Blonde jokes.?

Question

Let's hear 'um.


p.s. I have nothing against blondes, I just love the jokes. Please, no hate replies.

O.K. I'll tell some, even though that's not the point.

There are two blondes on either side of a river. The first one says, "How'dya get to the other side?"

The second says "Wow, you're stupid! You are on the other side!"



What's a blonde's mating call?

NEXT! (Sorry 'bout that one!)



A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde are swimming a race to an isalnd and back doing the breaststroke. The brunette comes in first, the redhead second, and then the blonde, a day later.

During the awards ceremony the blonde shouts out, "NO FAIR! You guys used your hands!"

Sorry I meant "ISLAND". I don't usually do stuff like that. Hey guys, if you're going to get all serious about this then you need to lighten up. Some of the best jokes I have ever heard were about me. If you can't laugh at yourself, what is there to live for?

Btw, if you have any "jokes about blonde-joke-tellers" feel free to share them, I promise, I will not be offended.

Answer 1

Q:How do you confuse a blonde?

A:put her in a round room and tell her to sit in the corner!

a brunette was walking down the road and came across a sheep herder and she asked him if i can guess how many sheep you have can i have one and he says sure take a crack at it 135 she guesses thats exactly right he says so she picks one then the herder says if i can guess what color your hair really is can i have my dog back?

Answer 2

First of all, you "have nothing against blondes," you just "love the jokes", right? Well, I don't care whether you like me or not, its when you insult me that I start to care. No hate replies? This isn't, I'm just clearing a few things up. Although, if I'd told you my favorite blonde joke, it would be. Not that it portrays blondes in a bad light, but that it portrays blonde joke tellers in a bad light. So, I would do what you asked and tell you a blonde joke, except you asked me not to tell the only ones I like.


You know what really makes me sick? The blondes who either agree and say, "Yep, thats my life" or tell blonde jokes then say "I'm blonde too, no reason to be offended." None at all huh? No, insulting yourself also I guess means I shouldn't be offended. Don't mind me if I don't believe that.

Answer 3

So there's this blonde driving along a long country road. She doesn't realize it, but she's speeding and ends up getting pulled over by a cop, who also happens to be blonde. The cop asks her for her license and registration, but the blonde has neither. The cop asks her for at least a picture identification so that she can make sure she is who she says she is. The blonde reaches into her glove compartment and pulls out a mirror, looks into it, and hands it to the cop. The cop looks in it and says, surprised, "I didn't know you were a cop too...you're free to go!"

Answer 4

There was a blonde who wanted to commit suicide. So she went to a park and brought a rope. Mean while there were a bunch of friends going into the same park... they saw her and asked ,'What are you doing?' she said, 'i'm committing suicide!' then a person asked the blonde, 'then why isn't the rope around your neck?' then the blonde said, 'but I couldn't breathe!'

How can you tell if a blonde has been on the computer? the screen has white-out, there's a cheese by the mouse, and the joystick is wet.

Answer 5

One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.

The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.

He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.

Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.

The blonde started laughing.

This made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.

This time the blonde laughed even harder.

Livid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.

The blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.

The blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"

Answer 6

there was a blonde with no money and seh went over to the playground and on a kids back she stuck a paper that said i have kidnapped ur son leave a thousand $ by the treet tomorrow if u want him back and she sent him home the next day it was there with a note that said how can u do that to a fellow blonde

Answer 7

Not really a blonde joke but here's a Dumb Blonde Test you can send to your friends to find out their score.

http://www.queendom.com/tests/minitests/fx/dumb_blonde.html

Hint: if they can't finish after 30 mins then they're a blonde or they've got blonde hair roots going right through their brain.

Answer 8

I'm a natural blond, and I like the jokes too, I think there funny.lol
I would tell you some, but I suck at telling jokes, I always mess them up.

Answer 9

Two blondes walk into a bar... you think one would have ducked.

Answer 10

this one's silly, but still cute...

why'd the blonde tiptoe when walking by the medicine cabinet??



because she didn't want to wake the 'sleeping pills' :p~~~~~~~