whats wrong with me? i didnt do anything wrong i tell him i luv him all the time i kiss him i hug him and he still cheats on me? he cheats on me with my best friends and every1 else.. i feel like a total *****...can u just try to cheer me up or sumthin plz..
2006-07-11 12:39:08 · 21 answers · asked by lipstick 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
and i find out right when he asked me to marry him...
2006-07-11 12:53:36 · update #1
there is nothing wrong with you..... its him thats got the problem
its the whole grass is greener syndrome and he is a jerk for treating you that way, how stupid is he to throw away you who obviously cares for him and loves him so much
you are so much better than that hun, go and find yourself a man that wants to be with YOU..sadly they say you dont know true love until you have been burned....heres hoping you dont get burned to often :)
2006-07-11 12:45:19 · answer #1 · answered by sinnedfairy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you asking? You know what to do...what would you advise me to do? This 'man' treats you like this when everything is new and nice. Say you married him. So you've got a couple of children, a mortgage, you're saving up, got some debts....what on earth is he going to do to you then and ho on earth does he think he is. These friends that he cheats with are as bad as him so just walk away from all of them and consider yourself very very lucky. He taught you well. Love many, trust a few, but always paddle your own canoe!!
2006-07-11 20:07:52 · answer #2 · answered by Jackie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He obviously doesn't have any respect for you whatsoever, and the fact that hes has asked you to marry him only means he completely takes you for granted. He regards you as a faithful little puppy he can leave at home when he goes on his escapades and when he has had his fun and comes back you'll be waiting at the door to jump in his lap. If you marry him you are basically signing up to be his housemaid. You will hate your married life and leave him in ten? twenty years? You'll have to look for a new partner in your 30s-40s. Get rid of him now. NOW! It is your only option.
But I bet you love him. You absolutly adore him otherwise you wouldn't have given him so many chances and wouldn't be even concidering his proposal. You have your genes to thank for this.
Its the whole 'Alpha-male' thing. The way he acts and treats you says is higher in the pecking order than you and women respond to that. Its the same with beaten wifes always being so devoted to their abusive husbands (till he beats her to death) and the way a loads of people fancy others who aren't interested. (Boy fancies girl but she in love with another boy but he finds her clingy and has the hots for someone else etc). Women lower in our social hierachy seek approval and are attracted to those they see as higher. Its the same with your 'bestfriends' they wouln't have slent with him if they didn't think they could walk all over you.
Sorryto be so blunt but there is no nice way to say stuff like that. 'Cruel to be kind.'
You need to start a new chapter of your life. Get rid of this asshole. Spend a bit of moneyand get a makeover, (meybe a new job too?) become a new you. A stronger you. Some one not to be messed with. I know its not easy but just pretend at first. Be a bit cheekier and work up. Get a ***** switch you can turn on when you need to. Watch some strong women films (the last seduction/ erin brockovich) for inspiration.
And when you start dating again you need to get the mindset that YOU ARE THE PRIZE. No matter what. They have to work for your affection. Give the ones you like a little bit of encouragement but not to much. Remember its the person with the lowest social value who seeks affection. Make sure its them who seeks it from you. You always value and appreciate something you had to fight harder for, right?
Try a classy and affluent look and going out in the posher part of town, rather than the local 'chart music meat market' (maybe you already do, I can't know) to meet someone. Maybe occasionaly go for lunch on your own in the cafe in Waterstones (or what ever books shops you have). Who know who you might meet. A crowded cafe makes it okay to take a seat at a table with a cute guy on his own reading something interesting. A smile and a bit of eye contact is all you need to do. Its up to him to initiate the conversation win you over.
As for your friends. What they did is dispicable. Your best friends should be your rock, your support. Find some proper ones. Whether and how you should get back at the old ones, i think is another question.
Good luck.
2006-07-12 08:28:37 · answer #3 · answered by Deep Heat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is my two cents.... you've definately done nothing wrong to him to make him do anything like this, but i would agree with everyone on the idea of dumping him, as for your friends, I'd be pissed at them for not keeping their hands off him as well as for letting him get in the sack with them. if he can't stop being a player then he doesn't deserve your love and you should move on. But this is just my two cents, take it as you would like. don't let a complete Pig ruin your life because it will only make things much harder in the long run. Oh and don't fall for the sympathy gimmicks either, we men do have a ton of BS Lines we could use as pickups and a ton more to weasel out of any situation. (In my case I choose not to use em because it's not my way.)
2006-07-11 20:03:53 · answer #4 · answered by Austin S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think the cliche " one track minded" comes into play here deerie. nothing to do with you..ur most probably absolutly fabulous and right for him but he cant deal with that cos another clcihe..he has " a commitment problem".
In actual fact those cliches are jus guys blimming excuses the fact is most of them dont know theyve got good thing till they lose. it.. want my advice tell him hes a loser no matta how much it hurts you to do so....and whatever you do..DONT CHEAT BACK!!!!! this guy loves you im certain he does...sit back go with the flow hell come on running back to ya...promise!!
2006-07-12 03:47:54 · answer #5 · answered by dixiepixie1904 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you're making him too sure of your devotion to him.
Try a few "Cor, he's nice" or "I wish YOU"....followed by 'looked like Johnny Depp' or 'had a 6 pack' or 'weren't such a cheating b*stard' or anything to make him feel less secure in your devotion to him!
Hopefully a few, well placed, remarks will make him focus on YOU, and realise how lucky he is..........if it doesn't then you should keep on looking - he isn't the one!
2006-07-11 20:12:28 · answer #6 · answered by franja 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
excuse me but what the **** r u still doing with him when u know he cheats!I wasted 5 years of my life on a tosser who kept cheating.he will never change,if he loved u in the first place he wouldnt be cheating on u,and not more thanonce.dont waste ur time onhim its time u will never get back
2006-07-12 00:31:04 · answer #7 · answered by Sherry Baby ( Ethan's Mama ) 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For something to be wrong with you, in this instance, you would have needed to have done something wrong. So ask yourself, have you? If your answers are no, I haven't, then there is NOTHING wrong with YOU, There is possibly something wrong with THEM. Hold your head high and tell yourself you're not wrong, maybe find a friend who'll tell you that too.
2006-07-11 19:52:02 · answer #8 · answered by Dick s 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dump them all, don't waste your time on total a**hole like them, they have no respect for you. Trust me there are much better people out there for you. In the end there's nothing wrong with you they are the problem not you!
2006-07-11 19:47:19 · answer #9 · answered by quamig 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh I would say that there is nothing wrong with you however us males for the most part are very much like dogs. Most of us will hump anybodies leg that is willing to stick it out there. Its in our DNA
2006-07-11 19:47:49 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋