we have been together for almost 10 years. I love her very much. She was caught by me with one of my (best) friends.
2006-07-10 14:54:38 · 21 answers · asked by ffej123 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
hopefully you have enough love to forgive her. it wont be easy to do and i wouldnt blame you if you couldnt, trust is not something that can be turned on and off like a tap. once its lost its hard to get it back again.
you both have been together for so long, and you have a son together. its totally up to you what you do but i think your relationship is worth saving if you can
both of you should seek some counselling but im sure you can work things out.
2006-07-10 15:02:54 · answer #1 · answered by vanessaoz 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmmmmmmmmm! You caught your girl doing the nasty with one of your boys. You want to know how to deal with it? First off you whatever you do with the advice that I am about to give is your business and hers.
1.) You can forgive her but don't forget what happened. If you catch her again afterwards leave and take your son. Get her tested before you hop in the bed with her for pregnancy and std's.
2.)Forgive her don't look back and handle your business don't touch her, don't hold her, keep her at arms length and talk to her about general things concerning your son and the running of the household and when you get it together leave her and take your son.
Good luck to you and what ever you choose but you can do better cause you deserve better. A man that doesn't cheat is gold to any woman that likes that in a man.
2006-07-10 15:07:07 · answer #2 · answered by calmlikeatimebomb 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she feels that after being together ten years and you still aren't married...chances are you won't get married. I would think that she feels like the relationship is not going any further than it has and doesn't feel committed. Just because you have a child doesn't mean that you should stay together. If she will sleep with your best friend once, what are the chances that she won't do it again?
My advice would be to continue to love her but love her from afar. You will get over her. Once a cheater....
2006-07-10 15:04:50 · answer #3 · answered by gmommy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she doesn't really love you all that much. if she did, she would never cheat, because she would know how much that would hurt you. and the fact that she cheated with one of your best friends is even worse. however, sometimes, even if women care about their husbands/partners they can cheat because they don't feel appreciated, and their repeated attempts to get that appreciation and attention from their partners has failed. but, i think this is rare, and in situations where it is happening, its pretty obvious and still doesn't excuse the behavior. anyways, to answer your question, how you 'deal' with her depends on whether you feel this was a one-time thing and whether you feel you can forgive her and trust her again. If yes, then you need to have a very honest talk about why she cheated, and maybe even go to counseling if necessary. If not, then move on. Basically, as you can tell from my long-winded reply -- there's no quick answer to this question.
2006-07-10 15:02:04 · answer #4 · answered by shwayta 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If she is cheating on you then her say she "Loves You" I think she may be hiding behind that statement so she has you for your son while she plays behind your back. If she continues to do this
it proves she has a problem and may not be deserving of you. Talk everything over with her and see if you both can fix the problem.She may also be counting on the fact that you will stay because of your son.Good Luck!!!
2006-07-10 15:04:58 · answer #5 · answered by Linda R 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dump her and him. You may love her but if she really loved you she would not cheat. I know from experience they never stop and don't give me this she's different because she's not. Find someone who loves you for you and you will never have to worry about her fidelity. You sound like a good guy and believe me there is a huge demand for your kind in the single circles. Best of Luck.
2006-07-10 15:01:23 · answer #6 · answered by Mama C. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to say but if she really loved you should would not be cheating on you. And she probley is laughing inside because you have not left her. She is glad that your still around. Just pack up and move on and she'll want you to come back. Just remember your son will always be their for you and he will always love you no matter what mistakes his mom makes. good luck.
2006-07-10 15:03:18 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can love someone but them not be right for you. A relationship is based on mutual respect. Your friend may care about you, but not enough not to screw the mother of your child. And can you really trust her ever again? Will your next child even be yours? Are you sure then one you have is?
2006-07-10 15:03:42 · answer #8 · answered by gplay2001 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she did it once, i would give her one more chance, there is a son to worry about. but don't let her do it again. if she does, then leave her. and deal with your friend also. your best friend shouldn't do that to you. don't be one of the people you see on the Maury show. know when to get out of the situation.
2006-07-10 14:59:39 · answer #9 · answered by Jean S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow i feel sorry for your child, BTW she doesnt love you.
No one who loves someone would do this. Also just so you
know you should be more concerned about how this all will
affect your child. Children raised in stable relationships
are healthier than children in divorces.
2006-07-10 15:00:23 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋