but they don't listen to me. They say " when we ask you for food, you feed us. when we need to be held and petted you take care of it for us. You love us and accept us for who we are. And, you give us shelter from storms and cold. we will keep you as our god!" Is there any blessed catfood I can give them that might help put them back on the right path? But, I do see their point. God has never done any of those things for anyone I know.
2006-07-12 03:17:54 · 41 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
thank you, I will try to take them to church again. but last time I got kicked out because they can't tithe anything but cat toys, and they refuse.
2006-07-12 03:21:48 · update #1
this is indeed the ultimate in alternate atheist proves there is no god
2006-07-12 03:21:34 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋
Sorry, Rachel.
Everyone knows that all cats are evil and thus going to hell, no matter whom they believe in. :)
[Corollary: Only dogs go to heaven.]
---
Seriously, though, let's tweak the analogy a bit:
Let's say you actually created the cats, in order that you could all be together and enjoy each other's company. (That was the entire reason you made them -- to spread the joy.)
Note: You are also a "cat" yourself, since you modelled the cats on yourself.
Now, some of the cats give you that catty "screw you" flick of the tail and go off by themselves and otherwise snub you. That really bums you out, since they're not enjoying the party and for some reason are deciding to miss out on what it means to be a bunch of cats in one big house together.
Some cats even sneak out the window, where you know dogs lurk and cars zoom and lightning strikes and sick boys with M-80 firecrackers like to torment poor cats -- so you know they're just causing a lot of pain and suffering for themselves, as there is no other house where cats can feel as safe or fulfilled as your house.
You're partly offended by the ridiculousness of what they're doing, but worse, you are grieved because you have lost their company forever and all they are doing is bringing suffering upon themselves... and it's hard to watch/imagine someone you love suffer.
But what can you do? Cats will be cats. Some will choose to leave, and you need to respect it. Forcing them to stay without the right attitude will just ruin the party for everyone. Control is not what you are about, after all.
Is that a great story, or what? (Ironically, much better than stories about cats who only blindly follow things based on their own hungers and cannot think at all for themselves -- as the cats in this version do, albeit sometimes to their detriment. I think my cats have more inherent dignity than your cats.)
I do have a confession to make, though, and apologize for my earlier joke: I'm a cat person, not a dog person. :)
2006-07-12 03:32:34 · answer #2 · answered by Jennywocky 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you wait for God to hand you food, love, etc. on a silver platter, you'll be waiting a while. God works through people to love, feed, and care. As for your critters, have you considered taking them to a "blessing of the animals" service? Some churches, I know Episcopal ones do, hold a service occasionally. Also, your local humane society may host an event where many faith traditions come together to bless animals.
2006-07-12 03:23:43 · answer #3 · answered by jazzmina11 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u lost me when u made the point of cats r talking 2 u, and u talk back....well, to answer ur question...i dont think u'll go hell cuz they worship u...im not an expert on the Bible, but when God made the 10 commandments He said that He doesnt want His ppl worshiping gods other than Him....if u r loyal 2 Him, u dont have to worry about anythng...but if ur still uncomfortable, talk 2 a priest or go to church more often, or something
2006-07-12 03:45:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What?!! You're not god?!! Oh my, my life has come to a screeching halt. All I have ever known and the meaning of my entire life has been shattered. What will I ever do? Why oh why did you have to reveal this to me. Couldn't you have let me live in my stupor. I would have happily died and gone to hell for you. Now I must face the fact that I'm all alone there's no one here beside me...
2006-07-12 03:22:32 · answer #5 · answered by Walt C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Check some Red Dwarf (BBC Comedy). See what happens when a whole society of cats worship a man.
2006-07-12 03:21:01 · answer #6 · answered by Applecore782 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have to agree with Witchy. I have two cats, and they both think I am the one who worships them. I feed them, pet them, clean their litterbox, all at their command.
Sometimes even I wonder if I am their mistress, or is it the other way 'round?
2006-07-12 03:22:35 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
So you're god! Just feel good about it. In the meantime, could you just resolve the Middle East crisis? Bless you.
2006-07-12 03:21:35 · answer #8 · answered by ElOsoBravo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe you are not their god, but a patron saint. It'll be fine if they "idolize" you, but I doubt the cats will go to hell, otherwise, there would be so many pets in the same situation.
2006-07-12 03:20:28 · answer #9 · answered by prasino_4 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG that is the funniest thing I have ever read. I wish I could give you 100 points!
2006-07-12 03:20:14 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
They are your god. They are actually demanding worship from you.
Dogs have masters, Cats have staff.
2006-07-12 03:19:44 · answer #11 · answered by Blunt Honesty 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋