My mother in law tells my brother in law everything I say or do and somethings make him mad. I feel as if I have to tip toe around them both. The fear of him hating me sucks because his g/f is Carring my daughters 1st cousion and I am scared he wont let them see each other. What should I do. I don't Talk about him or his g/f like gossip about them I just voice my oppion about things and I feel like I can't even do that ariund either one of them for the fear of the action they might take. Please help
2006-07-12 03:50:36 · 13 answers · asked by mommy2faithat19#3 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Don't talk to your mother in law about the couple. If you want to mend your relationshjp, just bite your tongue. It may be hard. But if you need to vent, talk to your husband about it. But explaine to your husband that you are just venting and as a couple, would like your venting to keep between the both of you. Maybe you can invite your brother in law and his girlfriend over for dinner and just talk about good times. Don't bring up anything negitive, and don't bring your mother in law up in conversation, unless its something positive... make the whole night a positive experience.... You have to remember, "blood is thicker then water" there is a rule of thumb. NEVER talk bad about a mothers son.... because in the mothers eyes, the son is always perfect. Sometimes my husband makes me so mad. But I feel I can never talk to his mother about it because like I said... "son's are always perfect" and the mother will ALWAYS take the sons side, regardless..
Good Luck- Have a nice dinner with the family!
2006-07-12 04:01:06 · answer #1 · answered by LO 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
First watch what you say to the Monster-in-law. She may be twisting things you say.
Second calmiy aproach your brother in law, maybe just tell him you have no idea what may have happened. And could you guys talk it over.
If not write a short note basically asking the same thing, wait for him to respond to you.
Other than that tell him the truth and DON"T over defend youself.
Tell him the truth and drop it. Don't bad mouth anyone or point fingers. It will help your defense.
Best of Luck
2006-07-12 04:17:00 · answer #2 · answered by american_angel068 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
stop voicing your opinion to anyone that has contact with your bro-in-law. It doesn't matter the difference between gossip or opinions.. If your in law hears something through the grapevine.. it is all the same. Just vent to your friends in another state or town.. I have the same issue. I do not believe in some of the ways my in laws live.. (that's an understatement) but I just act nice around them and then vent like a crazy woman to my friend in Dallas.. Seriously.. stop the opinions to you mother - in- law!
2006-07-12 03:57:59 · answer #3 · answered by LJ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't control the way other people act or what they say...but you can control what you say and do. Keep in mind, no is ever going to do everything to your expectations. You, just like everyone else are going to have to live and learn by your own mistakes. Just because you don't like what they are doing - doesn't really give you the right to interfere. I know how hard it is to keep quiet - my mother in law and I didn't speak for years and she didn't see her oldest granddaughters for that same amount of time. You have to let people, whether loved ones or not, make their own mistakes - no matter what you think. Good luck
2006-07-12 04:17:39 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't voice your opinion about them around either of them anymore. As far as the girlfriend carrying your daughters 1st cousin, next time just say she's pregnant. If they still come around you now I wouldn't worry about whether or not they will allow the kids to play together. Just stop talking about your brother-in-law to your mother-in-law and things will get better
2006-07-12 04:02:18 · answer #5 · answered by purpleama456 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You must remember what makes people different are opinions. It is not your job to say your opinion about what is going on unless your opinion is only about you or your children. My opinion about my some of my in-laws, or even my family would start a family war and end relationships.
So, unless your opinion is flattering, maybe you should think twice (or more often in my case) before you say anything. I tend to say only positive outside of my home...I want no room for hard feelings. This lesson took me ten years in marriage to learn and hopefully my hubby will get the lesson too.
2006-07-12 03:59:26 · answer #6 · answered by Fantasy Sarongs 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Thats Just The Way In Laws Are.
2006-07-12 03:58:13 · answer #7 · answered by mks 7-15-02 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay i had the same problem with my mother-in-law and my brother-in-law! I just had to learn to hold my tongue! It's all i could do, even though it was hard. Just don't tell either one of them anything about the other, even if it's not gossip!
2006-07-12 03:55:51 · answer #8 · answered by flutter_by_baby20 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is up to the child's parents who can and can not see them. Not a boyfriend! And why let in laws bother you? You did not marry them so what they feel or think should be irrelevant.
2006-07-12 03:56:44 · answer #9 · answered by SL 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can only control what you do. If you're not acting like them, you're already a step ahead of them. You can confront them with how you feel. Or you're just stuck ignoring their rudeness
2006-07-12 03:54:42 · answer #10 · answered by Kristen 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋