what should i say to a girl when their mom dies?

Answer 1

Tell her "Sorry to hear about your mom, if there's anything I can do to help, like if you want to talk or anything, let me know."

Or just say "Sorry to hear about your mom."

Answer 2

I think if I were the girl whose Mom died, I wouldn't want someone to tell me they know how I feel or something sappy like that. The best thing that you can do is be there to listen to her and be a shoulder to cry on. Just being there can speak more than any words can say.

Answer 3

I had this problem to deal with myself and it actually works you have to think like a child and most children want to have something to say to there mother. My suggestion as I did and hoped for the best was to let the child write her mother a letter telling her mother to always watch over her and let her sign it I LOVE YOU MOMMY and send it up on a firework and tell the child that when the firework goes kaboom it means that the message was recieved and answered. I did this many years ago and the child actually thanked me as a teen ager and said it was settled in her mind that all was well with the deceased I would NEVER consider going into explaining Death to a child under the age of 12

Answer 4

Just tell her that you are sorry, and ask her is there anything you can do for her. Just listen. Then, keep checking back ever few days for awhile. Sometimes - at first you are so numb that you can't even think, and then later on when the funeral is over and all the people have gone back to their regular lives - it will all come crashing in on you. THAT is when it is nice to have a friend to listen and hold you.

Remember this - don't be afraid of tears. So many people are afraid when grieving people cry. Just hang in there.

Answer 5

One article suggested that actions speak louder than words. That is why in olden days, the pioneer women would bring food to the bereaved - without asking if she wanted them to - and clean her house and do necessary things, but may be beyond her thinking and planning capacity - due to her grief.

That way someone is there to hold her when she cries. Or listen when she talks. Or reminds her that her mother was a beautiful person that will live on in her memories.

If nothing else - google grief and memorize the stages of grief, so that you know where the girl is at, and where she is likely to move to - emotionally speaking. I don't know them in order.

Answer 6

Hi, you didn't say if you were really close to the girl or that you just sorta know her. The best thing you can do is send her a sympathy card and write on it that you are sorry, if she needs anything to call you and your number. If you call her, say something like "I just wanted to say hi and see how you were doing, if you wanted to talk" If you see her in person, go right up to her, don't avoid her, and say, "Hi how are you doing?". Alot of people don't know what to say so they avoid people and say nothing, that really hurts the one grieving. You can say something like I understand how you feel, but don't say I know how you feel, no one knows exactly how others feel they can only try to understand based on what they know or how they felt in a similiar situation.

She's going to have a huge hole in her life, she may be shocked, angry, depressed, and feel very alone. The best you can do is be her friend, be there, call her every so often to see how she is, maybe invite her to do things to try to fill the void. If people keep busy it helps. Encourage her to talk about it but don't push her.

Answer 7

What not to say,sorry you lost your mom i know how you feel.So many people say things like that ,noone nowes how it feels unless they did loos there mother,so if you still have your mom,tell your friend IT must be the hardest thing to go threw and tell her if she needs to talk or cry you will be there,or be there if she just wants to talk about anything to help her keep her calm.Its nice that your on here woundering what to say,to bad she dont see this so she could see somone cares a alot about her.

Answer 8

Tell her you will be glad to listen. Be her friend. NEVER tell her you know how she feels, even if you have lost a parent. I lost my dad when I was 15 and I hated people telling me they knew how I felt. Also, never say it will be better with time. Everyday you are with out that person it is harder. You forget how they looked, smelled, talked, and all the little things. You do come to grips with death but you always know the hurt.

Answer 9

just be there....theres nothing much u can do to make the pain go away....but it will mean alot if u just be there and lissen....my bestfriend lost her mother and sister in one day when the Earth Quake hit Pakistan and i had practically spent most of my life with this family and my besfriend is married and was 7 months pregnant when this tragedy happened but i just know it was really hard to even pick the phone up and say am sorry about your sister and then after a few hours they found her mothers body ....but i just tried to be there as much as i could even now....i keep calling her and asking her all the time.....trust me just always try to keep in touch and be there and comfort her....may GOD make it easy on her and give her peace of mind all my prayers are with her....and am sorry about it....

Answer 10

Tell her you're really sorry and that you're there for her if she needs to talk....and then just leave her be unless she approaches you. That's the most you can do without possibly offending her : ( Try not to bring it up after that.