before telling him that you two are dating, go to him (while he's in a good mood) and simply ask, "hey I was thinking and I thought of Ricky. What do you have against him?"
Get answers first. They could be good, or, like a million other dads, just have a "feeling".
2006-07-12 05:33:48 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should speak to another adult about your father's violent threats. He should under no circumstance be threatening to hit you.
About the guy, well teens break up and get back all the time. My highschool boyfriend and I were together 4.5 years but we broke up at least 4 times sometimes for up to 4 months. Your dad probably wants to protect you from being hurt emotionally, but ultimately you have to make the decision whether or not you feel that getting back together with Ricky is a good thing for you.
2006-07-12 05:32:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I remember when I was 15, this is usually a very hard time in a young girl's life. I know this is going to be hard for you to hear right now at this stage in your life. But your father knows best. I am not going to tell you to end your relationship with this boy. At the age of 15 we tend to feel very strongly about things, and what I say is don't take this relationship to seriously.. And do something that could possibly damage your life forever. It doesn't matter if the boy makes good grades. He could still be bad for you. Take your time with life and don't try to grow up fast. At this age let your main focus be getting ready for college, and what you want do with your life. Please don't let anyone and including this boy get in the way of that. Please don't let him pressure you into having sex, and if he has guard yourself against AIDS and getting pregnant. Both can end your life's dream. If this young man really is a good person, then you can wait and build your relationship when you both older and fully understand what a commented relationship means. I don't know your father, if he is vilolent person. Telling him is not going to be good for you. But if he is not try sitting down with him with other people around that you trust and talk to him and tell him how you feel. Don't tell him alone, or maybe you should wait till you are old enough to move out. You are fifteen and eight-teen is not far if this relationship last that long.
If you need more help:
http://www.extension.umn.edu/distribution/youthdevelopment/DA2787.html
2006-07-12 06:06:46 · answer #8 · answered by Angel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off, there is no love involved here. You are only 15, and like you said, naive.
Secondly, there usually is a reason why parents don't like that particular someone. It could be that your father is overbearing, but I doubt it. Ricky may just be honor student of the year, but my neighbor was a great student too and he went to jail for armed robbery.
So listen to your father. If not for him, for yourself. As much feeling as you have for this guy, you are still VERY young and there will be plenty more guys that come your way even if you don't think so. I personally guarantee it.
2006-07-12 05:37:36 · answer #9 · answered by Low Key 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, I know you like this boy and feel very strongly about him.
But one thing you will eventually learn in this life is that your life
will always reflect in some way...the moral decisions that you
make and there are always consequences for actions. You need
to sit down an talk with your father about your feelings. If he is
any type of an understanding father he will listen and would never
hit you. If your father is adamant about you not seeing this boy
you must listen to him for now. You may not like it, but for the
time being you have to follow the rules that your parents set for
you. Honor your mother and father....following by moral rules
will ALWAYS pay off because there is nothing that will hurt you
in doing this....on the other hand much pain and problems will
come if you go in the other direction. You have your whole life
to meet the right guy....you only get one father and if he loves
you he will be reasonable...if not maybe seek counseling because
threatening to hit you is wrong for HIM to do to you...Best wishes
sweetie!!!!! And remember parents are not always right. The
only thing you can do is be empowered by doing the right things for yourself....and respecting the decisions you make...if your parents are ever abusive to you....seek counseling. But do not
ever cry wolf in this regard just to get your way,as it is too serious an accusation to throw around to get your way do it
only if something is truly wrong.
2006-07-12 05:42:32 · answer #10 · answered by ljean 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As much as you should be honest maybe you shouldn't say anything to your dad just yet. You are both young and anything can happen, your dad loves you and doesnt want you hurt. If you and Ricky are meant t be then just be patient in a few year you'll be 18 and for the most part be free to do what you wish.
2006-07-12 05:35:53 · answer #11 · answered by Sketch 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋