Should Christians Remain Single?

Question

Christians seem to condemn all forms of sex as a sin. They are angry against porn shops, sex on tv, sex in the movies.

A pastor even repented for "looking at the girls", as if looking was a sin.

Another pastor told me that thinking of sex or of naked women is a sin.

Another "fellow" christian told me that if you look at women it's a sin unless you are to marry her. I mean how can I know the future, what if I don't marry her in the future, my looking at her now would become a sin in the future.

Some Christian litterature even condemned flirting and hanging with the opposite sex.

It would seem that if we recollect all the Christian teachings, EVERYTHING that regards sex, romance, flirting, fantasy, desires etc. Are all EVIL SINS.

But then they encourage you to marry and have children.

How will you find a mate if it's a sin to look for one. How will you have children if it's a sin to have the pulses that give you a *****_.

Should Christians remain single ?

Answer 1

Yes, so they won't reproduce anymore and in a matter of some 80 years that absurd religion will be history.

Answer 2

Do you really believe Christians should not marry? Now if that happened we would deprive society of our christian off springs.
I am a christian woman who was once a young girl and I dated and I followed the teachings of God. I am human and I had feelings the thing is I never acted on those feelings until I was married. My husband never acted on those feelings until we were married. I do not believe in looking at porn or any other type of material that would cause you to have impure thoughts or actions. When you date you should try and date girls who are in the same mind frame of life as you are. When you have impure urges if you say over and over "He that is in me is greater than he that is in the world.;" than he will help you make it through. We all fall the difference is a Christian picks themselves up, prays and has learned a lesson. We don't give up because we love the thought of home, family, love, marriage and I should know we have been a faithful couple, and still in love for 36 years and counting. Good Luck, now go out and find a Christian mate.

Answer 3

Christians will tell you all sorts of stuff about sex. But here is my one piece of advice, trust the Bible! Get your opinion from there. Yes, some of the things you mentioned are sins, but it is not as extreme as you think. As a Christian, make sure that you set boundries. Don't do anything (to a girl you are not married to) you wouldn't feel comfortable doing in front of your parents. Some Christians that I love and respect say dating is bad, some don't think it's a problem, and others suggest courting instead.

What I have found is that you don't need to do all the things that are "the norm" in dating. Keep things cool. Save as much as you can until you get married. (It makes a very nice wedding gift!)

Answer 4

The pastor who said that to you probably had BIG issues of his own. In my understanding of the bible looking is OK but lusting, wanting and slobbering is bad. From personal experience with men I am not sure if controlling lust completely is possible. I guess it would be a constant struggle and a reason for many to give up. I like having a companion and being married myself but there are some people strong and smart enough out there to fully dedicate thier lives to God that are an inspiration.

Answer 5

Yes AND No.

You see, it all depends on the individual. It says in 1 Corinthians 7:8, 9 Now I say to the unmarried persons and the widows, it is well for them that they remain even as i am (single) 9 But if they do not have self-control, let them marry, for it is better to marry than to be inflamed with passions.

Here it says in plain english: If you can't help but continually masturbate and think of women and sex, then its better to get married to remove these potential road blocks to your future goals of eternal life : ) Its just THAT SIMPLE.

However, IF you have the ability (or very little sex drive (god love ya)) then its actually BETTER to remain single because life is easier in that there's less to worry about and you can serve God in far more ways than a married person with children and responsibilities.

So, HE leaves it up to you and what YOU can handle and won't judge you, no matter which you decide.

ps this stuff about lust in your heart. Just a note, its NOT a sin unless its been acted on. God doesn't judge whats in our hearts unless we DO SOMETHING WITH IT. That's why its dangerous to dwell on bad thoughts, sooner or later, you will let your guard down and act on them. Actions define you to God, actions create the sin. Eve thought about eating the fruit, she didn't sin until she ate of it.

Answer 6

Sex is not a sin it is a gift. Sex is intended for marriage. The marriage bed is undefiled. Not everyone is called or cut out for celibacy.Looking at a woman is not sinful. Staring at her and purposely thinking lustful thoughts is there is a difference. Now granted the way women are dressing now a days is sinful itself as it makes it harder for men to not think this way. Even having sexual dreams is not a sin. One can not control ones dreams.Pornography cheapens a woman and ones self.

Peace of Christ,
Debra

Answer 7

No Christians shouldn't remain single. If you are a christian you need to seek God for a mate because if you look yourself you won't find the right one. Only God knows the secrets of someones heart and how they operate shouldn't you trust him to find the right person for you. Believe me he won't set you up with someone you can't get along with. That's how I meet my future husband and we're getting married in the spring. You don't have to go out and sample everything that you might think is right because that is sin to look upon a women lustfully. Just pray for the right one and i grantee you'll be satisfied.

Answer 8

The Apostle Paul's advice to the church at Corinth:

"I do, though, tell the unmarried and widows that singleness might well be the best thing for them, as it has been for me. But if they can't manage their desires and emotions, they should by all means go ahead and get married. The difficulties of marriage are preferable by far to a sexually tortured life as a single."

It's not certain whether Paul himself was married or had ever been married - if he had a wife, she preceeded him in death and he spent a good deal of his years as a celibate man. Paul argued that, while marriage was an appropriate and worthy life choice, those who had a "gift" for celibacy should remain unmarried and devote their life's energies toward spreading the gospel, as he had. So, it seems that Christians should remain single, if they have the will and the gift to do so.

For the rest of us (myself included), we are to remain chaste in a married relationship that welcomes and accepts children as a gift of God. I'm with you - that's easier said than done. In our society, in which marriages are not arranged and we are on our own to find a mate and sexual images are seemingly everywhere, the temptations of lust are at times overwhelming.

The fact is, there's no magic solution to this situation. Remaining sexually pure is one of the most difficult things to do in our society (or in any society, I imagine). I think the best thing you could do would be to find someone a little older than yourself with whom you can open up and get some straight answers to your questions from someone whom you respect and whom you trust. Yahoo! is not the place to find that kind of person. Good luck to you.

Answer 9

I used to hang around with a group of Christians who believed that it was sinful to kiss before arriving at the alter! I think that borders on insane! Although we waited until the wedding night to "do the deed," we certainly played around a bit. (He was a virgin, I was not. His only fear was that I'd "compare" him)

I guess it depends on the couple what is and isn't appropriate. Many Christian couples wouldn't have been able to stop when we did, and if they were planning to wait until the wedding, wouldn't want to play around with the temptation.

I don't agree with "not looking" at girls/guys, especially those who are appropriately dressed. Even hard-core Christians slip up occasionally. God forgives. And He'll reward you greatly if you not only ask for forgiveness, but also repent. (change your ways)!

Answer 10

The act of sex should be confined to marriage. Matthew tells us that we commit adultery in our hearts by looking on a member of the opposite sex with lust inour hearts. "Adultery" is a sexual act (and according to Matthew 5, a sexual thought) with (or towards) someone whom we are not married to. Paul says if you burn with passion, then be married. I have a boyfriend, we don't have sex, and we fight against lust. I plan on getting married, having sex with my husband, and one day having children. What you seem to be talking about is sexual immorality. For that I find the most encouragement in 1 Thessalonians 4.

Answer 11

No!! It is completely up to you. The bible states to remain single but that if you want to be with a person--then it is right to be married. (I guess so that you will not commit fortification :)

So, yes it is natural to be looking for a partner. Look at all the couples at churches and even pastors are married, so there is your answer. Procreation is important, but that is not what every couple needs or wants. That is totally up to you.