Athiests: Have you ever been attracted to a Christian girl?

Question

Or did the fact of her beliefs TOTALLY turn you off.
Some christian girls are really cute and sweet.
My friend who is an athiest recently fell head over heels
for one, he said something about her "innocence factor " it ended badly unfortunately because she wouldnt
give up the V card.

If you found yourself in love with one what would you do?
this is simply curiosity and not to start a fight.
Just curious.

Answer 1

As an atheist, I hold no particular grudge against any belief system. I believe that if two people are in love, their faiths (or lack thereof) should not affect their relationship in any way.
However, I know that it is a part of many branches of Christianity that a Christian may not be involved with someone who is not. I, myself have been coldly dumped more than once for not converting to the faith of the girl I was seeing. I've also been turned down flat for being an atheist.
I respect "The V card" as you put it, and would never demand that it be given up. A man who demands that is not a man who loves the person he's with. Your friend sounds like he's less concerned with the girl's faith than he is with the fact that she won't "put out" for him. If that's the case, then she's better off without him anyway.
I commend the girl for being open minded enough to date someone outside her faith, and I hope her bad experience with your friend doesn't ruin her impression of all atheists.

Answer 2

Yes. But you confuse judging with "judging solely". To give an analogy, do you judge people solely by whether they shoplift? Sure, shoplifting probably lowers your opinion of someone and if a stranger who was a potential date went into a long spiel about how much they love shoplifting, it might be a deal breaker and you might assume that person was generally a bad apple. But, I am sure you concede that some shoplifters must have other positive traits. They might volunteer, rescue kittens from trees, whatever. When we know someone better, we look at a wider range of their individual qualities, but it a fast elimination sort of situation like dating, we do not want to waste our time once red flags are raised. As to whether religious beliefs are a deal breaker in dating-it does depend on what they are. Religious belief is a pretty broad category that includes the Buddhist whose most religious activity is some sort of yoga as well as a Fred Phelps type. Some of those things are an automatic no, some are a tolerable flaw. Also, as a genderqueer bisexual, religion from people I think may be perceiving me as a cis hetero raises additional concerns about whether or not they will respect and acknowledge my gender and sexuality-because I will accept nothing less there. Religion can be a pretty good proxy about homophobia and it does make me automatically suspicious in some cases. Also worth noting: I am a terrible liar, so my disdain of theism will probably not be well hidden-meaning that even if I do not leave, they might. "I don't let my religious views get in the way of my social life." That is an easy thing for someone with a socially acceptable majority religion to say, but not so much for anyone else.

Answer 3

9 out of every 10 girls in my country are catholic.
19 out of 20 girls in my country believe in a god.

In other words, most girls I've dated were catholic and that wasn't a turn off. Even though I had an experience with a "fundi" girl I liked, but it took me one date to get the "turn off". I was rejected by another girl because she wanted a man "who loved god", later she married and now she's divorced, it was a sad story that of her. Most girls that I dated and were believers had high hopes that I'd convert, despite I used to be a believer before and they had a hard time trying to understand why I was an atheist, it seems the idea gives some people a headache.

What do I expect in a relationship? Mutual respect. If I can't respect a person, I won't start a relationship, and if she couldn't respect me, I'd quit. My best relationships were with nonbelievers though, my relationships with believers always caused certain conflicts, for obvious and understandable reasons.

All my agnostic / atheist / humanist friends have dated and some even married believers. No biggies.

Answer 4

Yes. My last girlfriend was a Catholic. It didn't bother me in the slightest and we never argued about religion either. It wasn't an issue.
If a girl was very puritanical, it would piss you off, but otherwise, most 'Athiests' are happy for people - girls - anyone to have whatever beliefs they choose.
PS: I do not catagorise myself as an Athiest - I simply don't believe in god and think that organised religion is a social evil. Rather, I would describe myself as being 'non-religious'.

Answer 5

Yes, I've been attracted, and still am. And for about the same reasons your friend was. But to fall in love with one would be a different story. I'm not sure what I'd do. I don't think it would work out, no matter how badly I wanted it to. We just come from two different sets of philosophies.

Answer 6

My first boyfriend, while not being an atheist, had serious issues with the Catholic church. (I am Roman Catholic.)

We tried to avoid the issue as much as possible, and he often told me that he admired me for being strong in my faith. Eventually, however, we proved to both be too opinionated, and I was offended by his statements nearly every time the topic came around to religion.

It entirely depends on the willingness of the people to be accepting and respecting of each others' beliefs, no matter how different they may be.

I imagine it might make things difficult when raising children, though...O_o

Answer 7

Yeah I had that situation too, although I'm not an atheist, just not a christian. After I found out how psycho she was over religion and morals I just tossed her back into the sea. There are a heck of a lot better fish out there, especially without MAJOR hangups. Even if I had had sex with her, a lifetime of missionary is not my idea of fun.

Answer 8

I hope you weren't suggesting that your friend speaks for all atheists, re: getting into the christian woman's pants. In my experience, it's those who were frightened with "abstinence only" nonsense who are the most intrested in getting to the forbidden fruit.

Openness is the healthiest attitude towards sex, and that doesn't mean "free love" and abortion.

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My big concern is kids. I can defend myself from religion because I have the brains and the evidence to protect myself from it, but kids don't. Unless she was willing not to have kids, then dating a christian is a waste of my time.

I wouldn't ram my evidence down her throat and have enough respect for a woman not to try, and a christian woman would be wasting her breath trying to convert me. (Back when I did date christian women, that all rudely thought they could pervert me to their religion.) But there is NO way I would ever let kids of mine be exposed to pedophilic brainwashing, and I couldn't justify - legally or ethically - preventing her from having access to or teaching the kids. The risk to their mental state is too great.

If she isn't an atheist, agnostic, or buddhist who deals in the real world, I'm not interested. I want marriage someday, and I want kids.

Answer 9

In high school I was very attracted to a girl that was Catholic. I even went to church with her several times. Eventually, I had to admit to myself that our personal beliefs would not allow us to have a life together. We remained friends until we both went away to university, and then lost track of each other. I still remember her as someone that I respected, and was very fond of.

Answer 10

Probably have. Most people in the country I grew up are _nominal_ Christians, whether or not they actually are true believers.

I'm married to a Muslim now. So clearly it's not that big a factor for me.