my mother says i am lazy because my 3 year old is not potty trained yet. am i a bad mother? am?

Question

am i not doing enough to try and get him potty trained? i work with him every day. but he just wont do it. is this my fault or will he eventually do it on his own? she made me feel very bad. like i was neglecting him or something. what age are they usually trained? any tips would be GRATEFULLY appreciated.

Answer 1

i am not sure of what advice to give you because i am actually going through the samething. My son was almost fully potty trained but stupid hurricane katrina through things completely off but he was still using the potty while away just all of a sudden he just stopped, i am still trying to figure this thing out. I just had surgery and we are going on vacation and we are still trying to potty train through all of that. I wish you luck .

Answer 2

No you are lazy about it as you said you work with him every day. Boys do take longer that girls and everyone has thier own time. Make sure he has is own special potty just for him. Ask him severl times a day if he has to go potty. Praise him when he uses it but don't scold when he has an accident. That will cause pressure and he will have more accidents because of it. There was an episode on the Dr. Phil show awhile back about a way to potty train in a day. Get on line and check it out, I would try it if I had a child to potty train. It's an all day thing but fun at the same time. If you can't find it and want to know more email me as it is a long explaination to put here if you are not interested in it. Good luck!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 3

My youngest son is 3 1/2 and is now being potty trained. The more we pushed the more he was strong willed and rebelled. We tried the sticker chart, we tried the m&m's, we let him pick out his favorite character on the underwear and nothing worked. We backed off and introduced a new method. We have an older boy who likes legos. So we went to the store and let our youngest son pick out a set of legos that he would like put together. Now everytime he goes potty in the toilet he gets to put peices of the lego together. IT has worked. He has stayed dry for 4 days now, and we have been doing this for a week. For our first son we bought a toy(like an action figure) that he really wanted and put it in the bathroom, if he went potty and stayed dry for a week, then he got the toy. When he stayed dry for a month he got a 'big' toy. Seeing the toy in the bathroom helped him knowing that he would get it. Not just taking mom and dad's word that we would buy the toy after he stayed dry. And he was 4 when he was fully trained. Don't worry about what others think. It's not being lazy, it's about his timing and finding something that will motivate him. Just get creative. Hope this helps.

Answer 4

I think that by 3 he should be potty trained by now. My son was potty trained completely by the time he was 28 months old. Do you use pullups? If so that may be your problem. I would only use them when we were going to be away from the house for those just in case we can't get to a potty. At home or relatives house I would make him wear underwear. That way if he pees or poops he will definetly realize that he doesn't like that feeling and start using the potty. It might mean a little more laundry for you but he needs to be potty trained. Good Luck!

Answer 5

No, you are not lazy or a bad mother. My son is 26 months and not nearly potty trained. He goes right before the evening bath. Otherwise, he just wants to play. My friend's son turned 3 in March and is not potty trained. Everyone I talk to says they will do it when they are ready. You might try some rewards for sitting or using the potty. If your son refuses, don't push it. Also, you might try using the pull-ups with the wetness liner. That way, he will feel when he is wet. Don't give up. It will happen.

Answer 6

DON'T FEEL BAD!!!!! YOU ARE NOT A BAD MOTHER!!!!! Normal age for potty training is between 2-4. Don't stress it will only make things harder on both of you. Everyone I talk to says boys are harder to train than girls. I have a little boy who will be 3 in August. He is potty trained and this is how we did it.
-We first made a star chart. (4 rows of 5)
-Everytime he went to the bathroom he got a sticker.
-After 5 stickers he got a toy.(dollar store toy)
-After he filled his chart (20 stickers) he got a big treat. We used a trip to Chuck E. Cheese
My son caught onto the system VERY quickly and within 2 weeks was potty trained.
Also if you are home don't hesitate to put him in regular underwear. If he has an accident it is more uncomfortable. Just be prepared for a lot of work.
Good Luck, and remember make it fun for him.

Answer 7

I cannot believe some of the people on hear are so damned rude. First of all boys always take longer than girls. And believe me when he sees his friends going to the potty he will feel the peer pressure to do it on his own. You are not lazy, as you said you work with him every day. Your mom is being rude. I have heard of a lot of boys who are not fully trained until they are 4 or 5. Don't worry your doing fine just give him rewards for sitting on the potty, try the doctor phill method. And don't make it frustrating for the both of you. You don't need other peoples approval of how to raise your little boy, only you know what is best.

Answer 8

Doctors have told me that kids learn eventually when they are ready. If you are working with him, then don't worry about it. Some kids take longer than others. Every child is different. Both of my kids learned in daycare, they saw other children going on the potty and didn't want to be the only one not. DId you get him/her their own little potty? That usually helps as well.
Good luck, and don't let people tell you are a bad mother. You are just fine!

Answer 9

You are not the only one with that problem and it does not make you a bad mother. Pampers recognized that issue a few years back and came out with a size 6. These are specially designed for toddlers that do not take to potty training. If pampers did not thing there was an industry in this they would not have made the larger sizes.

Answer 10

I'm the mother of three boys 26,22, and 20. I worked really hard with the first two and had them trained by two. It was very hard. and included alot of tears and frustration and "mess"- haps along the way. I waited till my third son was 3 to even introduce him to the "POTTY CHAIR" . He trained himself, and had ONE accident during the night. I call that good parenting and a ready child. No heart aches for any of us. HMMMM....lazy? I guess I wasn't too lazy to change diapers. I think of you rush a child, the only person being trained is the parents; to watch for signs and the clock. Just my opinion. Don't stress. There is always more than one way to do ANYTHING. It's not written in stone. Hang in there!

Answer 11

My 3 1/2 year old son isn't trained either. But I have 2 older kids and they eventually figured it all out! Try a reward system or try peer pressure from cousins... neighbors... It sounds mean, but that is how my oldest learned to ride a bike... because the little neighbor boy learned first and my son got jealous.
Or take him to a public pool... get him all excited to go and then make him have to leave because they only let potty-trained kids go in!