Why can I not handle this?

Question

My dog that I've had for 16 years just passed away. I knew it was coming, and thought I would handle it fine. But, I'm not fine and it hurt a lot. I feel like a wuss. Everybody loved my dog, a Jack Russell Terrier named Charlene (Charlie for short). People say it's just a dog, but she was really like my best friend. I couldn't handle getting another dog, at least not for awhile, but how do I get myself under control here?

I appreciate all the wonderful answers and caring concern. This was the real reason why I got on Yahoo Answers, just couldn't get myself to ask about this until now. Thank you all.

I'm sorry, these were such wonderful answers, I can't pick one favorite. Please forgive me.

Answer 1

Your dog was your dear friend, and a part of your family. You have the right to grieve the passing of such a dear friend, just as you would a human family member..
God gave us dogs to teach us unconditional love.
There are not many people who can love such as a dog loves, as people tend to judge, and dogs never will.

Just take one breath at a time, and then one minute at a time..and soon the time between tears will be less.

Answer 2

People who don't know and love dogs cannot understand why we who do get so attached to them.

I can honestly say that a dog is one of the few creatures in this world that will love you honestly, unreservedly, and without any expectations from you.

You've lost a dear and treasured friend. It's totally OK to grieve and mourn, just as you would for a friend with only two legs. And it definitely does not make you a wuss. It makes you human.

A few years ago we had to put our dog down, and I though the grief would kill us. We swore we would never have another dog because we couldn't handle the thought of going through that again, but last year we adopted a 3-year-old Pomeranian Eskie mix. I really cannot believe that we went 2 1/2 years without all that love and joy in our home!

Give yourself some time, because that's really the only way a broken heart can heal. Let yourself grieve, and be kind to yourself, and realize that there are others of us out here who have been down a similar road. In time, you'll feel a bit better, and when that day comes, you can think about getting another dog.

If you want to talk to me about this, please feel free to contact me through this site.

Answer 3

I had a collie get hit my an ambulance 2 years ago and we were best friends. Im still not over it. Your not a wuss. U just miss your best friend. You must have loved her a lot. I did to my dog. His name was buddy. we did almost everything together. When I went to the store he came and waited outside for me. When people walked by he would want them to pet him. Everybody knew him and loved him. Broke everybodys heart. Then I thought to myself if Buddy was here he would want me happy. So That day I got a new puppy her name is Lassie. She is a collie too. She acts just like Buddy. She loves going every where with me. So just remember that Charlie wants u to be happy. Your not a wuss. You just really loved her and u miss her a lot. She will always be with u. And Im just a 14 year old so I guess people think that Im a kid and I get all upset over this stuff but Buddy was my best friend. I would do anything to have him back, but I know he is in a good place now. I know he is in my heart and he will always be there no matter what. So just remember that Charlie is still with you where ever you go.

Answer 4

I think you are allowed to cry if your dog died. Many many people that either don't have pets or just don't like animals do not understand how it affects someone when there pets pass on. A pet is like a child, a member of the family. I have a dog and if something happened to her i would be devastated and I have only had her for 3 years. I understand where you are coming from. You tell those people that you will mourn the loss of you wonderful dog and then you do it. I know you will feel better with time and them you will find another to love too. GOOD LUCK.

Answer 5

Dont worry you are not the only one in the world that morns their pets.

If you are sad it is because your dog was a big part of your life for 16 years that is a long time to have a dog. could you imagine loosing a 16 year old son. It is easy to become attatched to a animal. If you love animals you are most likely a decent person. It is good to grieve the loss of a loved one even if it is your dog. Dont rush out and get another dog , no dog could ever take the place of Charlie.

Answer 6

She was like your daughter. People who truly love their animals go through grief like they do a human death. If you need it, please get grief counselling, I doubt the counsellor would laugh or ridicule you. My family lost a dog who was 14 a couple of years ago, and two cats who were 18 and 20 about four years ago. We are still grieving. I've also lost a little female rat who was 3 and a half years old. It will take time, and don't let people push you through the process of grieving. It is your own journey. The choice about getting a new dog is your own. If you can't bring yourself to do it, there is no "rule" saying you have to. There is nothing wrong with basking in the love that your girl gave you. You are not a wuss for feeling how you feel. There are others out there who love their pets just like human friends or family. You are not alone :).
My family and I still believe our girls are all with us, in spirit, reincarnated as our current broods of furries.

I really really hope this helps you.

Answer 7

don't feel like a wuss, u said she was almost like ur best friend and someone whos best friend who just passed away is not going to move on quickly. just take some time to remeber her and all the good times you had together. if u wanna get ur mind off of her, try finding a hobby or something that will take up your time. though it may take a while to move on, she will alway remain in you heart and i'm sure she is looking down on you now and not wanting to be sad. i'm sry for your loss, don't be afraid to bad and show it, she means a lot to you! :)

Answer 8

My sympathies to you for the loss of your friend Charlie. JRT's are awesome little dogs (and frequently wonderful little pains in the butt :-), and 16 years is a good long time. You obviously took very good care of her. There are many websites dedicated to helping people and honoring their pets; try the words, pet, loss and grief in your favorite search engine. I also highly recommend reading "Coping with the Death of Your Pet" at HSUS and the Rainbow Bridge poem (see links in the Source List below). - g^2

Answer 9

I've tried that..losing a pet. I haven't gotten over them completely yet... I still cry when I really think of the moments I've spent with my dogs.... don't ming what other people are saying. They don't know how much you bonded with her... a dog we've had for 8 years passed away just last year....

Answer 10

She wasn't "just a dog". I felt the same way when my 17 year old cat passed. I also knew it was coming and had to choose to put her down. That was like killing my child. Talk to someone who knew her and understand how you feel. Share memories with them. Talking really helps. But it still takes time. I really feel for you! Good luck!