I have tried the whole... "stop looking and they'll come find you" and " talk to them as friends first and then look for potential dates" but man is this guy helpless... he is playing in the special olympics and he's trying to bat in the major leagues and he has no idea of why that won't work... and I get to hear all about his girl problems so please please please... any suggestions for how to help him without hurting his feelings would be greatly appreciated.... thanks...
2006-07-11 04:00:55 · 32 answers · asked by Jonny Propaganda 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
he has been denied consistently for the last 1.5 years... and I am no Don Juan but I can see girls squirming to get away from the guy at the bar... I have seen him clear dancefloors... I have seen all the blatant lies to stop talking to the guy... I am not judging, I am trying to help....
2006-07-11 04:22:44 · update #1
unfortunately, there is no way to convince someone of that. Maybe it's a good thing that his confidence level is at an all time high. He may endure some harsh blows but he will eventually learn on his own. The best thing to do would be encourage him and be supportive of his decisions. God bless him. Who knows? Maybe one of those major leaguers may actually have a brain and date someone not only for their looks.. stranger things have happened.
2006-07-11 05:22:19 · answer #1 · answered by Amy H 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sometimes a friend has to do the most challenging thing imagine. This mean tough love; but with tact. Give him prime examples of his behavior. Let him understand that you see outside the scope; that he can't see the forest for the trees. Let him know as a friend how much you care about him and only want the best. That you share the same goal as single men looking for the special person. I hope things work out for you and your friend. In addition; as an after thought, I hope he's not dating outside his league to prevent him from finding success in a relationship. Some people actually don't think they deserve to be happy in love and will sabotage themselves or the relationship all together.
2006-07-11 04:32:48 · answer #2 · answered by Swordfish 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
At the time I met my husband I thought I was way out of his league ( but I was 16 and he was 19, so teenagers think that way, adults shouldn't be so superficial!) We have been together 7 yrs and married 6... and 2 kids along the way. You never know what someone will find attractive about another person. Maybe a very attractive successful woman will see a quality in him that you can't see. If not, he'll have to learn. Let him try to date who he wants.
2006-07-11 04:06:33 · answer #3 · answered by Me 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Instead of stopping him from pursuing these "out of his league" type girls why don't you give him clues on how to get those types, how to make him more desirable to them. Let him know that "in general women like that look at college degrees, home ownership, personal grooming"... and then tell him, "If you want a woman like that you need to first, enroll in college, start to pursue a more financially climbing position, read GQ and find the latest styles" etc. Just give him the knowledge and hope he either does the following:
- Thinks it's too much and stops
- Changes himself to be a stable, financially dependable and educated heartthrob... lol
Hope this approach helps, good luck. As my man is a manager at UPS and we have 3 children, he had big dreams with me, but I enjoyed molding him alittle. Tell him to be moldable for love!!!!
2006-07-11 04:07:13 · answer #4 · answered by dreamsykel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not about league there are no leagues unless its $$$ wise.
a pretty girl is just as likely to go out with a ugly guy or fat or what ever as long as she likes something about him weather its money, personality, humor etc. besides if everyone thinks that this girl is out of their league and don't try then that poor girl will be all alone so I see no reason why guys shouldn't try to hook up with girls who are out of their league. Besides if hes not afraid of rejection why stop him its good learning experience.
2006-07-11 04:09:07 · answer #5 · answered by Jeff L 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him alone and let him keep trying. Sometimes love just happens and not all good looking girls are as shallow as you think they are. There are some out there who are looking for a guy to love them with all there hearts and who want a guy to treat them like more than a piece of meat.
2006-07-11 04:38:23 · answer #6 · answered by jane d 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is truly hung up on this girl, he probably will not listen to you anyway. In fact he will probably resent you for making the suggestion no matter how true it may be. And that may cost you your friendship. You may just have to accept that he is a big boy and will have to make his mistakes. If you are still around when he falls down, maybe you can be gracious and offer him a hand back up.
2006-07-11 04:10:37 · answer #7 · answered by quikzip7 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Even guys from the special olympics, batting in the majors, get hit by pitches every now and again.
2006-07-11 04:03:40 · answer #8 · answered by Dan w 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't tell him anything! Why do you label him? What exactly is 'out of his league' anyway? I didn't realise there is classism when it comes to love. I like the geeks - they make me laugh and are more interested in us girls than themselves! Just you wait, he may find a stunner and take the wind out of your sails! Let the guy work out who is best for him himself.
The only advice you should give him, is to be himself - everbody's got their someone.
2006-07-11 05:25:37 · answer #9 · answered by Pandora 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What happens if one of those girls accepts a date? Maybe you should not let your insecurities get in the way of what your friend is trying to do.
He probably needs to hone his skills a bit
2006-07-11 04:07:46 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋