My ex is a JERK. What do you think?

Question

Ok. So he leaves me, after a year long relationship, for this chick, of which i found out he'd been going out of town to visit atleast once a month...I"m not over him, but I don't show it to him. I try to accept him loving someone else, and I"m pretending that I want to be his friend. We still go to church together because we're both on the worship team, he the drummer and I the pianoist. Now the idiot, every time we speak on the phone, constantly speak about his new girl friend. How he loves her, can't wait til she moves in with him in a few weeks, he can't wait to get her pregnant, and marry her, and if all that isn't painful enough for me...He tells me there's no way i could've made him as happy as she does, and that I was no where close to being on his level...and she is. As a friend, I listen, and tell him I'm happy for him...I have nothing negative to say to him or wish for him...But why is he throwing all this in my face? why would he want to hurt me even more? I need advise.

I try to be his friend because he need help...
I believe in God, so I know I'll be fine...

Answer 1

Let him know that he is right - you are nowhere near his level, you deserved so much better than a cheater and you let him go to be with someone who is as selfish and hurtful as he is. Don't let him use you as a sounding board for his new relationship. You need to stop torturing yourself - quit talking to him on the phone!!! Having a baby will bond them together for life, and when it doesn't work out you will be the one who got off lucky. He sounds like a real jerk, and you are letting him use you. Telling you those nasty things is hurtful, and I think he knows exactly what he is doing. Nobody is that clueless. Don't be his friend, it is unhealthy and hurtful for you. You can't move on with your life if you are still hung up on him, so the phone calls have got to stop. Seeing him at your worship team is too much contact, in my opinion. But you need to stand up for yourself and quit letting him put you down with his hateful comments. I wish the best for you in this difficult situation.

Answer 2

I would talk to your preacher about it for starters. Secondly, he is not too christianly if he is going to move in with her and knock her up before they are married, I would tell that to the preacher too, and finally, if he was cheating on you the whole time, in the big picture you are probably the lucky one. I say hold your head up high, being his sounding board, and go your own way, if he makes you feel uncomfortable at church activities, tell him to keep his distance, if he does not tell the preacher. Finally, as Judge Judy once said, sometimes the best revenge you can have on a homewrecker is to let her have him!!!!! I think that applies here!!!Men are like buses, as soon as one leaves another is on the way, good luck!!!!

Answer 3

He's not your friend. Its rare for exes to stay friends. He's throwing it in your face to make you feel bad and to make himself look/feel good. He's really insecure of what you could pull against him. You're probably gonna have no trouble finding a better guy then that and then he's gonna make your ex look like ****. You need to stop talking with this guy unless you have no other friends, seriously. If you don't then as soon as he breaks up with her, hes gonna try to do everything he can to get back with you and repeat history.

Answer 4

1.) Stop letting him talk to you that way - tell him you're DONE with the relationship. 2.) Get him OFF the worship team. (he doesn't need to be a "role model" for others if he's trying to "impregnate" a girl that he's just met and wanting to move in with. 3.) Yes...he's a JERK!

Answer 5

Well you dont act like he hurt you to him, so he might think hes not hurting you. You need to stop talking to this guy on the phone and being his friend. You need time to heal and your not going to get it doing things that way. It is ok also to let him know he hurt you and how you feel.

Answer 6

Girl, I have dated five guys exactly like this. I know how you feel. First tell him how you feel. If that doesn't work, tell him off and get your friends to help. If he's still a jerk, (this may sound mean but) either blackmail him or goive him the old one two.

Answer 7

he wants you to be miserable and he has something wrong with him
dont let him do this because even though he thinks it doesnt get to you and you dont show it, your still setting yourself up for him to hurt you... from now on go to church but you dont have to speak to him. Done answer when he calls and when he does tell him your busy or tell him why you dont want to talk and maybe hell talk to you and stop doing it

Answer 8

Tell him he is a jerk and you were trying to his friend but he isn't being very friend like to you. Bragging and breaking your heart and telling you, you aren't worth **** to him is just another way for him to have power over you. Don't let him. take your dignity and walk away. Church is for worship, not self degredation.

Answer 9

He has self esteem issues, by putting you down and propping this new girl up he is trying to make himself feel good for what he did, he doesn't really deep inside himself want to be your friend, he wants to use you to boost himself up, he knows going to see that girl while you were together was wrong, and he is trying to make it right by saying she is better than you, if I were you I would do whatever I could to avoid conversations with this person before he really destroys your self esteem.

Answer 10

only forget with regard to the guy. How previous is he, 10? he's so immature! practice others which you have admire for your self. yet heavily, i do no longer desire to be a hypocrite as a results of fact i'm fairly evil myself... in case you have any grimy secrets and techniques which you be conscious of roughly, threaten him. do no longer actual unfold the rumors yet tell him if he would not shop his seize close, he's going to get it.