my mum is concerned that im not engaged to my boyfriend after 8 months is there a time limit for engagment?

Question

as this is causing resentment between me and my mum but my realtionship with my boyfriend has not altered. im 27 and he is 36 and i love him very much but we dont have enough money to get engaged plus we are also not ready as im still studying at uni are we doing wrong by not getting engaged yet?

Answer 1

My sister did the same thing to our mom. When my sister was in college, she started seeing this guy and later moved in with him. After seven years of living together, they (finally) got married. I asked her once (before they got married) why they didn't take the next step. ......
Answer: They were comfortable with their current living situation.

I've always respected my sister's decisions, and this was no different. So she waited until she was in her early 30's before tieing the knot, and he is a few years older than she.

My advice to you, is to wait until you are both ready before moving to the next phase of your relationship. There isn't any time limit that I know of for an engagement, at least not these days. It used to be six months after getting the ring on your finger, to your wedding day. Times change, and your mum should know this all too well. After all people have been known to get married after six hours (Vegas style), or much longer like my sister did.
The only person/people who know how long, and when to get engaged are the two of you.

Answer 2

I think your mum is concerned coz she is anxious to see u get married and have a baby, am i right? But now u are only together for 8 mths. i believe u are not that stable yet. Both of u are in the age of getting married already, that's why your mum is worried.
U can have a talk with your mum and tell her know your concerns(like not stable yet, not enough $$$, u are still in Uni, etc..), share with her your plannings and when u are planning to get married. I believe she will understand.
Well, when u are stable, let's say after 1.5 yrs, u get get engaged, to let your mum get comforted. Then try to get married before u are 30. I think getting married after 30 is quite late lol.
It's all up to u 2, but never push or rush, otherwise u may bring along a lot problems

Answer 3

I think you're doing just fine by not getting engaged. Do it when you and your bf are ready, not before. Your studies are very important too. Have you considered asking mum why she wants you to get engaged so badly? Learning her motivation will go a long way to understanding why she's pushing for the engagement.

Answer 4

Of course it's not wrong.. You are old enough to make this decision by yourself and your boyfriend..When you feel ready then do it.. dont get pressured from your mum because maybe you will regret it.. Follow your heart and talk to your mum.. Tell her that you are planning to do so soon but not yet..

Answer 5

You shouldnt be concerned about what your mother thinks, and yes shes your mother but she should understand that you have to be 100% sure that you are ready for that type of commitment and if your not its ok to take your time. Many people wait longer than 8mths. Just follow YOUR HEART and make a decision that will make you happy because its for you and no one elses

Answer 6

Don't let anyone pressure you into anything you are not ready for, cause marriage its a HUGE step rather wait. You will know when the time is right

Answer 7

While eight months is not to soon to get engaged, what matters most is that you both are ready to take that step. I would wait another eight.

Answer 8

Only you and your boyfriend know when it is time. Enjoy your timetogether, build your relationship. Don't worry what your mum says.

Answer 9

is not your mom's business, and there isnt a limit. is when you, BOTH feel ready. this is why people get divorced, they just act like animals, or under pressure!!

Answer 10

When you and him both feel ready is the best time.