Christians, what type of stones should I use when stoning my unruly child in accordance with the bible ?

Question

"And they shall say unto the elders of his city, This our son is stubborn and rebellious, he will not obey our voice; he is a glutton, and a drunkard. And all the men of his city shall stone him with stones, that he die"


I wonder which christian will be fist to excuse tis by using one of the following excuses :

1) saying that it has to be taken in context

2) saying that it has to taken in the context of the time it was written

3) saying "oh, but that's the old testament that doesn't count anymore ......... except of course when it can back up our arguments"

4) being able to randomly choose which bits are to be taken literally and which bits are to be taken as a metephor.... as the need arises.

5)You need faith

Answer 1

I prefer river pebbles for stonings, blood washes off easier

But here is something more to ponder

his is from the Humanists of Utah website.
Why Can't I Own a Canadian?
October 2002

Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a radio personality who dispenses advice to people who call in to her radio show. Recently, she said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22 and cannot be condoned under any circumstance. The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by a east coast resident, which was posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative:


Dear Dr. Laura:


Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other specific laws and how to follow them:


When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odour for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbours. They claim the odour is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?


I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15:19- 24. The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offence.


Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighbouring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

I have a neighbour who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?


A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?


Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?


Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?


I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?


My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? - Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)


I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Your devoted fan,
Jim

Answer 2

It is true in those days that is what they do. Even in certain parts of the world if you steal they chop off your hands. Talk nonsense and they cut off your tongue. You know stuff like that. But today the world have come up with a different approached. Something call Law. We have LAW to punish bad behaviour. It's something like hand phone. We can either use the big big hp that we used those days or you can use the latest. Why use the big black phone when you have nice small stylish phone with better functions. But till today many people I know still tells me that the big black phone that we used those days has the best clarity and till today no hp is better then that. But I still don't see anyone using it. The world changes and we need to change for the better. Try talking to your child and there is also many other solutions. Children will be children and they are naughty sometimes. All of us are and if our parents were to follow strictly then we will not be able to see today. Because I'll probably be stone to death.

Answer 3

Happy Thoughts?

Answer 4

Before Jesus that is how it had to be, but after Jesus there is now A Grace in the land there was not before, Now Jesus says to forgive those who traspass against you, Jesus who is the second member of the God head says to forgive others and that would certianly include a son. In Matt 6 in the model prayer is says Our Father which art in Heaven then it says something interesting, forgive others "AS" you forgive us, you see God forgives us AS not because we forgive others He uses our stick we use to use to decide how we forgive, and at the end of that prayer Jesus says if we do not forgive others there traspasses which are sins done on purpose, than God will NOT forgive us. free bible lessons www.itiswritten.com talk to me [e-mail] God bless ya

Answer 5

Stones of Loooooooove

Answer 6

Read the New Testament!

Answer 7

You should use one of those large stones from a goldfish tank. That way you can kill your child with one rock. I'll steal you one from my neighbors tank when I'm over there throwing it to his wife. When he asks me about it, I'll tell him I didn't do it.

Answer 8

You do realize that the son they were talking about was over 18, and they were just pissed that he wasn't married. It isn't meant towards children

Answer 9

You should use the stones that are left after you are stoned to death for your sins.

Answer 10

I prefer sandstone----it's easy to get and shatters when you throw it hard enough. Remember, spare the rod, spoil the child