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i found out today from a friend that my dad has been seeing another woman the thing is my dad lives like 5000 miles aways from my mum and they have been living apart for about 4 years becos my mum was trying to complete her nursing my mum is always calling my dad about three times a week but he never msgs her or nething like that... thing is i know my mother has been faithful to my dad but i am unsure as to whether i shud believe my friend we have been best mates since we were really young and have grown up together do you guys think i shud believe her and if so shud i tell my mum pls help this is reallly tearing me apart

2006-07-10 10:24:21 · 31 answers · asked by sunshine1986 2 in Family & Relationships Family

31 answers

~First of all, you don't know for sure what the truth is. Maybe he is, maybe he isn't.

Second, this is their issue, not yours. Parents don't always tell their kids all the details of their marriage.

Stay out of it!

2006-07-10 10:29:45 · answer #1 · answered by damonkey 4 · 0 0

First, until something is proven, it is a rumor, so for now, the information that your friend has given you should be considered a rumor. The "other" woman may just be a friend of your dad's or a business associate. Second, I think that if your parents are living 5,000 miles away from each other no matter how good the reason might seem, (unless one is abroad because they are in the military,) there are already probably already problems in the marriage that they have not discussed with you. There are always sacrifices that can be made to stay together and I'm sure that your mum had more that one choice where to go to nursing school or your dad could have taken a job closer. I am not saying that those are easy choices, but if you love each other, you do what is best for the family unit.
I think that you should talk to your dad. Go visit him if you can. I would not mention the possibility of another woman outright, but tell him that you are concerned that he no longer loves your mum and you wonder why he seldom contacts her. See what he has to say! If you have trouble getting him to talk, then you could bring up the fact that you are concerned that it might be tempting for a lonely man so far away from his wife to start seeing another woman. See if he looks, sounds or acts guilty.
If you do receive proof that your dad is cheating, tell your dad that you know and give him a chance to stop the behaviour. There's no use breaking your mum's heart. Personally, I've told every man that I've had a close relationship with that I would rather not know if he cheated on me. I am happier thinking that I am the only one he wants!

2006-07-10 17:40:30 · answer #2 · answered by runningviolin 5 · 0 0

Don't get involve. Besides you don't know.....you are just going on hear say. If it's true and your mother finds out, act as if you never knew. Four years is a long time to be apart and 5,000 miles. Something does not sound right about that. So in other words, stay out of it.

2006-07-10 18:24:15 · answer #3 · answered by kitcat 6 · 0 0

I would be careful before telling Mom.Why hurt her.A friend telling you is not prove enough of the facts.Be very certain you have them .There are two sides to a story. Your Dad maybe lonely and seeking friendship.Why he doesnot call etc he maybe busy at the time I am sure with that distants its a differant time.Don't hurt Mom on rumors. She loves your Dad let her do so. time will tell soon enough

2006-07-10 17:32:20 · answer #4 · answered by shyknight 1 · 0 0

I believe that you should not tell your mom. She just might know that your dad is cheating but at the same time you don't know what your mom is doing either. I believe they are separated right. If they are that means that nothing is going to work out between them in order to get back together. But this is my opinion. Best of luck.

2006-07-10 17:29:10 · answer #5 · answered by Hoel 1 · 0 0

No, the first thing you need to do is to speak with your father and find out from him what is going on. Let him know how torn up you are about this and that you are deciding what to do.

Also, how do you know that your mother has been faithful? Did she say so? If so, why do you believe her? Give your father the same consideration.

2006-07-10 17:29:36 · answer #6 · answered by Otis F 7 · 0 0

No, your mom and dads relationship is there thing to take care of, you hearing about something then telling her puts you in the middle and you become the bad guy. Best thing for you to do is stay out of it.

2006-07-10 17:48:27 · answer #7 · answered by ABBYsMom 7 · 0 0

That all depends on how much you trust your friend. If you knew beyond a shadow of a doubt and could prove that he was cheating on her, then yes I would let her know, but I don't think that I would just come right out and tell her. I would fix it to where SHE caught him cheating on her and that can be done very easily done. But she does need to know about it, I mean if my husband was cheating on me I would want to know, wouldn't you?

2006-07-10 17:39:08 · answer #8 · answered by SapphireB 6 · 0 0

What ever is going on with you parents is their business. Telling her anything you are not 100% sure of could just make the situation worse. Stay out of it the best you can and good luck!!

2006-07-10 17:27:57 · answer #9 · answered by zara01 4 · 0 0

Wow! Well, I don't know. You are getting this information second hand so it may not be accurate for one thing. You might tell your Mother about what your friend told you. Explaining that it is second hand information. Who knows, your Mother may already suspect something. Do what you feel is best.

2006-07-10 17:31:19 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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